Chapter 12 Eris #3
“And that’s what I need. Someone that don’t see me for all the other shit. I’m Courtland at the end of the day.”
“And Courtland’s so pleasant,” I joked.
“I like the reminder of humility you bring me, pretty teeth. Fuck what the cameras say. Boxing’s a job. I want to turn that shit off and be with reality.”
“You’ll always get that with me.”
“And that pussy you got between your legs gon’ always remind me.” He winked.
The moment was short lived when Levi ran outside and ran up to Rayzor.
“Rayzor, I want to box,” his little voice stated.
“Now?” he asked.
“Yes. I told my cousins you’ll show us.”
“Levi, not now. Let him relax.”
“But, Mommy,” he sulked.
“Don’t mommy me.”
Levi’s feelings were hurt, but I meant what I said.
“I got you, lil’ man.”
“Rayzor, you don’t need to do that.”
“It’s cool. I got you when I get done cooking, aiight?”
“Yes.” Levi took off through the yard to the other kids, telling them that Rayzor was joining them soon. They were too damn excited. All I could do was shake my head.
“You gotta stop doing that. It’s time to relax. I thought you could turn work off.”
“You think I’m working play boxing with lil’ man?” He smiled.
“You already spoil him. I don’t wanna make that a habit.”
“You know he asked a while back if I was gon’ be his daddy?”
I gasped with my hands over my mouth.
“No, he didn’t.”
“Real shit when I took him to school. It fucked me up too.”
“What did you say?”
“I mean, what could I say, E? I told him he had a daddy.”
“You’re more a father to him he’s ever been.”
“And that’s why I’m going out there to playbox with my lil’ nigga.”
“Rayzor.”
“This our lil’ family.”
I was confused by his words and how we got here.
“Don’t do that, Rayzor.”
“Don’t do what? It’s already being done. That nigga ain’t stepping up. I’m ya man, right?” He leaned in.
“Right?”
“Yes.” I smiled.
“Okay then.” He kissed my lips. “You’ve been handling shit on your own long enough. These kids deserve a father figure. Shit, I wish I had this opportunity, but you know how that goes with Maleek.”
“I don’t want you taking on that responsibility.”
“What’s hard about being a family man? If a nigga can’t give a roof, time, love and understanding to his family then shit, he don’t need a family.”
“Love?” Was all I heard. My heart thumped rapidly. My hands shook a bit. I barely was able to look him in the eyes.
“Yeah, love.” He paused. “You think I’m taking on all this and don’t love you?”
“You don’t think it’s too soon?”
“Love don’t have a timeframe. Shit, if we being real, I might’ve loved yo’ ass in the backseat of that truck.”
“Rayzor, don’t say anything you don’t mean.”
“You know me baby. I ain’t lying for nobody.”
“Tell me again then.”
“I’ll tell the fuckin’ world. I don’t care who hears me.”
He stood up.
“Aye, can I get y’all attention for a minute?”
The crowd followed his voice, closing in on us.
I covered my face. My cheeks burned.
“Courtland, stop.” I giggled.
He lifted me up bridal style.
“I love this mothafuckin’ woman right here and I just wanna let y’all know.”
I blushed.
My family and friends clapped and cheered.
“Hell yeah,” Suki yelled.
He glanced down at me with a smile.
“I love you, baby.”
“I love you too with your crazy ass.”
He sat down still holding me.
“We’re building towards that. I’m not asking for your hand at marriage. Yet. I just wanna take care of you and the kids. You can’t stop that shit, so you might as well continue the ride.”
I hadn’t thought about marriage in such a long time. I never saw myself getting married because the men were shitty. Not saying I’d jump at the chance, but I do sometimes think about me walking down the aisle to Rayzor and that scared me.
Words always seem to fail me, but my heart didn’t. Things between us had been going at lightspeed. Sometimes I lay in bed at night letting my thoughts settle, but they never do. It isn’t until I tell myself to let go that they slow down.
“I don’t want to get the kids hurt. You can continue loving them, but please don’t take them through the ringer because this ain’t the fight you’ll win with me.”
“That’s a heavyweight I’m willing to lose. Just let us coast and like I told you before, everything’s good.”
We got up from our rest and joined everyone else.
I felt light like the luckiest woman in the world.
“Rhea ain’t here yet?” Suki asked.
“Nope.” I shrugged.
“I talked to her earlier and she said she’s coming.”
“Me too, but even I had reservations about it. Didn’t like her tone. I thought we were good because we’ve talked.”
“She’s just late, that’s all. Don’t count our girl out.”
“How can you be late to a cookout? Either she’s coming or not.”
Suki left the situation alone, and I put it to the back of my mind after a minute or two. I had half the mind to text her to see where she was but threw that out because she knew what today was and knew the address to my house.
Hours passed, I was tipsy and feeling giddy as my man teased me on text messages about the things he wanted to do to me. I almost left our company outside to go handle it, but he wanted to see how long I could hold out.
I was having the time of my life.
The house began clearing out, and Levi was in bed. Erin had a few of her friends spending the night so all the adults were outside playing cards, listening to music.
“See, I told you they were still here,” Rhea entered with some man.
The eerie quietness that came over the backyard. The music faded. You could hear a rat piss on the grass. Suki looked at me, I looked at her and she shook her head.
“Oh, so you do know the address?” I retorted.
“Girl, please. I told you I was coming. I had some things to do, but I’m here now.”
I suppressed the urge to curse her ass out because the way the liquor had me in a ‘don’t give a fuck’ mood, I let it slide.
“Foods in the kitchen,” Suki let her know.
Rhea’s feet didn’t move. She stared at the table for a minute before grabbing dude’s hand and dragging him inside.
The table chatter started as I carefully watched them through the window of the kitchen.
“What the fuck was that about? And who the fuck is that?” Suki asked.
Upwardly, I rolled my eyes. “Your guess is good as mine.”
“Y’all don’t know who that nigga is?” Rayzor asked.
“Nope,” I responded.
He pushed up from the seat.
“Rayzor.”
He glared at me.
“Nah, fuck that. You know every mothafucka in here. That’s violation to bring an unknown mothafucka where your people lay their heads at.”
Before I could utter another word, he was stalking into the house. Fire grew under my ass as I went to follow behind him. Suki was on my heels as the rest of the table followed behind us.
Rhea was engrossed with him, feeding him.
“Aye, you can stay, but you gotta dip,” Rayzor told them.
She dropped the spoon of beans back on the plate.
“Excuse me. First, this is Erin’s house,” Rhea argued.
“I don’t give a fuck who’s house it is. Erin don’t know this mothafucka.”
“Aye, dawg, I know you’re trying to take up for the house and shit, and I don’t mean know disrespect, but get my name so you can stop calling me mothafucka,” the guy said.
“Eris, you’re going to let him talk to me like that.”
I stepped to the front. “Like what?”
“Oh, so you’re deaf now? You’re letting him handle your friends any kind of way.”
“What the hell are you talkin’ about, Rhea? He has a point. You didn’t tell me you were bringing anybody. He’s a stranger and I got kids in here. I don’t know him.”
“Wow. Really? You think I’m just going to bring somebody around that moves like that.”
Folding my arms, “I don’t know. You tell me,” I said, snaking my neck.
“Yeah, this nigga got you losing your mind,” she mumbled.
“Why the fuck do you keep bringing him up?”
“Because, bitch–”
“Bitch?!” I leaped because who the fuck was she talking to?
“Yeah, bitch. You’ve been getting out of your body behind some dick that you were supposed to leave in Miami.”
“Oh, that’s what this about? You must’ve wanted the dick and got mad I got it first.”
“Girl, bye. I don’t want Rayzor. Half the fucking city done bounced on that dick. My problem ain’t with him. It’s with you. Ever since you’ve been around him, you’re moving funny towards the ones that’s been there for you.”
“Rhea, now you’re going below the fucking belt. Eris talks to us and sees us the same amount as she did before,” Suki interjected.
“No, it’s the same for y’all. Not me and her.”
“Don’t fucking do that bitter ass shit, Rhea,” Suki argued.
“Bitter? Since when is the truth bitter? I could’ve sworn we was just talking about this.”
I was flabbergasted. Hurt even. I almost slapped both their asses.
“Oh, so y’all hoes talking about me behind my back?”
“E, wait,” Suki interjected. “Rhea, why the fuck you starting shit?”
“I had a good time tonight, but everybody get the hell outta my house!” I yelled, walking away, heading toward my room. Rayzor could clean house because if I stayed around their asses too much longer, it’ll be furniture moving.