Chapter 8
Killian
I walk Celani to the mudroom and she slips on a light jacket before putting on her sneakers. I open the back door and step outside before her, scanning the yard and the woods further off before letting her come out.
She puts her hands into the pockets of her windbreaker and kicks the leaves as we walk past the covered pool, guest house and pool house, then make our way down to the pond. I keep an eye out around us as we go, breathing in the cool Fall air.
I look down and notice that her shoe is untied, and reach over to put my hand on her arm.
“Hold on,” I say, bending down onto one knee and taking her laces in my hands before folding one over the other.
“Oh.. you didn’t have to,” she says quietly as I knot them and stand back up. “Thank you Killian. You’re always so thoughtful.”
She puts her hand on my arm and I look down at it. I want to tell her that tying her shoes is the bare minimum a man should be doing for her, but instead I just nod and say, “You’re welcome.”
Her eyes hold onto mine for a moment before she drops her hand from me and starts walking again. I’ve gotten used to her quiet mood today, so when she suddenly speaks up again, I almost stop walking.
“I know you probably heard the conversation that Pierce and I had in the car yesterday,” she says, not stopping her stride, or looking over at me.
“I have had a few..issues that doctors tell me can make it harder for me to conceive. There was a time a few years ago when things were much better with Pierce and I, and we were trying, but it never happened.”
I stay completely silent, a part of me wanting to give her the space to let out her feelings, while the other part of me is too shocked to speak. I didn’t expect her to share any of this with me.
In my mind I’m thinking how lucky she is that she and Pierce didn’t conceive a child considering what a bastard he is, but I know that it is insensitive to think that way. I can see the sadness and longing in her eyes at just the mention of getting pregnant.
“Anyways,” she sighs, stopping next to the pond and looking out across it to another home in the distance. “Now I’m 40 and time is just tick-ticking away for me to figure it all out.”
She looks up at me and frowns. “What Pierce said to me-“
“Was out of fucking hand,” I finally speak up, unable to hold my tongue any longer.
I step closer to her and put my hand on her arm.
“He had no right to speak to you like that and act like he was doing you a favor by proposing to you. As if somehow your worth as a woman is diminished by not being able to conceive easily,” I rumble, growing angrier the more I think about his words.
“You don’t have to explain your history to me, or try to make sense of why he said what he did.
He should be embarrassed. Not you, Celani. ”
My heart is pounding by the time I finish my long rant, and I drop my hand from her arm, and open and close my hands into fists to try to calm down. She stares at me silently for a moment, obviously surprised by my response.
It’s probably more than I’ve said to her at one time in the entire month that we’ve known each other. For a moment I think I’ve said way too damn much, which is something I’ve never been accused of before.
She measures me with her sharp brown eyes, and tilts her head at me.
“Damn. You really get it,” she says softly, almost too quiet for me to hear.
We hold each other’s gaze again for a few moments, and the look in her eyes is different this time. She blinks away from me and turns to continue walking around the pond without another word.
The rest of our walk is quiet and I wonder if she’s ruminating over our short conversation the same way that I am right now. We circle back around and the wind picks up, spurring us on to walk faster up to the house.
We go inside and I help her out of her jacket, and she smiles before hurrying off into the kitchen. I see her turning on the tea kettle as I come in, and I look at my watch knowing she must be ready for me to go now.
“Celani,” I say, but she is too busy bustling around to hear me.
She takes out a box of tea from the pantry then grabs two mugs. She turns off her electric kettle and makes me a cup of tea without even asking. I stare at her as she comes over and holds out a mug to me that has brightly colored leaves circled around it.
She looks up at me, her beautiful face glowing from the cold, and smiles.
“Will you stay with me a little longer?”