16. Rae
16
RAE
Then
O ne of the first things I noticed about my room at Hunter’s place is how close it is to his bedroom. I loved that when the house was quiet and still I could strain my ears and hear him breathing or tossing and turning in his sheets. I loved that I could hear his five o’clock alarm and the creak of his floorboards that told me he was getting dressed for his morning run. I loved everything about it, but tonight, or more accurately, this morning, I despise our shared wall because it’s giving me a backstage pass to Indigo’s first night in his bed.
Usually, they sleep over at her place because, despite her initial friendliness, she doesn’t seem to be a huge fan of Will and I staying at Hunter’s place. Every week, she finds new ways to keep him away from the house, dragging him deeper and deeper into her world with little to no concern for reciprocation. I don’t know how Hunter talked her into coming over tonight, but I wish he hadn’t because then I wouldn’t be listening to this .
Her giggles of delight.
His low, rumbling tone that’s supposed to be for her but is speaking directly to the green-eyed monster living in my chest.Every time I see them together, or hear Hunter on the phone with her, all I can think is ‘that should be me.’ When I concocted my plan for the summer, I had a very specific vision for what things between Hunter and I would look like at this point, and Indigo wasn’t a part of any of it.
Nor was the belly-burning jealousy and irrational sadness I’ve been dealing with since the night of my graduation party. I thought I’d be able to soothe those emotional wounds by putting us in situations created specifically to spark Hunter’s desire, like the underboob tattoo and the kickback tonight with Cameron’s handsy ass, but so far, nothing’s worked. Every display of Hunter’s protective, possessive side is fleeting, so short-lived that I’m not entirely sure I’m not imagining them.
I turn over and sigh, sandwiching my head between a pillow in hopes of blocking them out. For one blissful moment, I think it’s working, but then Indigo snorts loudly at something Hunter said, and I’m left with no choice but to admit defeat. Sitting up, I grab the pillow and toss it at the wall.
“He’s not even that damn funny.”
“Right?” Dee adds from the other side of the bed. “I’ve never even heard him crack a joke, so she’s definitely putting on.”
“He makes jokes.”
“Girl!” She throws an arm over her eyes and lets out an exasperated sigh. “You have got to pick a struggle. Either you want me to agree that he has no sense of humor, or you want me to call him the next King of Comedy; there is no in-between.”
“Why can’t it be both?” I ask, snickering when her annoyance leads to her turning her back to me.
“Good night, Rachel.”
I roll my eyes. She knows I hate it when she calls me by my full name. “Are you really going to sleep, or are you just ignoring me?”
Her response comes in the form of a light snore that makes my jaw drop in disbelief. “Who falls asleep that fast?” I mutter, swinging my legs over the edge of the bed and grabbing my phone on my way out the door. When I step into the hallway, everything is quiet. I guess at some point during Dee and I’s short conversation Hunter and Giggles found something else to do besides work my last nerve. I check the time on my phone and see that it’s almost two in the morning, which means Will’s alarm will be going off soon.
He’s been picking up extra shifts at the factory to cover the growing cost of solving our mold problem, which means we haven’t been seeing a lot of each other. When I do see him, he looks tired. His features gaunt and his complexion flat. He’s lost weight, which I can only assume comes from him forgetting to pack food for his shifts. I pressed him about it a few days ago, and his excuses ranged from it not being a priority because he’s too tired to have an appetite to him just not having the time to do it.
Since he won’t let me contribute the little money I have in my savings to help with the house expenses, I’ve taken it upon myself to make sure he’s nourished while he works himself to the bone.
I move down the stairs quickly and quietly, hoping to be done with Will’s lunch by the time he comes down. A few of the lights are still on, which doesn’t surprise me because Hunter always does that on nights when Will has to work, but what does surprise me is the fact that I’m not on the first floor alone.
Hunter is posted up against the counter by the sink, drinking a glass of water like he does every night before he goes to bed. We stare at each other for a long moment, and even though he looks good as fuck in the black tank and short combination I’ve come to think of as his uniform, I’m not all that glad to see him.
“Hey,” he says, all casual and unbothered like he hasn’t played a role in turning this night into a total shit show. First, by manhandling one of my guests—poor Cameron probably needs a neck brace—and then by making me an unwilling listener to the soundtrack of his and Indigo’s nighttime routine.
I don’t respond. I just make my way over to the cabinet where Will keeps his lunchbox and attempt to pull it down. My fingertips graze the end of the handle, but I fail to free the container from its perch on the highest shelf. I curse under my breath, wondering who put it all the way up there in the first place.
“Here, let me.” Hunter comes up behind me, his broad chest and toned stomach brushing against my back and ass as he reaches up and makes light work of retrieving the stupid thing. He sets it on the counter and moves away, gone as quickly as he came.
“I could have gotten it,” I say, lying right through my teeth even though we both know the truth.
“Sure, you could have.” He places his abandoned glass in the sink and gives me a look that ensures I know he’s being sarcastic.
“What’s with you today?! You just keep butting into situations that no one asked you to be a part of.”
Hunter pulls a face. “You’re not seriously mad at me for kicking your little friends out, are you?”
“No, Hunter, I just loved seeing you manhandle my company just to turn around and snuggle up with your little girlfriend for the rest of the night.” I turn to the fridge, yanking it open and pulling out the leftover steak he grilled earlier, not caring if he was saving it for him or Giggles. “I absolutely adore double standards.”
He scoffs. “The only standards you should be worried about are yours.”
“Mine?” I arch a brow. “What’s wrong with my standards?”
“They’re too low.”
Now, I’m the one scoffing, tossing random items into Will’s lunchbox without looking to see what any of it is. “ My standards are low? Have you looked at your girlfriend lately?”
I expect him to take me to task for the stray bullet I’ve just sent flying in Indigo’s direction, but he doesn’t. Instead, he moves right past it, aiming his own verbal bullets at Cameron.
“Your high school sweetheart tried to undress you in front of everyone, including me.” Something dark and dangerous passes behind his eyes. “He clearly doesn’t respect you.”
“Maybe I don’t want to be respected, Hunter. Did you ever think of that?” His lips part, but no words come out, and I let out a vicious laugh in the face of his dumb founded expression. “It actually hasn’t, huh?” I cackle again, unable to contain myself because I’ve just stumbled on an answer to a question I’ve been asking myself for weeks now. “You know what your problem is, Hunter? You think I’m a kid that needs your protection and guidance. You think I’m some helpless little girl with no desires or needs, which is laughable considering I was nineteen when we met.”
Nineteen and a virgin, but still.
I don’t even realize I’ve crossed the room to put my annoyance right in his face until I feel his breath on my lips, until I can taste the mint from his toothpaste and smell the alcohol from his mouthwash.
He glares down at me with dark, exasperated eyes. “I don’t see you as a little girl, Rae,” he whispers on an exhale. “I’m fully aware of the fact that you’re a grown woman who can make her own choices and her own mistakes.”
“Then treat me like it.”
The air between us is thick and filled with heat. I wonder if Hunter knows that I’ve just issued a challenge to him, that those five words are as close as I’ll probably ever get to asking him for what I really want. His eyes drop to my lips, and I lick them, preparing for a moment that won’t ever happen.
“Act like one,” he returns, and maybe it’s just my imagination, but I swear I hear Hunter’s own answering challenge in his response. Just the thought has me inching closer until my breasts are pressed into the top of his stomach and I can see his pulse start to pound. Until my stomach is brushing against the bulge in his shorts and my sex is clenched with anticipation of desires that won’t be fulfilled.
Hunter feels everything I feel, but he doesn’t step back, and he doesn’t tell me to stop. He just stands there, a large and imposing figure casting a shadow over my body and my doubts. I lift up on my tip toes and hold myself there for a long second, more than enough time for him to see the intention in my eyes and change his mind.
He blinks, eyes low and hooded, and I lunge forward, taking a chance. The second our lips collide, Hunter’s hands are at my waist. He lifts me up, suspending my body in the air like I weigh nothing, and I try to wrap my legs around him, but he won’t allow it. I can’t bring myself to care, though, because I’m kissing him, and he’s kissing me back with all the fervor and passion I knew he would give me.
Our tongues crash together, and I moan into him, putting my hands around his neck so I can pull him closer. He comes willingly, turning his head to the side to get a better angle. In my mind, past the layers of surprise and delight, I curse because he’s so fucking good at this. I want to spend the rest of my life kissing him.
The tell-tale creak of Will’s door opening echoes through the house, breaking the silence around us and forcing Hunter and I’s mouths apart. We’re both panting when we pull away, and I want to smile because it was everything I thought it would be, but he’s frowning, so I hold my giddiness close like a secret.
Hunter lowers me to the floor slowly, and I’m just getting my bearings, settling myself on the other side of the kitchen, far away from Hunter, when Will appears, looking just as worn out as he did when he went to sleep.
He rubs at bleary eyes and looks between me and Hunter. “Um, good morning?”
“I packed your lunch!” I chirp, forcing a smile as I hold the lunchbox up as proof.
Will walks over and gives me a peck on the cheek. “I already told you you don’t need to do that, Rae.”
“I know, but I wanted to.”
“I’m heading up to bed,” Hunter grunts, leaving the room before Will or I have a chance to respond.
“What was that about?” Will asks, staring at the doorway Hunter just passed through.
I bite my lip, my mind on the kiss and how he wanted it just as badly as I did. “I have no idea.”