16. Bonnie
It’s the day before my sixteenth birthday.
Birthdays are never something I tend to look forward to, because ever since I was little, we’ve never celebrated it. Hence the whole, my father doesn’t actually want me, drama.
King and Dax always did what they could to make me feel special. They’d get me gifts, and Maria would bake a cake. But it was never a big event.
The past few years, they’ve been a lot more fun.
That has everything to do with Puck.
However, recently, Puck, King, and Dax have been acting weirdly suspicious whenever I mention my birthday.
I don’t know if it’s because they’re planning something, or if it’s because they have enough going on.
King has been completely closed off lately. He’s always in Carlo’s office and just seems moodier than usual. I can’t remember the last time I actually saw him smile. Like, really smile.
Dax has been more preoccupied with King, even spending more time in Carlo’s study with him.
Puck is still occupying my every waking thought, but I know he’s worried about his friends too.
So although I’d love to believe they could be planning something, they’ve got their own stuff going on.
I’ve just finished getting dressed, when one of Carlo’s men appears at my bedroom door, a horrid smirk on his face. He reaches in, grabs hold of the door handle, and slams it shut, locking it behind him. The click of the lock echoes in the silent room.
Someone must be coming to the mansion.
Nearly sixteen years old, and I’m still trapped in my room when someone comes here.
Rolling my eyes, I head over to the window and look out at the driveway, watching a car pull up, and a man, who I recognise by now as Kennedy Harlow, leader of the Second District, exit the car and walk up the steps to the house.
A few minutes later, just as I go to walk away, the rear passenger door opens and a girl with dark hair like mine, who looks like she could be the same age as me, steps out. She wipes her forehead with the back of her hand like she’s hot, and then looks around her, studying the building I call my home.
I disappear half behind the curtain, scared she’ll see me watching her, although maybe it would be a good thing for a stranger to spot me.
For someone to finally see me.
After a few more seconds of her curious gaze over the mansion, she turns, walking to the fountain where the car is parked and dipping her hand in to wet her face, then perching on the edge of it.
The longer she looks at the brick wall, the more I build up the courage to step out from behind the curtain. To wave, to make myself known.
She looks kind, and I imagine for a second what it would be like to have a girlfriend. Someone I can talk to about stuff. Stuff I can’t talk to King or Dax about, to Puck and Maria.
Just as I go to step out from the curtain, King walks up to the girl, making her jump and lose her balance, but King reaches out to stop her from falling.
My heart stutters, and although I have been envious of King all my life for the freedom he has, it’s only now, in this moment, that I feel resentful towards him.
I can’t stop the bitter acid taste on my tongue, seeing King have another thing that I want first.
They talk for a few minutes and it’s then that I see the smile on King’s face and what looks like him to be laughing.
King, laughing. It’s something none of us get to see much anymore now that our dad’s got to him.
They both sit back down on the edge of the fountain, and moments after that, the girl”s arm reaches out and pushes King into the water. My jaw drops open, and a little laugh falls from my lips. Damn, I wish I had filmed that.
The girl laughs, King surprisingly still smiling, and seconds later, he’s pulling her in behind him.
They look so carefree and happy, when King swipes some of her hair behind her ear, leaning in.
They look like how kids our age should feel. Like how I feel when I’m with Puck.
But the moment is broken for them when Kennedy comes storming up to them from the mansion steps, his shout so loud I can hear it through the closed window.
“Theodora Harlow!”
So the girl must be his daughter. I take note of the way she reacts to him, how she flinches away from my brother instantly, how her eyes widen in a slight panic at the presence of her father.
I instantly want to call out to her. To tell her that our fathers don’t mean a thing. That we can be so much more than they expect of us.
She goes to run to the car, when King stops her, holding on to her hand. After whatever he said, returning the smile back onto her face, she runs to the car, climbing into the back seat again.
And just like all rom-coms, the moment ends, and the car is flying down the driveway and out of the gates.
I don’t hear my door unlocking. I don’t even hear Puck entering the room and apologising for not being here when my door got locked.
I just watch King, watching the car peel out of the driveway, a look of longing on his face before the sad expression returns that we’ve all become familiar with.
I’ve always been so selfish and self-centred around the hand life dealt me that I’ve never taken into account how hard it must be for my brother.
Whilst I don’t have a single ounce of attention from Carlo, King has it all. But it’s not in the way a father should love a son. It’s the way a lieutenant would command a soldier.
King has always done what he can for me, to be there for me. Maybe I should start being there for him a little more.
Later that day,I try to find Puck, King, and Dax, but they’re nowhere to be found. Not in their rooms, not in the gym or outside. The only conclusion I have is that they have left the house, and my heart sinks a little that they’ve left without saying goodbye, but that they also won’t be here to ring in my birthday. Not that it’s ever something we’ve done before, but I was hoping that, because it’s my sixteenth, we could all stay up till midnight.
The fact I can’t find Puck is crushing. I thought he would want to be with me, at least.
Walking through the hallway back from checking the boys’ rooms, I pass Maria, and she dips her head in. Instantly, I know something is off.
“Where are they?” I ask, and she looks up slowly, a look of awkwardness on her face.
“I saw them leave, but I don’t know where they were going,” she says gently, a small, sad smile on her face.
I walk away from her and straight outside, heading into the woods.
The sky is darkening, the air getting a bit chillier now the sun is setting, but I don’t let it stop me. In a few hours, I’ll be turning sixteen, and the three people in the world I love the most have disappeared on me.
I want to cry, shout, lash out as I continue through the trees, stomping over roots and stumps.
After a couple more steps, I notice a lantern flickering just ahead, and my stomach knots.
Walking towards it, more lights start to flicker, and when I come into the clearing, the trees are shimmering in a warm gold. A blanket with treats and cushions is laid out on the leafy ground, and Puck, my giant, sweet Puck is standing in the middle, a wide smile on his face.
“You are such an ass,” I curse, and he laughs, holding his hand out towards me.
My heart tries to catch up with my mind, but it’s not fast enough, and the tears start to fall.
“Why are you crying?” Puck asks suddenly, worry etching his voice as he runs towards me. Holding my cheeks in his hands, he swipes my tears away with his thumbs.
“I thought you left. I thought you didn’t care, and you left,” I cry quietly, and he chuckles under his breath.
“Bonnie Rhivers, do you really think I’d leave you the night before your birthday?” he huffs out, a mock expression of hurt on his face.
I laugh and shake my head, because I should’ve known better.
“I just thought…” I wipe my tears. “Never mind, I’m just being silly.”
Puck leans down, capturing my lips with his.
“Will you please join me for a pre-sixteenth birthday picnic, Bonbon?”
I laugh against his lips and pull away smiling.
“I would love to.”
He walks me over to the blanket, and I sit in between his legs, leaning against his solid chest with his arms around me, shielding me like always.
The hours pass quickly with food and laughter, and I turn in his lap, kneeling between his legs to face him.
“Do you think I’m a bad sister?” I ask him honestly, and Puck’s brow furrows.
“Of course not. What makes you say that?” Puck replies, his palms smoothing up and down my arms.
“I just, I feel like King is struggling at the moment, and I’ve been so self-centred all my life, I’ve never really considered how he may be feeling.” I shrug.
“Bon, King adores you, and you’re not a bad sister. I think you’re the best little sister King, even Dax, could ever ask for. King has a lot going on with Carlo and being brought into the fold and the business with the Districts. But there is nothing more you can do that you’re not already doing. I know he loves the normalcy you bring him.”
I smile weakly and nod, leaning in to hug him.
“You’re the best of humankind, Bonnie Rhivers. And,” he says, pausing to pull back from me and look into my eyes. “I love you.”
My heart stops. Like, literally stops.
I can’t catch a breath, and Puck laughs, throwing his head back at my state of shock.
“Bonnie Rhivers, we might only be kids, but I know that I love you. I think I always have. And I know you love me, so take a deep breath, and I’ll wait patiently.”
I smile, but the words don’t come, because I still can’t catch my breath. His eyes are shining, his smile huge, and I laugh out loud, a giddy dizziness fogging my brain.
“I love you too,” I say through my laughter, and Puck joins in.
I thought I’d felt happiness before, but it’s nothing compared to the feeling overtaking my whole body, mind, and soul of hearing I love you from his mouth.
I lean in, kissing him hard, his tongue breaking past my lips in an instant. I climb into his lap, straddling him and pulling my body as close to his as I can.
My arms go around his neck, holding him tightly whilst Puck’s hold both of my hips in a tight grip.
I have never felt more content in my whole life than I do right now.
Pushing myself closer, I feel the insides of my thighs brush up against Puck, who is hardening underneath me, and I pause my movements, pulling back from his lips to look down at him.
I’m panting, the kiss stealing my breath from me, my cheeks pink as Puck breaths heavily. I roll my hips back a little, and Puck flinches underneath me when I feel his bulge.
“Bonnie,” Puck whispers, and I can hear him swallow.
“I’m minutes away from being sixteen,” I whisper back, my heart racing.
He chuckles softly and brings a hand up to stroke my hair behind my ear.
“It’s not about your age, Bon, it’s about here.” He taps my head. “And here.” He taps my heart.
“I want to,” I say quietly, and he nods, shifting us so I’m no longer kneeling and my legs fall around his waist.
“Me too,” he admits, and my stomach twists and turns. “But I need you to be ready.”
I look into his eyes, and I smile, wondering how on earth I ever found someone so kind and protective and perfect.
“Okay.”
Puck leans in, kissing me softly.
“Soon, Bonnie.”
I kiss him, then flatten myself against his chest in the tightest hug.
Puck said he loves me. I said I loved him back.
This is our time.
“Look up at the sky, Bon.” Puck breaks the silence, and just as I do, a huge, colourful firework explodes, followed by another and then another.
I jump off Puck’s lap and look up at the clearing through the trees, watching the fireworks bang, lighting up the sky.
“Happy birthday, Bonnie,” Puck says amongst the noise, pulling me into him.
“I love this!” I exclaim, feeling like a normal sixteen-year-old girl, ringing in her birthday with the person she loves.
“I wish King and Dax were here. That would make this perfect,” I say almost to myself, wondering if Puck would hear it over the loud noises echoing through the trees.
“Who do you think is setting off the fireworks?” Puck asks, and I turn to look at him, a smile on my face, feeling unbelievably lucky to have these boys in my life.
Life might not always be the way you expect it to be, but that’s the problem with comparison; you’ll never be happy with the hand dealt to you if you compare it to someone else”s who might have a royal flush.
I don’t need a full suit. I’m quite happy with my dysfunctional family of four.