Chapter 23
Chapter Twenty-Three
Ryan
"Ryan..." A girl burst through the door.
She'd grown so much taller in four years—nearly up to my shoulder now. Plain dress, shoulder-length hair, her features had lost that baby roundness. But those eyes, full of trust and need—they were exactly the same.
She threw herself into my arms, wrapped tight around my waist.
"I waited four years... I thought I'd never see you again..."
"I'm sorry..." My voice broke. "Rose, I'm so sorry..."
"Why did you leave?" Tears blurred her face. "Did I do something wrong? I've been trying so hard, I've been getting better..."
Every word cut into me like a blade.
"It wasn't your fault, sweetheart." I wiped the tears from her cheeks. "It was never your fault."
"Then why—"
"Mommy?"
A small voice interrupted us. Pedro had taken off his headphones and walked over.
"Mommy, why are you crying?"
I quickly wiped my eyes and crouched down, one arm around Rose, the other pulling Pedro close.
"Pedro," I steadied my voice, "this is Rose. She was my student."
Then I turned to Rose. "This is Pedro. My son."
Shock flooded her eyes. They darted between me and Ronan. But she didn't ask. She just touched her chest, then crouched down to Pedro's level.
"Hi, Pedro. How old are you?"
Pedro hid behind me, peeking out. "Three and a half."
"Three and a half. That's cool." Rose smiled. "What do you like?"
Pedro didn't answer. Rose didn't push it. She pulled a chocolate from her pocket and held it out.
Pedro's eyes lit up. He looked at me. I nodded. He snatched the chocolate and popped it in his mouth. "Thank you."
Ten minutes later, the two kids were huddled together.
Rose had found a conference brochure somewhere and was teaching Pedro how to fold paper airplanes.
She creased along the diagonal, pressed it flat.
Pedro squatted beside her, watching intently, copying her clumsy movements.
When he finally produced a lopsided plane, he held it up and whipped around to me.
"Mommy! Look!"
"Amazing!"
Pedro giggled, then turned back to Rose. "Rose, look at my plane. Will it fly?"
"Let's find out."
The door cracked open. Marco's head appeared.
"Boss." He kept his voice low, speaking to Ronan. "Should I grab the kids something to eat?"
Ronan nodded. Marco nodded at me and ducked out.
I couldn't hold it together anymore. I turned and walked into the bathroom behind the lounge.
I twisted the faucet. Cold water gushed out. I cupped my hands, scooped up the water, and splashed it hard against my face. In the mirror, my eyes were red and swollen. With Ronan, I could steel myself. Refuse every plea. But with Rose, I couldn't do it.
This child had been my biggest burden. She no longer stayed silent like before—she could even crouch down and talk to a strange three-year-old. But I saw the carefully hidden anxiety still lurking in her eyes. And that was on me.
It took a long time before I could compose myself enough to return to the lounge.
Marco was back with fresh juice and ham sandwiches from god knows where.
The starving kids swarmed the food the second he set it down.
Rose helped Pedro get his straw in and peeled back the plastic wrap on his sandwich.
The two sat on the couch eating. Rose bit into her sandwich while telling Pedro about Luna.
"She's super cute." Rose gestured with her hands. "She's this big now. She can open doors, and she brings toys to my bed."
"Really?" Pedro's eyes went wide.
"Yeah. Luna can even do backflips!"
Pedro grabbed Rose's hand excitedly. "Can I see her?"
"Of course." Rose pulled out her phone. "I have videos."
Ronan sat down beside me. "I don't need an answer right now." His voice was low. "I don't expect one conversation to fix everything. But you see how things are."
I didn't look at him. My eyes stayed on the kids.
"For Rose's sake," he continued, "at least give me a chance."
The scales in my heart tipped violently.
"Mommy!" Pedro suddenly twisted around and shouted. "Rose says I can feed Luna! Can we go see Luna?"
I wanted to refuse. I didn't want to go back to that place.
But I remembered Pedro at preschool, using his fists to defend his dignity after being mocked for not having a father. I remembered him sitting at the dinner table, refusing to eat, lifting that face—identical to Ronan's—and asking me why everyone else had a daddy except him.
I had no right to sever Pedro's bloodline. I couldn't rob him of the chance to have a father.
"If there's time." I finally said.
"Yes!"
I turned to Ronan. "I'm not getting back together with you."
His hands clenched on his knees. But he didn't interrupt.
"I'll agree to let you visit Pedro in California as a friend. But three conditions."
"Go ahead."
"First. Pedro doesn't get anywhere near your world. Not the people, not the business."
Ronan nodded.
"Second. You don't take him out of California. He stays within my sight."
"Of course."
"Third." I paused. "The second I see any sign of danger—any at all—this deal's off. I'm taking Pedro and disappearing."
"And this time, you'll never find us."
Ronan's muscles tensed, then relaxed. His fingers tapped twice on his knee.
"I agree. All of it."
I looked at that face. Couldn't tell if his surrender was real or a strategy. But I was too drained to analyze it.
"Fine." I stood up. "That's enough for today."
I walked to the couch and scooped up Pedro. He was still discussing with Rose whether Luna liked belly rubs. Being interrupted made him squirm unhappily.
"Mommy, I want to play with Rose more."
"Tomorrow." I kissed his forehead. "Time to go rest."
"But—"
"Pedro. Be good."
He saw my expression and swallowed the rest. He stretched out his little hand and waved at Rose. "Bye! See you tomorrow!"
I shifted Pedro to my left arm and reached for my bag on the coffee table with my right. The second I bent down, a hand grabbed my wrist.
Rose. She held on tight.
"You're coming back, right?" She looked up at me. "You won't—you won't do what you did last time—"
She didn't finish the sentence. But I heard every word she didn't say.
I adjusted Pedro on my left arm, freed my right hand, and crouched down. Her hand still wouldn't let go.
"Rose." I gripped her hand back and looked straight into her eyes. "I'm not leaving without saying goodbye again."
"Promise."
"I promise. You'll see me tomorrow."