Chapter 17 #2
Nicholas cleared his throat. Her voice had an expectant tone to it. Was she trying to make him appear honorable again?
“You’re nothing but a monster. Plain and simple.”
Nicholas was surprised at the sudden return of his father’s words to his mind, some of many which were uttered to him as the years passed after his mother’s death.
“Your fault, it was,” His father had told him again and again, as he sank into the mire of too much drink and debt.
And a monster is now holding onto an angel from Heaven.
Nicholas’s duchess was too good for him; that was the long and the short of it. He would only taint her if she began to think of him as something good, and if he allowed himself to believe it.
“Yes, that’s the only reason,” he said a little stiffly. “I want you to live a comfortable life, Cordelia, with the children, free from the sting of gossip.”
He thought he could sense the slightest bit of disappointment in her eyes, but he ignored it. It was best to disappoint her now than later. She glanced at Wexford again.
“We can never let him near the children, you know. While his presence is odious, I feel better that I can see him here rather than think of him as hurrying to our home under the cover of darkness to take them back.”
Our home.
Her use of those words made a lump rise in his throat, but he swallowed it down. He gripped her waist a little tighter, bringing a lovely gasp from her lips, and she turned back to him, her body just a little bit closer.
“He wouldn’t dare. And every footman of mine is a strong lad with instructions to protect the children at all costs. Now,” he said, about to lean closer to her when the song ended, and couples parted, applauding for the musicians.
Grumbling at the interruption, Nicholas let go of Cordelia and bowed, but he quickly offered her his arm to lead her from the dance floor.
“We need to find you a drink, love,” he said, leading her towards the edge of the ballroom where they came across her family.
“Your Graces!” the viscountess said, clearly delighted to see them both.
Nicholas was loath to let go of Cordelia, but it made him happy to see her embrace her mother and sisters with such delight.
“How lovely to see you,” the viscountess said, curtsying to him.
He greeted her and the sisters, but hurriedly they all began speaking at once to Cordelia, and the viscountess drew him away to a table with glasses of punch.
“Your Grace, my solicitor has told me what you’ve done,” she said. “All those debts. Paid.”
Nicholas shifted uncomfortably on his feet and pulled at his cravat. When he made eye contact with his mother-in-law, she was practically beaming at him, her eyes full of unshed tears.
“Yes, well, it is the right thing to do. And they were not your debts nor your fault. Now, you can live freely and in comfort.” He nodded stiffly, picking up a glass of punch and handing it to her before grabbing one for himself and Cordelia.
“Thank you,” she said, touching his arm. “You have been a blessing to us in so many ways. And Cordelia is looking well this evening,” she turned to look at her daughter still in animated conversation with her sisters.
“Yes, she certainly is.” There was that damned lump in his throat again. Clearing it, he added, “Now if you don’t mind, my lady, I should like to take my wife about the room.”
He groaned inwardly at the delighted smile she gave him, and he slinked away, stepping up to Cordelia to offer her her cup.
“Good evening to you ladies,” he said, trying his best to be his usual charming self in front of Emma and Danae, but the sight of Cordelia with another man had rattled him.
He wanted to get her alone, keep her to himself. Even if he was just a monster and she was the only pure thing in his life. Touching her, being with her was far better than sinking back into the past.
“Your Grace, what a gentleman you are,” Danae said, eyeing Cordelia’s cup of punch.
“I always aim to please, ladies. Always,” he said, making eye contact with Cordelia. “I would have gotten some for you as well, but it seems you have other gentlemen to thank for your punches.”
He nodded at the cups in their hands, and Emma shook her head. “We are strong enough to collect our own cups, Your Grace. But I –”
As if by magic, two gentlemen arrived at the same time to whisk Danae and Emma away for the next set, and then it was just him and Cordelia. He drank down his punch, put down the glass, and offered her his arm.
“Shall we?” he asked. “Take a turn?”
“Very well. What’s this sudden idea?” Cordelia seemed much more relaxed now as they wandered down the edge of the ballroom, nodding in greeting to those who passed. He hoped Cordelia noticed their expressions, a mixture of awe, surprise, and delight.
“A chance to show off my new duchess.”
“And me my new duke?” she teased back.
“Yes, exactly.”
“And you wish to keep me away from Lord Dempshaw.”
“As if my life depended upon it,” he said through gritted teeth, nodding at another acquaintance.
Cordelia laughed, and the sound made the blood rush through his veins. The more time he spent with Cordelia, the more she exited him in, in more ways than one. They were near the balcony doors, and he pulled Cordelia outside into the fresh night air, eager to take this chance.
“What are you doing?” she asked, but he noticed her breathless tone.
He took her glass and put it down on a nearby table, and then he pushed her back slowly against the stone wall of the balcony.
“I find that I am tired of being amongst a crowd.” Both hands were on her waist now, and she had grown more breathless too, biting her lip as her wide eyes looked up at him.
“We have only been here a few minutes.”
“A few minutes too long,” he said with a grin.
He leaned down, his heart beating faster as he neared her lips but then he felt her hands on his chest press against him.
“Nicholas, I want you to tell me about your father.”