Chapter 2 – Rebel
Rebel Caldwell never considered Shakespeare’s work beyond earning a grade.
He was arguably the most gifted writer to have ever lived with tragically written work that gave the English language new words, sayings, and names.
For all his brilliance, he bored her to tears.
She considered a punishment of reading his entire body of work a suitable death sentence.
Certainly, weeks away from fifteen, she shouldn’t know about fading sunsets, glowing fires, or the ashes of youth.
She was youth personified, only recently experiencing the rush of her first kiss.
But as she stepped into the cool, damp evening and left Diesel’s birthday party, her life felt as if it had crashed and burned.
She couldn’t overcome his callousness, not even for one night, and doubted she ever would.
It proved to her that what she mistook as love wasn’t an ever-fixed mark.
It was shaken at the first tempest and couldn’t bear Diesel’s cruelty.
For Rebel, his treatment was the edge of doom and had altered her.
A sniffle escaped her and she realized she was crying.
“Fucking Shakespeare,” she seethed, shoving her phone in her back pocket and swiping angrily at her wet cheeks.
Aunt Kendall, Mattie, and Harley were Bard lovers.
CJ went along for the ride because he’d done anything Harley asked of him at one time.
Somehow, Big Willie seeped into Rebel’s psyche.
Besides, the Language Arts department at Ridge Moore moved like there were no other writers with the credentials to teach students literature.
It didn’t surprise her that she’d compare her life to Sonnets 73 and 116. It just annoyed her.
Drawing in a deep breath, she backed herself to the exterior wall and leaned against it, sidling a glance at the door.
Light bathed the parking lot from the stadium lights dotted among the parking spaces, dulling the beauty of the night sky.
Unlike most parties, there were no patrols, only a prospect recently moved to Probate status.
Another Seven. Hopefully, he didn’t get killed like the other ‘Seven’ had.
Aside from him and her, the entire world seemed deserted because of Diesel’s stupid party.
She thought about going back inside and asking Kaia to leave with her, but he was enjoying himself. Besides, she’d been sitting at the bar and had to walk across the floor to get to the door. Most of the guests saw her leave. Kaia didn’t want to follow her. Otherwise, he would have.
Axel stuck his head out of the door and grinned at her. Music and indistinguishable voices wafted to her. She regretted not slipping into the pocket of shadows that would’ve hidden her from view. The light surrounding her revealed her to everyone.
“Are you coming back in, Reb?”
Not wanting to upset her little brother, Rebel refused to go into detail. Even if she’d known what to say and how to explain her feelings. “No.”
He considered her for a moment, then frowned and walked outside. He was adorable in his jeans, white T-shirt, leather boots, and new cut with a name patch of Sweet Pea. If CJ saw, he kept his opinion to himself.
“What’s the matter?” Axel asked warily.
A lot. Most of which she couldn’t talk to Axel about. Rebel heaved in a breath. “Nothing, Ax,” she swore, wanting peace and happiness when she hadn’t been happy in months. Everything was upside down. “I’m just tired.”
Suspicion darkened his little face and he glanced over his shoulder than looked at her again. “I can walk you home and read a bedtime story to you.”
Rebel smiled. “Who’d walk you back? I’m sure you aren’t ready to leave Diesel’s party.”
“A man don’t need nobody to walk him back,” he huffed.
“I’d worry about you, though,” she told him, not pointing out he was a mini man, not yet a grown one. “All men have someone who worries about them.”
“You’re a girl, so of course you feel that way. Some motherfuckers don’t need nobody to worry about them. They need to get eaten by a vulture and then picked apart by a bear.”
“I’d switch that around, but I get your point.”
“You aren’t grossed out?”
“Nope.”
“Oh brother. I forgot you aren’t a real girl.”
Rebel wasn’t sure how her little brother meant his words. As an observation or an insult, but it didn’t matter. She was too despondent to decipher, so she shrugged.
“I wish I wasn’t a girl,” she said. “No, I wish I could just disappear.”
Tears rushed to her eyes again and she blinked.
Her tears wouldn’t stop, though. After holding them in all evening, a dam had opened.
She’d never not given Diesel a birthday gift.
Or walked out of one of his parties. But it was so clear that he’d expected her to surrender without giving anything of himself. Especially a sincere apology.
Rebel just couldn’t accept his behavior.
She was so miserable, though. Watching Jana give Diesel the painting, timid as usual, nauseated Rebel.
She was young but she wasn’t stupid. Neither one of them listened to her, but she knew both Jana and Diesel were setting themselves up for a lifetime of despair.
No matter how many times Rebel tried to convince her, Jana simply refused to stand as Diesel’s equal or hold him accountable.
Which Diesel needed. Badly. Rebel knew that and had said as much several times.
Why couldn’t Jana see it? Probably because Rebel was so young.
Maybe Jana would listen to Momma. Someone needed to get through to her before it was too late and she married Diesel, allowed him to walk all over her, and then suffered disastrous consequences.
Or maybe she’d just drop it and leave them to their fate. Diesel had known Rebel forever and he refused to take her advice and give Jana the okay to stand up to him.
Rebel didn’t intend to police anyone 24/7, especially her significant other, but she did expect honesty and respect.
Kaia was perfect for her. He was sweet, faithful, and considerate—Diesel’s complete opposite.
Rebel hung her head and sobbed.
Axel threw his little arms around her. “Don’t cry, Reb.”
She returned Axel’s tight hug with a fierce one of her own. “I want Rule,” she said miserably. “I miss him so much.”
It was the easiest and most believable explanation not only for her little brother but her jumbled emotions, a kaleidoscope of memories that began with Momma collapsing and ended here, tonight, with Diesel’s gaze on Rebel as Jana fumbled what Rebel told her to say.
Somewhere between that dizzying whirl of misery was other trauma, including those videotapes of her that she just couldn’t seem to get over as much as she tried.
Axel pulled away from her. “Be right back, Reb—”
“It’s okay. I’m going to walk home.”
“Just stay here. I’ll be back,” he promised, turned and opened the door, allowing the noise of the party to flood out again and disappearing into the clubhouse before she could stop him.
Rebel considered leaving, but she didn’t want him walking through the forest alone.
It was a straight shoot between the club and the houses.
Still, that solitary trek was harrowing with the density of the trees that swallowed everything into nothingness.
Ground lights lined the pathway, but very few penetrated that black void made eerier by night sounds and ground fog.
Her phone beeped. Not in the mood to text, she almost ignored it. However, it could be her mother, asking if she made it home safely. Momma would worry if Rebel didn’t respond.
Sighing, she took her phone in hand. The message wasn’t from Momma.
Kaia: Hey babe. U ok?
Not in the least. She had so many different emotions running through her—shame, guilt, sadness, regret. She didn’t know if she’d ever be okay again.
Rebel: Just needed fresh air. I’m right outside the clubhouse. Want to join me?
Kaia: Can I kiss you? Kissing will help to clear your mind.
Rebel smiled. She’d only ever been kissed twice, both times by Kaia. The first one had been in front of Mattie and Kayce and the second time had been even briefer. Neither time cleared her mind.
Kaia: So…will you…? Let me kiss you?
Rebel: At the clubhouse?
Kaia: No, in my room, where I can teach you properly.
Her fingers hovered over the keyboard. The idea of being alone with Kaia in his room should’ve filled her with anticipation.
He was her boyfriend and he wanted to kiss her.
But she was nervous about going to his room.
She didn’t want to give him the wrong idea because she wasn’t ready for anything more than kissing, which she needed to make very clear to him.
Rebel: It will only be kissing.
She needed to get past those stupid videos. She needed to forget the idea that her prom night would be special for more reasons than one.
Kaia: Will it be so bad if it’s more? You’re on birth control, sweetheart. I promise no one will know what we do. Whatever it is.
Rebel bit her lip. Unless something drastic happened, Kaia would be her boyfriend for a while, and, then possibly, her husband.
Having sex a year earlier wouldn’t make a difference to anyone.
Besides, losing her virginity on prom night was boring and unoriginal.
Except she’d wanted her first time to be special.
Not rushed and sneaky. Evading detection as she left Kaia’s room or finishing whatever before anyone got back home promised for a nerve-wracking experience.
She didn’t want to die an old maid, but she expected to have time with…with…Kaia so he’d put her at ease and make her feel special.
Kaia: Rebel?
Rebel: I’m here. Can we walk home and talk? Play video games for a while and continue to talk while I beat you?
Kaia: Who says you’ll beat me, Chi?
Her belly unclenched and her nervousness eased.
Rebel: I’m very good at videogames, Huahua, especially Mortal Kombat.
Kaia: We’ll see, babe. In between games, we can kiss.