19. Stella
STELLA
Suddenly waking up soaking wet with my own sweat, I sit up in bed and moan.
Even after a few weeks my body still hasn’t fully recovered.
There are times I think I’m all healed but one wrong move and I’m in agony.
The club’s doctor told me it takes time, as I did have broken ribs and some extremely bad bruising all over my body.
And let’s not even talk about my feet, they were a mess when Cullen found me.
Lying back down, I can hear my man and daughter downstairs, probably starting breakfast. I feel so disconnected at times, then other times we are finally truly the family I’ve always wanted.
The one I always dreamed about but it never seemed to be in the cards with our jobs and life in general.
I’m just sorry that both of us had to go through all of this bullshit.
It’s changed us and I don’t like it at all.
I have no idea how to get us back to how we were.
Cullen thought that by bringing those men who harmed me back to the clubhouse and his wet room where he tortured and killed them all.
It didn’t work out like either of us thought it would.
I mean, he’s afraid to put his hands on me, and yeah, I’m not looking to get a hard fuck but would like some emotional support.
The one person I can count on is Nickel.
That kid is always around and listens to me for hours.
I believe Cullen put him on me as my bodyguard, which is whacked.
I mean, I’ve worked for the government my entire adult life and he puts a wet-behind-the-ears kid on me.
Oh well, he’s a good guy and Isabella loves her Uncle Nickel, so all’s good here in Indiana.
The first call to my family didn’t go over too well, to say the least. My mamma demanded to know where I was and, no kidding, the next morning my entire family showed up at the Kings of Anarchy Indiana chapter clubhouse asking, nope, according to Sparkle, demanding to see me.
When Cobalt went to talk to them my papà, he called the president of said motorcycle club an asshole and to mind his business and get the person in charge there now.
When Mammoth, being Mammoth, bellowed he had the man himself right in front of him, my papà —the story goes—is that he turned white and took a step back.
Cobalt, always being a good guy, totally ignored what Papà said and introduced not only himself but every brother who was there before he told Dreamer to come get us.
When Cullen, Isabella, and I walked in both of my parents almost collapsed.
Thank God Psycho and Ghost were standing close to them.
I knew why because I was beat to shit, could barely walk, and just looked like total hell.
Cullen didn’t look too good either from lack of sleep, food, and everything else he went through since I was taken.
The only one kind of like themselves was Isabella, who screamed in excitement and ran toward my parents.
“Nonna, Nonno, Mamma didn’t tell me you were coming out to visit. Wait, why is the whole famiglia is here? Oh, is it because Mamma was taken and Papà and all of my uncles had to go save her? Oh not only Mamma either, Nonna, they brought back Auntie Milly too.”
When my mamma turned toward me I nodded just a little.
They both had met Felicity and Milly a few times when Cullen was overseas.
Something I kept from him until recently.
I didn’t want to distract him when he was on a mission, and Felicity didn’t deserve even a millisecond of time in his mind.
Let’s just say my husband was not happy I kept the secret from him, but because of what I went through he didn’t lose his mind. Well, yet.
After everyone in my famiglia, as my daughter calls them, said hi and exchanged very careful hugs, Sparkle called everyone to the table.
Once again she had made some of my favorites like chicken Parmesan with garlic bread.
Also there was some roasted hot Italian sausage with all colors of peppers with garlic and onions.
And her salad, which I’ve fallen in love with because it has just about every single vegetable in it.
I watch my mamma and papa look at the food then back at me, then the food.
When Mamma put some on her plate, she waited as everyone else did until Isabella said grace.
I continued to watch because my mamma is a food snob.
We all know it and put up with it and her.
None of us can make Italian food like she can and she always finds something that could be done better.
She takes a smaller bite of the chicken Parmesan, chewing it, and I watch as her eyes start to get big as she cuts a larger piece.
As she chews that piece her eyes close and, in total shock, I look to my brothers and sister.
Never once has she ever had that kind of reaction to any of our cooking.
Sparkle, so out of it, looks down and sees her eyes closed and jumps up immediately.
“Oh, I’m so sorry. It’s probably not as good as yours, ma’am. Didn’t know Stella’s folks were coming or I would have asked her what y’all like. Please excuse me, hope it’s not too bad.”
My mamma’s eyes look up at Sparkle and again I feel shocked because she’s looking at her like she does us, her kids.
“Sparkle, correct? This is probably the best chicken Parmesan I’ve ever eaten. How is my question, and secondly, I need your recipe immediately. And please call me Margherita, Miele.”
My family all laughs as my, mamma always calls everyone Miele or in English, honey.
When Sparkle looks my way, I give her a smile and mouth that it means “Honey,” which brings a sad smile to her face.
There’s a story behind that sadness and I’ll need to find out some day.
During the meal everyone gets along, talking and getting to know each other.
Everything is going great until my papà stands, calls my three brothers names, and then Cullen’s.
Oh shit, not the big Italian Papà talk. I mean, they know we are married.
For Christ’s sake, they had Isabella with them during this last mission.
I think my papà is going to try and blame Cullen for this shitshow and I can’t let that happen as the guilt is killing him.
He didn’t make it three days before he came into our bedroom, sat in a chair next to the bed, demanding I tell him every single thing that was done to me.
I gasped because I had no intention of telling him anything.
As I kept my mouth shut, he raised his voice until he was screaming at me, face all red, hands in fists.
I think I heard the footsteps first but when the bedroom door burst open he shut up instantly.
Cobalt, Mammoth, Nickel, and Julie stormed in with Cobalt’s woman coming right to me as she got on the bed, holding me closely.
This woman is something else. I’ve never met someone so sassy, smart-assed and cute, all at the same time.
I instantly could tell when I met Julie that Cullen had a soft spot for her.
When we first got back to the clubhouse, not sure who ran out first, Isabella or Julie.
When my little one went to jump at me it was Julie who pulled her back gently, leaning down, and I guess telling her to be careful with me.
That right there really touched me for some reason, and since then I’m surprised to say we are becoming good friends.
I mean, how could someone not like Julie?
After I heard her story and how she got involved with The Kings of Anarchy and Cobalt, it shocked me.
First, the man, as hot as he is, and that is something I’ve always held close.
Cullen will never know that thought, but Cobalt was as cold as ice when it came to women.
How Julie got through I’ll never know, but they work. It’s nice to see him so happy.
Back to that day my husband demanded all my details, Julie acted like a pitbull, protecting me.
I actually started laughing and ended up crying in her arms. Cobalt grabbed Cullen and pulled him out of the room.
I spent most of the day and night talking to Julie, though she never asked what happened to me.
We talked about stupid shit, men, and the Kings of Anarchy club.
She now does their books, which I hear she’s excellent at.
I have no idea what I’m gonna do when I’m ready to go back to work.
After giving myself a couple of days I called my boss, who immediately started reaming my ass, going off on my lack of work ethic, and how did I think not contacting my employer for weeks was acceptable.
After listening to him for a quick minute or two, it ended up with me quitting after I told him to shove the job up his ass.
Since then I’ve had upper management try to get me to come back.
They even fired his ass, just to see if I’d come back since he was gone.
Something though changed for me during my time being held.
I don’t want to take chances with my life anymore or jeopardize losing my family ever again.
So that leaves my future up in the air for sure.
If I do what Cullen suggested, I’ll be a stay-at-home mom, never working again.
As awesome as that sounds, after probably a month—tops—I’d be going crazy.
Not because I don’t want to be with Isabella, but I’m the type of person who needs a purpose and to help others.
That’s why I thought working for the government would feed my soul.
The longer I worked for our country, the more I hated the politics included and how badly they treat our military.
That’s why I stepped up and helped Cullen with getting Cobalt back.
I had to change employment after that, but it was worth it.
Those fucking dicks were going to let him and the others die.
Or be tortured first then die. I just couldn’t, even if I wasn’t involved with Cullen never could I have lived with myself if I didn’t help them.
I slowly get out of bed, make my way to the bathroom to go pee, then step into the shower to wash the sweat off of me.
My body is now scarred from the abuse those assholes did to me, but I had the last laugh.
It will make me sound like a crazy woman, but I don’t give a fuck.
I sat in Incubus’s wet room while he tore those three motherfuckers up.
I mean some of the shit he did scared me because it was so demented, but they deserved that and more.
I wasn’t alone though, through it all Julie and Sparkle sat beside me, even though Cobalt and Cullen were against it.
I was glad they were there because don’t think I’d have gotten through it without them.
And to see Cullen literally turn into the feared enforcer Incubus was both exciting and scary as shit.
Though my exciting moment was not like the times before when he’d work out, get all sweaty, and turn me on so much I’d be dripping wet.
That will probably come back, but it’s going to take some time.
By the time my abusers were gonna die I asked for one more favor, a huge one.
Incubus looked at me for a long time before he grabbed a phone off the counter and told whoever what to do.
As we waited he played with the assholes, taunting them while picking up body parts off the floor and throwing them in a garbage bag.
When the door opened and Milly walked in, I let go of the girls’ hands and walked right to her. She never blinked an eye at what she was seeing.
“I wanted to give you a choice because you deserve it after all they did to you. This is a once in a lifetime and you have to swear you never saw a fucking thing because if you talk about it, we are all dead. No kidding, even though he’s my husband.
Right now you are looking at the enforcer Incubus and he don’t play, Milly.
I’m taking out Lefty and you know why. If you want one tell them who, or you can turn around and leave, your choice. ”
Milly says not one word but points at the one she wants dead.
Incubus comes to both of us, asking how we want to do it.
We both look at each other and then tell him.
When he goes to a safe he unlocks it and pulls out two guns, giving one to me and one to Milly.
We both approach the men, barely conscious, and that pisses me off.
So I turn to Incubus, asking him to have someone throw cold water on them.
I want Lefty to know it was me who ended his sorry as fuck ass.
Once they have had cold water thrown on them and ice cubes placed on their balls, eyes open wide with fear and something else, not sure what it is, and I didn’t care.
Incubus was taking out the third person, that way if any of us ever talk about it we incriminate ourselves too.
Cobalt comes up behind us, telling Milly and me that he’ll count it down and after he says one, pull the trigger.
As he counts everything this motherfucker did to me comes to mind and, after one, I aim the gun exactly where I wanted to hit, as I knew he wouldn’t die immediately but bleed out.
Looking to my left, I’m shocked as shit to see Milly shoot the other asshole in the same place.
As they both start wailing, screaming, and swearing, we move back and watch as they start to bleed.
When Incubus walks up to each of them, gutting them, we then watch them until they both die.
Not because we shot them in their dicks but because besides being shot there the enforcer gutted them, pulling out their intestines and wrapping them around their necks.
Incubus, of course, shot his guy right between the eyes.
It’s a day I will never forget, as stupid as it sounds, all that was done and how I ended it gave me my life back.
Now I need to convince my husband I’m on the road to recovery.