Chapter 17 #2
Carn sighed as I scrubbed the dried blood from his shoulders and I resisted the urge to coo at him like I had before we could talk.
It was hard to believe I’d ever seen him as a big threatening animal that needed baby talk to calm down.
It was harder to believe I wasn’t scared of him after watching exactly what he was capable of.
My cheeks heated as I recalled some of the nonsense I’d spouted trying to keep his lid on.
“Sorry for how I talked to you before,” I blurted out. “I didn’t mean to treat you like you were stupid or anything, I just didn’t know what else to do.”
His big ears tilted back but he didn’t turn around.
“I didn’t mind.” His tail fluttered lazily near my foot. “No one had spoken to me kindly in so many years... I savored every word that came out of your mouth.”
I found myself dropping a quick kiss on top of his head and giving him a strange backwards hug.
He jolted as my arms came around his shoulders, a deep rumble emerging from his chest when he realized what was happening. One warm hand landed on my forearm, and he turned his face into my neck, taking a deep breath like he wanted to imprint my scent in his brain.
The romance of the thought withered when I realized I hadn’t showered in forever.
I jerked back, and dunked my rag back in the water.
“Let me finish washing you up so I can get clean,” I muttered, praying my face wasn’t as red as it felt. I wasn’t opposed to a little hanky panky, but I wasn’t letting him near me until I washed my pits at least.
He craned his neck, amused confusion painted on his bulky features. Feeling watched, I shot him an arch look and shoved his face forward with one hand.
“Hold still.”
Carn huffed, but the contented flicking of his tail told me he wasn’t irritated with my manhandling.
My bowl of fizzy water was more brown than green now, but Carn’s hair was clean and his shoulders and back were clear of blood. Swiping down his collarbone, I resisted the urge to linger on his enticing muscles and dropped the rag into his lap.
“Scrub your front, I’ll be right back.”
I made my way back to the bathroom and slid the door shut behind me. The light flicked on automatically and I flinched when a screen lit up, displaying my filthy, half naked body at an uncomfortable magnification. I could see every pore, every bruise, every hair in ultra HD.
“Everything about this place sucks,” I muttered, glaring at my reflection. “Who makes a space mirror this intense with fluorescent lighting?”
I leaned forward until my palms rested on the long trough-like sink and I had a front row seat to the way my bra looked sweat stained and smeared with alien blood. A thin film of dirt and grime covered my skin, little rivulets of dried sweat leaving tracks of clean skin on my chest.
I hadn’t decided if I wanted to jump Carn, but I did know that wasn’t happening until I was the right color again.
The room didn’t have a shower stall, but there was a drain in the center of the floor and a perforated tile on the ceiling.
It took a lot of fumbling but eventually I figured out how to turn the water on.
The green tinted liquid gushed out in spurts and sprays from the ceiling, it was lukewarm but felt like heaven on my sticky skin.
It automatically turned off after five minutes and wouldn’t restart but I’d gotten the worst of it and I managed to clean the remaining patches in the sink. In lieu of a towel, I did my best to squeegee the water off my body with my hands, sniffing my arm to see if the disinfectant left a smell.
It didn’t.
When I’d showered, scrubbed my teeth with a finger and fluffed my bangs so I didn’t look like a drowned shih tzu, I realized I didn’t have clean clothes.
My discarded underwear and bra were so gross they practically stood under their own power and there was no way I was putting that nastiness anywhere near my newly clean self.
Ignoring my clothing situation, I turned back to the mirror as I combed through my damp hair. My bangs needed a trim, and the disinfectant soap made my hair feel like straw but I’d done the best I could.
The obnoxious mirror pointed out every flaw on my nude body and I fisted my hands at my sides and forced myself to only look at my face.
I looked... average. I was comfortable with average.
Losing a literal limb in highschool had gone a long way to distract me from the more common insecurities.
If asked, I’d say I was pretty confident in how I looked.
But suddenly I wondered if my confidence had come from assuming no one would ever see me naked. Standing on the cusp of being fully exposed for the first time, I hesitated.
“Come on,” I hissed at my reflection. “He’s seen ninety percent of your body, and he’s not even human. What on Earth could he possibly compare you to?”
Literally nothing on Earth. Carn had no porn, past hook ups or lingerie models to hold me up against. But still, I had to force myself to turn toward the door.
I trusted Carn not to attack me if I walked out naked. He couldn’t exactly judge since he’d been buck ass naked since I’d met him. Maybe there was a linen closet or an emergency blanket tucked away in the lounge.
I could handle hopping around with my tits out for a few minutes until I found something. I refused to let nerves over being naked around Carn stop me when a real life alien kidnapping hadn’t.
Sliding the door open I poked my head out and gauged the room. Carn was sitting where I’d left him, staring down at himself.
Probably still trying to scrape all the dead people off his magnificent abs, I thought grouchily, picturing the complete lack of muscle on my own torso. Moving as steadily as I could, I crept around the perimeter of the lounge, aiming for the pile of supplies.
Just my luck, there was exactly nothing clothes-like to be had. I couldn’t exactly make a bikini out of torn up food wrappers, so I resigned myself to spending the rest of the night exposed. It was fine, I wasn’t wildly uncomfortable at all.
There was an awkward moment when Carn spotted me, registered my nudity and then fixed his eyes firmly on my forehead like his life depended on it. I did my best to ignore the sudden tension and maneuvered myself to the floor before poking at our space picnic.
After a long pause, Carn joined me and we spent several minutes chewing in complete silence.
Nervous butterflies swarmed through my stomach as I hitched my knees higher and did my best to strategically cover all my private parts.
If I really wanted to, I could put my disgusting bra and underwear back on, I’d live.
But as unsteady as I felt, the rapid pounding of my heart was more excitement than fear.
Maybe I’d lost my mind, but I wanted Carn in a way I’d never imagined wanting anyone.
If the hesitant looks he was casting me were any indicator, he felt the same. Part of me wanted him to toss the strange picnic to the side and tackle me, cut through the suspense and take over so I could stop overthinking everything.
But the big, over-muscled male was too much of a sweetheart to make that move and I knew it.
I’d never trusted any guy enough to get naked around them, and here I was completely confident that this feral, unsocialized alien gladiator would be a gentleman.
As if to prove my point, Carn ripped open a brick shaped package and handed it to me shyly.
“It’s safe to eat, I’ve had something similar before.”
My eyes dropped to the half open package and my nose wrinkled when I took in the shriveled gray and green leaves knotted up with tiny, translucent fish. There was a sheen of yellow grease pooling in the corners of the shallow tray but the whole mess only smelled vaguely vegetal.
“Thanks,” I forced out. I really didn’t have the luxury of being picky. Neither of us had eaten a full meal in over a week and it’s not like we could stroll into the cafeteria and order spaghetti.
There didn’t seem to be any utensils, so I picked up a clump of wilted, slimy leaves and quickly stuffed them in my mouth.
The oil was a surprisingly tangy sauce with a strong artificial aftertaste, and the texture was gaggy at best but I managed to choke the mouthful down.
After making sure I was eating, Carn grabbed four more bricks, ripped them all open and tucked in like he was starving.
My stomach twisted as I realized how much food he’d been going without to keep me fed.
We ate in silence until Carn was finally satisfied and pushed the pile of supplies aside. Feeling bold, I scooted over until our hips were touching and joined him in staring at the sealed door.
“I can’t believe you started a rebellion,” I murmured, trying to imagine what chaos was happening in the rest of the ship.
He scratched his chest and sighed.
“I barely remember what happened,” he admitted. “The rage blurs my thoughts, I was focused on killing my opponent and coming back to you.”
My heart gave a lopsided little patter at his words.
“But you didn’t. Kill him, I mean.”
“Almost,” his voice was distant like he was combing through his thoughts for the first time. “He was strong, determined, but he didn’t rage. Only one eye...” he trailed off and I tried to picture a turoch with one eye and the balls to survive Carn’s rage.
“And he has a human mate?” Maybe I wasn’t a complete freak for getting a little hot and bothered over an alien. At least mine had all his parts, then again I really had no leg(ha, ha) to stand on when it came to missing pieces.
Carn blinked and turned his attention back to me.
“Yes, he smelled you on me and recognized another human. His mate was supposed to be the prize for the fighter that killed him.”