Chapter 12 Eris #2
Levi wanted to play in the kid’s area while Erin and I stayed close by with our Starbucks, seated at a table.
“Are you are in love with Rayzor?” she asked.
I almost choked on my drink.
“What? What made you ask me that?”
“That’s what those women came to you about, Rayzor, right?”
I felt embarrassed.
“That’s not your problem, Erin.”
“It is when they’re messing with you.”
“I’m grown and can handle myself.”
She nodded. “So, are you in love with him? I think he’s in love with you.”
My eyes widened. “You think so? We’re early in our relationship.”
I couldn’t believe I fed into this conversation with a teenager.
“He does any and everything for you, me and Levi. It’s okay if you do.”
“It’s too soon to say.”
“I haven’t seen you this happy. I like this side of you.”
“Oh, you do?” I smiled.
“Yes. It’s all work and auntie Suki and Rhea. Not now. You go out and have fun.”
“And what you be doing?”
“Telling all my friends my sister’s dating a celebrity.”
“Girl, Courtland is just Courtland to us.”
“And that’s what’s different. To you, he’s Courtland but to me and other people, he’s that nig… I mean guy. I still can’t believe he comes to our house and take us places.”
“And does me dating him make you uncomfortable?”
“No.”
“Because I don’t want you to ever think I’ll be too busy with a man that I’ll forget you or Levi.”
“Oh, I know that, Eris. You’re not mom.”
Her words stung.
“Erin…”
“I know, Eris. It’s only so long you can make up lies for her. I hear the rumors. Mom left us to be with a man.”
I felt the sting in my nose; the tears were coming.
In the back of my mind, I felt like a failure. For many years I tried keeping her mind off mom. Every time she asked about her, I made up something, thinking she was gullible. Guess she paid more attention than I thought.
“She loves you.”
“In her own way maybe, but not like you love me. You’ll never do what she did to us with Levi.”
I went home looking for our mom until I gave up. Erin doesn’t know the many nights I spent crying over her disappearance. It made me jaded.
Tears blurred my vision.
Erin got up, rounded the table and threw her arms around my neck.
“I love you, big sis.” She sighed. “Thank you for being here for me when she couldn’t. That’s why I don’t mind you being with Rayzor because you deserve this happiness.”
There was that lump in my throat I got whenever we had to speak on momma. It always left a sour taste in my mouth. Made me feel nervous.
“When did you get so wise?”
“I’ve had a great teacher.” She hugged me tightly and for the first time in a long time of wearing this cape, it didn’t feel heavy– it felt appreciated.
While leaving the mall, there was commotion going on. Crowds in the lot. A lot of yelling and cheering echoed the air.
I thought about the kids first and made a quick line towards the car.
“Damn, Rayzor the boxer is over there whooping some man’s ass. Pulled up and dragged the man out his car,” a woman explained.
My ears grew on fire.
“Excuse me, did you say Rayzor?” I asked her.
I searched the lot and saw his truck parked wildly.
“Girl, yes. He’s over there beating the hell out that man. The man is crying.”
“Rayzor,” Levi said, running away from me when I realized the crowd parted and Rayzor was stalking his way over to me. The crowd followed him.
That’s when I saw Phillip on the ground. I rushed over to Levi, covering his eyes, and pushing Erin behind me.
“What’s up, baby?” He smiled like he didn’t have bruised knuckles.
Not a hair out of place.
I tried looking past him, but his body blocked the way.
“What happened?”
“I called him and told him what he did to you and Levi,” Erin said.
My head snapped.
“Why, Erin?”
“Because he shouldn’t have bothered you. I saw he made you mad. Levi was scared. And since Rayzor told me to call him if something ever happens, I called him. I’m glad he beat him up because he’s a deadbeat.”
My eyes slowly dragged to Rayzor who watched Erin’s rant.
He grabbed my hand.
“You did this for me?”
I thumbed his bruise.
“Hell yeah. I’ll do that shit again too. Behind you, it’s up.”
“I can handle myself, though.”
“I know you can, and you’ve been doing that up until you met me. Now that’s on my back.”
The crowd grew loud behind us.
Rayzor turned around in time to see Phillip charging at him.
He caught him by the throat.
I yelped as my heart thumped.
Phillip was no match for Rayzor.
“Rayzor, no.” I called out.
He glanced back at me.
The wind got quiet.
“I’m gon’ let you live, nigga. But let me say this shit once. That’s my fuckin’ family. That’s my son. You don’t look their way. Matter fact, keep doing what you’ve been doing, stay gone. Ain’ gotta say shit else, right?”
Phillip’s eyes bulged out of his head. He looked like a toy. I wasn’t scared for him; I feared Rayzor getting in trouble.
I walked up, placing my hand on his arm.
“Let him go, baby. It’s not worth it.” I kissed his cheek.
He dropped him. His body sent a loud thud against the ground.
The crowd laughed.
His girlfriend ran over to him. He couldn’t even look her in the eyes. His head hung low; embarrassed and he was out of breath.
“Y’all ready?” Rayzor asked like he didn’t cause havoc.
“Yeah,” I responded.
“Let’s go.” He grabbed my hand, barely looking back at the chaos he caused as we walked through the crowd to my car.
“Who’s Naya?”
He stopped walking, tension in his jaw.
“You ready to ride with me, lil’ man?” he ignored me, grabbing Levi’s car seat from my car.
Erin had already hopped inside his truck, front seat ready.
I stood back, watching him load the car seat, then put Levi inside. When he closed the door, I grabbed his arm.
“So, you’re ignoring me?”
“I’m ignoring you because ain’t shit to talk about.”
“So, who’s she?”
He shrugged. “The fuck if I know, baby. Damn, I came here to get y’all and you wanna talk about bitches.”
“Because the hoe came to me. She a fan or what?”
“Gotta be.”
“Are you in the streets?” I asked curiously.
His jaw tensed again. His eyes shifted like he was checking for something or someone. Shoulders stiff. Something was off. “Nah.”
“So, who’s Naya?”
“Nobody. These hoes jealous. Don’t let a mothafucka knock you off your square. I told you that.” He kissed the side of my head then helped me inside the car.
“That doesn’t answer my question, Courtland.”
He never answered.
Rayzor followed out behind me with the kids.
The subject hung heavy like a shadow.
I wanted to do something at the house. A cookout to formally introduce everyone.
Rayzor was on the grill while I got in the kitchen and made side dishes.
The music was lively and so was the house.
One invitation turned into a houseful. With not one worry, I sipped on my margaritas and cooked in peace.
“Y’all know it ain’t a party if Suki ain’t in the building,” Suki announced herself before we saw her.
She entered with grocery bags. I shook my head while we exchanged hugs.
“I told you not to bring anything.”
“Now when have I ever entered empty-handed?”
“True.”
We cackled.
Rayzor walked into the house, looking good in grilling clothes. Although it was house clothes, the man could make oil look good. He always had my hormones raging. That’s why we had a quickie before people started showing up.
“Sup, Suk.”
“Hey, Rayzor. You can burn?”
“Shit, you tell me,” he replied, handing her a rib. When she bit into it, her eyes rolled back. I smiled because I did the same thing too when I first tasted his cooking.
“Damn, hold on. You might need to put them gloves down and pick up the grill because shit.”
“Hell yeah. Bro nice with the grill. He ain’t better than me though,” City said, entering the room.
Suki rolled her eyes so hard I thought they’d pop out of her head. Rayzor caught it too but didn’t acknowledge it. I took his lead and went to unload the groceries. We had so much going on in every space that we had to make room for more.
“You need help with something, E?” Suki asked.
“Yeah. You know you gotta do that famous pasta. I see you already got the ingredients.”
“Oh, you know that. I can smell that mac and cheese too. I need my pan to-go please.”
I playfully rolled my eyes because I had already made hers. Every time I cooked, she had something separately. I cut her off because she wanted something all the time. Between her and the kids, you’re lucky if I make spaghetti.
I bit into one of the ribs and moaned against my will.
“Damn, that’s how you feel?” Rayzor asked, coming behind me.
I was caught red-handed.
“It doesn’t make no sense how good this is.”
“I want you to slurp me just how you doing that bone.”
“You know I ain’t scared of a challenge,” I flirted back.
As the house filled up, the energy was all love. Of course, everyone knew that I was with Rayzor so when the bit of family and friends I had come through, they couldn’t stop themselves. Rayzor, of course, didn’t want to make it about him.
We had more than enough kids running around the backyard and into the house.
It was a madhouse, but in a good way. I laughed and smiled so much my cheeks hurt.
It’s been a while since I had a house full.
To see Levi having a ball, Erin being in the phone as her and her friends went back and forth between in the house and outside, I was proud that I could make my family happy.
I sat down at the table taking it all in when Rayzor’s strong hands melted into my shoulders as he massaged the kinks out. Leaning into his wrists, inhaling the smell of smoke and barbecue, I exhaled.
“I’m glad you came and sat down because I was about to make you.”
“That makes two of us. Take a seat.”
He had a beer as he rounded in front of me and sat next to me.
“Sorry for the bombarding my family’s doing.”
“It’s cool. I keep telling you I know when to turn that shit off.”
“You know what? I see you all the time, but I don’t see you like everyone else does. It’ll never get old to see people fawn over you.”