Chapter 9 #2
“But they are good for depression. I can hear a child laugh, and it makes my heart swell with happiness. You should try it sometimes. It’s the best thing ever.
Not even drugs make me feel as good as a child will.
That’s why I’m planning on having about a dozen of them with Reagan.
You can have our marriage annulled all you want, but it won’t stop us from having children and having a happy life together.
” She said that she forbade it again. “Like I said, I don’t care what you do about us being married.
We’ll just be happy together anyway that we can, no matter what you have to say about it. ”
“I loath you.” That made her laugh, and she wasn’t quite sure why. “You’re nothing to me but a pain in my ass. I hate the very air that you breathe in and out of that skinny body of yours.”
“As much as I hate to agree with you on this, I don’t much care for you either.
You’ve manipulated me enough as far as I’m concerned.
I think that my own depression would be manageable if you weren’t around to trigger me.
” She said that she triggered her first, and that was final.
“I don’t know if you realize this or not, but people can trigger each other.
That’s why I don’t understand why you want me to live with you so badly. Neither one of us would survive it.”
“I want you with me so that you can see how much I suffer with you around.” She told her that it didn’t make any sense.
“It does too. You should see how much I have to suffer daily just to be able to live in this world. No matter what I do, I just can’t get you to be in line with my way of thinking, and I’m sick of it. ”
“I don’t like your way of thinking.” Robin picked up a pillow and put it on her face.
She knew what she was doing; she did the same thing when she was out with her.
Screaming into a pillow so that no one could hear her.
“What? Are you afraid that people will hear you being depressed? I would think this is the perfect place to let others know when you’re depressed.
You certainly have no trouble making sure I know when you are. ”
With the pillow back on the chair, she looked like she had everything under control.
Blake just stared at her. Making it so that she had to make the first sound between them.
She didn’t care if she had to sit all night with her; she wasn’t going to say a word until she did.
When her eyebrow started twitching, she knew that it was only a matter of seconds before she began sounding off again.
Telling her that she was more depressed than she was.
“You have no idea what I suffer.” She told her that she certainly told her enough that she knew. “You just don’t know what it is to have to suffer like I do.”
“You said that twice. Was that for my benefit, or have you begun repeating yourself like someone who doesn’t remember what they said?
I think they have a title for that disease as well.
You might be coming down with something altogether different than depression.
Have you thought of that?” She said that she hated her again.
“I don’t care anymore, Robin. I really don’t.
I have a good life for myself, and I’m going to live it the best that I can.
You might feel better if you find someone to date once in a while.
Though I don’t know how that would work out for you.
You’re just too mean to have anyone around you for more than an hour or so. ”
“I’m not mean, I’m depressed.” She again didn’t say anything but watched her sister. “You’re triggering me right now, and I don’t care for it. I’m going to be in a black place soon, and you have no idea what I can be up to when I get in that sort of mood.”
“You’ve told me about your moods all the time.
I think that I can pick them out from you without any trouble.
” She told her to go away. “Gladly. I would also like to inform you that I’m not coming here again.
And I know for a fact that they’re not going to release you until you have a doctor who will see you.
I have a feeling that you’re going to be having your mail delivered here before you find someone that wants to put up with you. ”
Blake stood up, and her sister raised her chin.
Before she said anything else, she was on her way to the nurses’ station to tell them that she was leaving.
Apparently, Robin couldn’t be left alone for very long, or she caused trouble with the other patients.
She was on her way out the door when she saw Reagen.
He was just what she needed in someone waiting for her, and she hugged him tightly when she was cleared from the doors.
“I have you.” She nodded, unable to say anything beyond the lump in her throat. “She won’t hurt you again. Not so long as I have blood in my body.”
“Don’t go to prison.” He laughed, and she told him that she wasn’t kidding.
“She’ll drive you batty until you have to be your tiger and hurt her, and then how will I have those babies.
And with that, I want you to know that I want to have a child right away.
I want to hear their laughter all the time, and that will make me feel better.
I want to love them like my sister never loved me, too. ”
“Whatever you want, love, I’m here for you.” The two of them walked hand in hand out of the hospital, and she felt better than she had before. Just having someone love her was more than she ever hoped for in her life. And having Reagan in her life was like having all the blessings in the world.
~*~
Farley was enjoying his class this year.
The students were eager to learn, and they were fun as well.
He thought that teaching third grade was the best there was.
They were learning all kinds of things that kept their attention, and he loved the fact that they asked questions of him when they didn’t understand.
First graders were like that. Afraid to ask too many questions for getting into trouble.
He was ready to get started when the first bell rang.
“All right, class. Let’s get started. Who wants to check the backpacks to make sure that they’re all hung up well?
” He picked one person from the full class of hands being raised.
“Once that is done, we’ll go over the spelling words from yesterday.
Remember, there will be a test on Tuesday, and if you pass it, you don’t have to take the one on Friday. ”
“Mr. Farley, my momma said that I can do them all right at home, so I don’t need to take the test on Tuesday.
” He said that everyone took the test, no matter how well they did at home.
“She’s not going to be happy with you. She said that taking the test stresses me out.
I think she does the stressing, but I’m not allowed to say that to her anymore. ”
“No, that would be rude.” He had to stifle a laugh when he thought of the conversation that would be going on tonight at Benji’s home.
“I’ll send a note home with you to make sure she understands that we all take the tests at the same time here in the classroom so that I can tell that you’re learning when you need to be. ”
“All right, but that’s going to be hard on me.
” He did smile this time and told Benji that his mother could call and talk to him when she wanted questions answered.
“I’ll tell her, but she’s working a lot nowadays, and she might not be able to come in.
I told her that I don’t mind taking the test, I usually do really good on it anyway, but she said that I’m her little boy and that she says what’s going to happen to me. I don’t want to cause any trouble.”
“You’re not.” He wanted to tell Benji that his mother was, but didn’t.
He didn’t want to put the little boy in the middle of things, and that would be just what he would do if he voiced what he wanted to.
“We’ll go over the words now, and then tomorrow we’ll take the pre-test. Has everyone studied them? ”
Again, a room full of hands went up, and he was glad to know that they’d been studying.
As he was going over the words, he noticed that Megan was sleeping with her head down on her desk.
That had been happening a lot lately, and he wondered what was going on at home.
As soon as he had a break, he was going to make a phone call to her home.
It might be a simple thing that she wasn’t sleeping well and needed to get some extra sleep at school.
By lunchtime, he and the kids had gone over not just their spelling words but their math homework as well.
He was glad that things were progressing well for them.
He was happy, too, with the results that he was getting from them.
He realized that they were taking the class homework seriously, and that made him feel good about the way he was teaching.
Just as the kids were going down to the cafeteria for lunch, he heard from his brother Darius.
“I’ve been wanting to have dinner with you for about a week now. How about tonight we meet up at the burger joint and pig out?” He told him that it sounded great. “Good. I’ve been feeling a little down lately and have been needing to get together with someone for weeks.”
“I’m sorry to hear that. I’ve had a really good day and thought that tomorrow was going to be even better.” He called him a dork. “It takes one to know one.” The two of them laughed, and he was happy that he’d be able to see him tonight.
Making arrangements to meet up, he was glad that he’d talked to him. It was going to be fun to get together with his brother. They didn’t see each other all that much as they both had good teaching jobs.