Sixteen
CHAPTER
My eyes fluttered open. Where… am I? My head was pounding, and every breath took far more effort than I would have liked it to.
My body ached. The ceiling wasn’t marble, but moonstone with walnut paneling I had not seen before.
My brow furrowed, and I slowly turned my head to the left where I saw a familiar set of bright cerulean eyes staring back at me.
Those eyes were Mateo’s. What’s he doing here?
“Hey… hey there, Sunshine.” His voice was soft.
“You’re awake. It took you long enough. I was beginning to wonder if you were ever going to.
” He uncrossed his arms, leaning in closer to me.
“How are you feeling? You gave us all quite the scare, you know.” He reached for me, and I flinched.
Mateo pulled away and held his hands up to prove he meant no harm.
Recrossing his arms, his expression softened.
There was so much pity in those sad eyes.
“Where am I exactly?” I asked, barely able to make a sound with how dry my throat was.
“Realm of Stars. Zathrian’s home, if you want the specifics. One of his guest rooms, actually. You’re safe here.” Quietly scooting his chair closer to my bedside, closer than before, he still kept his distance.
“And why am I here?” I paused. “I don’t—I don’t want to be here.” Attempting to sit up, my whole body shook, making it almost impossible. Tears formed in the corners of my eyes. Everything hurt so much. Not just my mind, or my body, but my soul.
“Woah, woah. Easy, Aerilyn. Lay down, please, you need your rest. You aren’t fully healed. Just let me explain, please.” His hand came forward to gently guide me back against the fluffy, navy pillow beneath me.
A shaky breath parted from my lips, accepting defeat, too weak to do so otherwise. “Okay,” I replied meekly.
“Please, just hear me out, okay?” Mateo began.
“Acheron brought you here. He had no other choice. There was nowhere else to go. We were never against you. I know, uhm, he told you otherwise, but we didn’t know about Gelia and Neil’s plans.
I… we… we were never the bad guys. And I know you don’t want to be here, and you don’t trust Zathrian or any of us, but you can’t go over the Wall.
You’re one of us now. Acheron told me what happened, and I am so sorry that you…
” He paused, not wanting to put salt on fresh wounds, nor speak of what he could only assume happened in the Realm of Nightmares based on my condition.
I wonder what Acheron told them, and why.
“What I mean to say is, we welcome you here with open arms. You are safe. No harm will come to you here.”
“Zathrian lied to me, too. He’s no different than them and neither are you,” I mumbled.
“I know he—we did,” he replied. “But he means well, just… Please give us… him a chance. That is all I ask of you. It’s more than just quarreling between the Realms; it’s the balance of them that’s at stake.”
I bit the inside of my cheek.
“Please.” He breathed, his composure wavered.
Why does he seem so worked up when the last time I saw him, he called me a pet and I threw food at his face?
Why does he not hate me? “We have all been worried about you since we heard what Neil and Casimir had done. We didn’t know.
If we had, then we would’ve come for you sooner.
I can’t imagine… I am so sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings when I teased you all those times, either. I’m sorry, I—” The door creaked open.
Turning toward the sound, there he was. In a loose-fitted navy and silver shirt, stood Zathrian. His hair was disheveled, like he hadn’t slept in days. Tray in hand, he looked to Mateo, then to me, and back at Mateo before gesturing for him to leave.
Mateo stood up without a word and headed toward the door, mumbling something I couldn’t make out before he left. Simultaneously, Zathrian entered and took the seat Mateo had sat in. He set the tray down on the nightstand beside the bed.
“How are you holding up? Can I get you anything? I brought you something to eat.” His tone was gentle, unlike any tone I had ever heard him use before.
“I’m not hungry,” I muttered, turning my head away from him. Taking into consideration what Mateo had said and maintaining that I would rather be anywhere but here, I still uttered, “Thank you, though.”
The room was silent for a few moments but for the sound of our breathing. When I turned back to him, Zathrian slid his hand through his dark curls a few times. “I’m sorry, Aerilyn, I truly am.” He sounded sincere, and for a second, I almost believed him. Liar.
I clenched my jaw, staring right back at his stupid face. Those bright blue eyes of his and that chiseled jawline. I blinked, sharply diverting my eyes elsewhere. I didn’t want to think about it, and I didn’t want to think about him, either.
“Yeah.” I slid my right arm over my face to cover my eyes.
He hesitated. I could tell he wanted to say something else, but he refrained.
A sigh parted from my lips. Existence was pain.
“Are you feeling okay?” he asked. “You’ve been out for a few days.”
My best friend isn’t actually dead and is the Mate of the man I have been in love with.
Who is guilty by affiliation for the death of my father, whose decapitated head haunts me in my dreams, and who let the High Lord of the Realm of Nightmares torture me for however long.
He also lied to me all this time, stole my first kiss, my virginity, and my first love. I’m peachy. Just peachy.
“I’m okay, all things considered,” I replied instead.
Zathrian nodded. He reached out, hesitating the moment I flinched on instinct.
Our eyes met. He froze, his hand hovering for a moment or so.
He moved slowly, pushing one of my loose curls out of my face.
His touch was warm and gentle, how Neil’s used to be, but different at the same time.
Once the curl was pushed from my face, he fell backward, slumping against the chair.
“He is a cruel, cruel being,” he said, presumably referring to Neil.
So are you.
“I didn’t know about Gelia when Acheron told us about what happened.
I was just as shocked as you were. I never met Gelia personally.
Before, I mean. I really didn’t know. All those years, and I never knew that she was under my nose the whole time.
I was there to prevent a war when they were the ones trying to create one in the first place.
It was a setup, the whole thing. I am sorry you got dragged into all of this.
What they did to you. And your father. I promise when you’re feeling better, I will explain everything. ”
Liar.
I clenched my jaw to the point my molars were bound to crack. The image of my father’s decapitated head appeared in my memory. Don’t cry, don’t cry, don’t cry.
“Take me home,” I choked out.
He shook his head. “You and I both know I can’t do that. The Mortal Realm is no place for you now. The Realm of Stars is your home now. You will learn to love it, as the Gods above would not guide you here if they did not want you here.”
“Acheron brought me here,” I hissed, implying that this wasn’t the doing of the Gods. I swallowed hard, and a silent tear trickled down my face. I felt lost, broken, alone.
“Why did you lie to me?” I asked.
“Aerilyn.” His voice softened.
“Why did you lie to me?” Our eyes locked on one another.
“I didn’t want to.” He breathed.
“But you did,” I whispered.
“Because I had no other choice.” His voice cracked.
“You had a choice, and you chose to lie to me.” My breath hitched.
“Please, just give me the chance to explain and make things right. But for now, you need rest. You are not fully healed. Despite our accelerated healing, shadow magic takes longer to heal regardless of how many stardust-infused potions we use. Please, just rest for now, okay?” he begged.
My body felt so weak. I wanted to run, but I knew I couldn’t. And I had nowhere else left to go.
After several moments of silence, I rolled my eyes. “Fine.”
Zathrian smiled, a genuine smile. Not that I cared, or anything like that.
“Thank you,” he said softly.
“Yeah, yeah,” I muttered. “Just leave me alone.”
He sighed. “Alright. Mateo is still posted to keep an eye on you. If you need anything, let us know.” He rose from his seat, and as he approached the door with his back turned to me, he stopped and looked over his shoulder. “Do eat when you feel up to it. It’ll help you gain your strength back.”
“I will think about it if you bring me Shepherd’s pie,” I said, half-joking.
He smirked, nearly chuckling. “Glad to see your humor hasn’t left you, or your love for Shepherd’s pie. I am still cleaning it off my walls, in case you were curious,” he quipped, pausing momentarily. “I will make arrangements.” Then he left me alone in the quietness of this room.
I stared at the ceiling, taking a shaky breath and feeling the void in my chest where my heart once was.
Accepting that regardless of how I felt, the Gods above had a plan, one that I had to trust. There had to be some sort of reason for all of this.
I could only pray that this heartache wouldn’t last forever.
The door opened again, and when I turned to see who was there, I saw Mateo. He approached my bedside, but too tired to care, I closed my eyes.
Quietly, he whispered, “Dream sweet dreams.” The comfort of magic engulfed me. Sleep found me rather quickly. This time, there were no nightmares, just dreams of Shepherd’s pie.