1. Chapter 1
one
Nightmare - True North
Dimitri was a giant sack of shit.
He knew it.
He felt it.
He was a giant sack of shit.
A beautiful woman was riding him. A woman so beautiful that he had hit on her the first chance he got. So beautiful, he’d wondered why she was someone’s secretary when she could be in magazines.
Her inner walls clenched around him, her orgasm seconds away.
And he was thinking about his girlfriend.
The other girlfriend, that is.
Talia’s moans hitched as the orgasm hit. Dimitri watched, trying to force himself to enjoy the sensation of her tightening around him, but he couldn’t stop thinking about Jackie.
He’d tried. Really, he had. But sex with Talia was different from sex with Jackie. She was softer, gentler than Jackie. Equally a tease, but she preferred a more tender touch that Dimitri wasn’t used to anymore since being with Jackie.
And Jackie’s nightmares had only grown worse over the last few weeks. The rush of the holidays had left her exhausted enough to finally settle into restful sleep each night. But as life settled around them again, her mind had returned to being her worst enemy.
Talia fell to the bed beside him, and Dimitri’s gaze followed her despite the almost bored expression on his face.
“Your head’s not in the game,” she sighed. Dimitri wished he could disagree.
“I know,” he sighed back. “I’m sorry. I’m a piece of shit.”
“Thinking about Jackie?” Talia asked before he could say so. He nodded. “I think you might be a little less into this triad situation than you let on,” she teased.
He turned to face her, his brows pinched together. “No, that’s not it, I promise.” He hesitated before continuing, “Jackie’s nightmares keep getting worse. I couldn’t wake her up last night. All I could do was watch as she thrashed and begged Theo to stop and get off of her.”
Talia shivered. He was usually able to wake Jackie out of the nightmares.
She would often be in tears by the time he did, but he’d hold her tight against him, reminding her that she was safe.
The previous night had been different, though.
When he pulled her close, she had bucked and thrashed until he was worried about both of them getting hurt.
Tears had fallen despite her lids remaining closed, and he’d had to watch while she begged the Theo in her dream to stop whatever he was doing to her.
The way she pushed off her hips, he had an idea, and it made him sick to his stomach every time he thought about it.
“I’ve noticed they’ve become more frequent whenever I stay over,” Talia admitted, her cheek resting on her fist. She reached out her free hand, squeezing Dimitri’s bicep gently. “At least the therapist starts next week. Hopefully that helps.”
“Yeah,” he agreed, though his mind remained elsewhere, worried about whether or not Jackie would sleep that night without him there.
Talia gripped his arm again, drawing his attention back to her. “Do you want to call her? To check in?”
He blew some air harshly out of his nose. “I’d love to, but she will rip me a new one if she finds out how distracted I am by her while I’m supposed to be enjoying my time with you.”
Talia hawked a laugh, her head tilting back to expose her neck. “True.” She remained staring at the ceiling. “Maybe we could leave early tomorrow morning and check in on her on our way to work instead then.”
Dimitri rolled, his teeth gently grazing the long column of her throat before he said, “Good idea.” He lowered himself on her body until he settled between her legs. “I’m sorry I’ve been so distracted tonight. Let me make it up to you.”
The TV was on when Dimitri and Talia entered Jackie’s condo.
Dimitri shrugged out of his jacket, signalling to Talia to stay quiet, before pointing at Jackie, asleep on the couch.
The living room lights were dim, but still bright enough that they would have felt bright in the dark of night.
The TV volume was turned low, clearly left on to keep some ambient noise in the room.
Jackie wasn’t covered, though, suggesting she’d fallen asleep watching something.
Whether she’d started on the couch or come out after a nightmare, Dimitri intended to find out.
He rounded the couch to squat next to Jackie, sweeping her hair off her brow to get a look at her face.
Despite the dark circles under her eyes, she looked peaceful, easing some of the tension in his shoulders.
“Jacks, baby, wake up,” he said gently, still stroking her hair.
She stirred, batting his hand away. A smile crept across his face.
“Maybe we should let her sleep,” Talia suggested.
“Unless the building is on fire, or someone is dead, she would agree,” Jackie said groggily, before rolling away from Dimitri to face the back of the couch. She turned back, scowling and asked, “Why are you two here?”
“Just checking in,” Dimitri confessed. Jackie’s scowl deepened at him. “Why are you asleep on the couch?” he asked, despite his better judgment.
“I must have fallen asleep watching TV.” She shrugged before sitting up. Dimitri didn’t believe her for a second, given her quick, tight response. “I’m going to shower. I’ll see you both at work.”
She slunk away to the bathroom, her words a dismissal that felt like a punch to Dimitri’s gut.
“Are you going to stay?” Talia asked from the door. Dimitri turned to her, a hand pulling anxiously through his hair.
“Yeah,” he said, walking toward the kitchen. “I’m going to make sure she eats something. You want to stay and help me cook for her?”
Talia hummed softly. “As tasty as that sounds, the twins just got back from a job yesterday, and I have several hours of encrypting ahead of me. So, I’ll see you at work.”
Dimitri nodded, though he felt like there was some lingering tension between them. “I’m sorry about last night. I know I’ve not been much of a boyfriend to you since we started this whole triad thing. I’m going to try to make it up to you, though.”
“Her needs are greater than mine right now,” Talia dismissed. “And besides, I think of us as more like friends with benefits than actual boyfriend and girlfriend.”
A weight sank deep in Dimitri’s chest at that.
The gentle rejection felt unsettling. But when he considered how much deeper his affection for Jackie ran, even though he and Talia had been exploring their feelings for almost two months, he realized that maybe being just friends with benefits was for the best. It took the pressure off being a good boyfriend to two women.
She smiled, seeing acceptance wash over him. “I’ll see you two later.”
She left, leaving Dimitri feeling a little lighter despite the darkness he could feel creeping in.
Jackie halted in place after shutting off the shower. She could hear something sizzling on the stove when she expected to be left alone. She wrapped herself in a towel and made her way toward the kitchen to see who had hung back.
Dimitri stood at the espresso maker, pouring steamed milk over a cup full of ice.
“I thought you’d left with Talia,” she said, leaning against the fridge as she watched him. He turned, his eyebrows high before giving her a long, leering look down her legs and back up again.
“I wanted to make you breakfast.” He set her iced latte on the counter next to a steaming plate of over-easy eggs with crispy cheese, avocado and chilli oil on toast—her favourite.
“You wanted to check up on me,” she called out before settling into the seat and breaking into her egg yolk.
Dimitri chuckled and turned to plate his own breakfast. “How’d you sleep?”
“Don’t start,” she countered through a mouth full of food.
He settled in next to her at the island.
“Your mouth can lie to me, or not talk to me at all if you want, but your eyes give you away, Jackie.” She pursed her lips, but Dimitri could tell she was pissed by how heavily she breathed through her nose.
“I know what Theo does to you in those dreams.” He spoke quietly into his plate.
“I hate that he’s still tormenting you from the grave. ”
Jackie pushed her food around a moment before speaking again. “My first session with Kendra is scheduled for next week.”
“Good,” he said, turning to her then. She finally looked up at him.
“I’m sorry I’m such a distraction. I hope it didn’t get in the way of your time with Talia.”
“It was her idea to come check on you this morning,” he admitted. Jackie opened her mouth to speak, visibly upset. He smiled again and gripped the back of her neck to pull her close and kiss her hair. “Finish your breakfast so I can eat you out before we go to work.”
“Did you make Talia breakfast and eat her out before coming here?” Jackie asked incredulously.
Dimitri grinned again. “You’d think having two girlfriends would tire a guy out, but I think it’s actually giving my jaw an even more chiselled look.” He gripped his jaw, offering Jackie his best smoulder.
She laughed heartily, and more tension eased in Dimitri’s chest. “You’re ridiculous.”
“The only thing that’s ridiculous is that you’re sitting there in a towel, fresh out of the shower and expected me to not want to eat you out. Hurry up and finish your eggs.”
Jackie’s laugh continued to fill the kitchen, though she kept working on her breakfast. Dimitri watched to make sure she finished everything on her plate before whisking her away to her bedroom.