11. Bless
CHAPTER 11
BLESS
A week later, it was Memorial Day. I stood in my master bathroom, putting the finishing touches on my makeup. Through the door, I could hear Legacy in the living room with the kids, urging them to put their shoes on and clean up after the lunch they'd just finished. It was almost time to go. When he decided to move back to Chicago, Legacy and I had agreed to do co-parenting activities together so the kids could see us as one unit. So, despite our recent silence, we were taking the kids out together as we’d planned weeks ago.
As I applied bronzer, I spoke to Darrell quietly through my air pod. "This is a really good idea," I said, my voice barely above a whisper.
"He’s been sober for five years. He deserves a celebration. It’s a big deal, Bless."
"I know it is," I agreed, glancing at the bathroom door nervously. "But you want to have it at my house? Why not have it at your house since it’s bigger?"
"Charon probably won't want to be a part of this," Darrell said bluntly. "You know how she is. I don’t want her attitude to ruin it. If we do it at your place, there won’t be any tension."
I sighed, knowing he was right. "True. It’ll be easy to get him over here. I can make up something about the kids."
"Great. I'll handle the rest. I’ll send someone over to decorate and I’ll handle the food too.”
As I listened to Darrell’s plans, I could hear Legacy’s gentle but firm voice in the background, guiding the kids. "Get y’all shoes on. We need to get going soon."
"What day do you plan on having it?" I asked Darrell as I played with my newly-installed bob. It had gotten so hot that I had to let the long bundles go.
"His sobriety birthday is in a few weeks. I’ll double check the exact date and text it to you."
I nodded although Darrell couldn’t see me. "All right... Thanks for doing this. He’s going to be so happy."
"I’m proud of him so I’m excited to do it."
Touched, my bottom lip poked out a bit. I wished that Charon could be this supportive.
“Plus, it will give him something to be happy about, considering Ri’s anniversary is around the same time.”
The mention of it caused me to pout. “Right.”
“We’ll go over the details later,” Darrell said, talking over the sudden tension. “Go ahead and finish getting dressed.”
“Okay.”
I ended the call and took a deep breath, feeling the nerves settle in. The day hadn’t even gotten started, and I was already anxious. The tension between me and Legacy was thick, and navigating it was giving me a panic attack.
I looked at myself in the floor-length mirror next to the shower. I had chosen denim shorts and a crop top that tied in the front, paired with my Jordan Ones. I wanted to be comfortable for the adventure park, but a part of me also wanted to look cute enough to catch Legacy’s attention. The vision of his date’s perfection at the party a few days ago had me feeling competitive.
As I was about to leave the bathroom, my phone rang again. This time, it was Raja. I sighed with reluctance and frustration. He had been more persistent since he saw Legacy. It was almost as if he was feeling competitive too.
"Hey, Raja," I answered.
"Hey, you.”
When he greeted me, I wanted to swoon. I wanted to purr. But I remained silent, adjusting my top in the mirror.
“What are you up to today?" he asked.
"I'm taking the kids to an adventure park with Legacy. I told you that a few days ago.”
"Why don't you come to a day party with me instead?"
Frustration caused my eyes to roll. "I just told you that I’m spending the day with my kids."
“You can let the kids go with Legacy alone. You're always with them, Bless. Take a break for yourself.”
His persistence began to grate my nerves, making me shut down. I couldn't believe his audacity. "Are you seriously asking me to choose you over my kids? I can’t just drop my plans with them because you want me to go to a party."
"Come on, Bless. You need some time for yourself too.”
"Raja, I already told you I’m spending the day with my kids. This isn’t up for discussion," I snapped.
There was a brief silence on the other end before he sighed. "All right, fine. Have fun with your kids."
"Thanks," I said curtly before hanging up.
I took a deep breath, gathering my composure before leaving the bathroom. As I opened the door, I was caught off guard by the sight of Legacy standing in my room just a few steps away as if he were about to knock on the bathroom door.
As our eyes met, he smirked. “You don’t have to keep sneaking to have conversations with your boo.”
His slick comments only intensified the frustrations that Raja had ignited. “I’m not hiding shit. Don’t come in here talking shit after barely saying a word to me for a week.”
His brow rose dramatically as his expression became more teasing. “Ooo. Getting you some dick got you feisty.”
I scoffed. “Getting some dick? Listen at you sounding loud and wrong as hell. I’ve never fucked him, if you must know. I haven’t had sex in a year and I’ve barely had it since I put you out. Now, can we get the fuck out of here?”
As soon as I said it, I regretted it. I wanted to recant, to take it back, but the look on Legacy’s face had stolen all feistiness from me. He took a step back as if stunned. Then, his expression softened into one of compassion and admiration. It was a look I hadn't seen in a long time, a look that transported me back to when things were simpler between us. The love in his eyes caught me off guard, making my heart skip a beat.
Suddenly, I felt exposed under his admiring gaze. A rush of shyness washed over me. I quickly averted my eyes and shuffled past him, eager to escape the intensity of the moment. My cheeks flushed and my heart pounded as I hurried out of the bedroom and into the living room.
The familiar sounds of my kids snatched me back to the present.
“Mommy, can we go now?!” Riley excitedly asked as her little feet quickly ran towards me.
“Yes, we’re ready to go, baby.” I looked towards Zara and Eden who were wrestling playfully on the couch. “Stop before you mess up your hair, Zara! C’mon. It’s time to go.”
Feeling his presence behind me, I glanced back and saw Legacy still standing silently in the doorway of my bedroom, his eyes fixed on me. The gentleness in his gaze was unmistakable. It was a stark contrast to the distance and avoidance that had been there for so long. For a moment, I felt a surge of appreciation that he was giving me his undivided attention again, that he was no longer avoiding my eyes, and that he seemed to be basking in my presence.
But that warmth brought with it a wave of fear. The intensity of his gaze, the rekindled connection—it all felt too overwhelming, too close to the pain I had tried so hard to move past, too close to exposing my truth. The fear made me want to run, to escape the vulnerability.