Chapter 16 Jacks
Jacks
It’s been two weeks since I last talked to Claire and I feel like shit, but I’m choosing to remain optimistic.
I’ll admit when she last texted me, I was a bit nervous.
She told me that she talked to Clay, and I immediately thought that she was going to say she was getting back with him, but then I remembered that wasn't what she wanted.
She just wanted to dish back some of the pain she felt to him, and it worked. But still, hearing him say that he missed her has me a bit on edge.
I just have to let it play out how it’s supposed to.
I’m leaving it to the universe, or whatever.
Or maybe I’ll just turn up my pre-game playlist that’s filled with hype songs so I can block out all the thoughts in my head.
Yeah, I like that much better. Most of the guys on the team listen to music to get pumped up before every game, including me.
A lot of them listen to rap and hype music, but I prefer songs that make me feel like I’m driving fast down the road with not a care in the world.
As my playlist plays through my AirPods, I feel Grant sit down next to me and pat me on the shoulder. “You ready for our first home game in two weeks?”
I nod at him. We haven't had great luck this season on the road. Most of our wins have come from home games. “I’m ready.”
“Is she gonna be here?” Grant knows everything, and even though he’s been struggling with Hads, he’s been here for me every day that’s passed without an answer from Claire. This guy is a forever friend for sure, and I know I’ll do the same for him if something goes wrong with Hads.
He’s the closest thing I have to a brother, and I have Grand Mountain to thank for that.
“I’m not sure.” I haven't seen her since that night Grant got drunk, so she could be skipping this game and not photographing it. I hope she didn't. I hope she’s here because even if I can just catch a glimpse of her, I know it’ll make me feel better.
“It’ll all workout, buddy. Now, let’s go kick some ass out there, okay?”
“Okay.”
We’re halfway into the second period, and I’ve been playing pretty well. Grant and I have stopped a few goals, and as I’m tracking the puck’s movement across the ice, I see blonde hair in my peripheral vision.
Is she here?
I focus back on the game, and I see Grant hip check one of the opposing players.
The puck wraps around the end of the rink, and I pass it down to one of my teammates to get it away from our net.
The play continues, and when I look up, I see the number 86 through the glass.
She’s got her camera to her face, but I can see the huge smile bursting from underneath it.
She knows that I saw her. Fuck, I’m so glad she’s here.
The next thing I know, I get body checked. Shit. Okay, I have to pay attention to the game or I’m going to be fucked. I reach over and grab Grant's hand as he lifts me up and we get back to the game.
As soon as the buzzer sounds to signal the end of the game, I practically rush over to the huddle so we can all leave as soon as possible. I want to talk to Claire before she leaves. I’m sure she has editing or homework to do, so I hope I can catch her.
Our coach lets us go and tells us all not to celebrate our win too hard, and I practically book it to the showers. I shake my hair out, wash my body the fastest I ever have, and as I start to change my clothes, I hear a commotion somewhere in the locker room.
“Barnes! Carter! Chill the fuck out!” Holt is screaming at them.
I’ve never heard him yell so loud. I drop the shirt that I was holding, and I head to where they’re at.
I only see a pile of people when I get to where I assume Grant and Ryan are.
I push through half of my teammates, and when I see Ryan on top of Grant about to swing at him, I grab Ryan’s arm and throw him off.
“Get the fuck out, Ryan.” Now I’m yelling, and all my teammates are staring at me.
I’m not a yeller, I don't normally raise my voice at people, but Ryan being a dick—especially to Grant—needs to stop now. He immediately gets up and leaves my line of vision. I see Holt go after him, probably going to give him a talk, or at least I hope that’s what he’s going to do. Ryan could use it.
I reach my hand down to where Grant resides on the floor, and he takes it.
I pull him up, and he doesn't say anything as he goes to his locker and grabs his shit, hurrying off to the showers. I throw my shirt on, grab my bag, and book it out of the locker room. I hope she’s still here. Please let her be here.
I look around the rink, and a few people say hi to me and pat me on the back, telling me how good of a game we played.
But all I can focus on is finding her. I’m looking all around and I don't see her. I’m about to give up hope when I see her leaning against the boards of the rink, camera in her hand, looking more beautiful than the first time I ever saw her in here.
Her eyes look up and she meets my gaze. Fuck.
I feel like I just got punched in the chest. She smiles and motions for me to come over, so I will my feet to move over to her, and when I stop before her, I realize that I can barely feel my legs.
Why am I suddenly so nervous? I run my hand through my hair a few times as I just stand next to her, absorbing as much of her space as I can.
She smiles at me again. “Hi.”
Don't get your hopes up. Do not get your hopes up. “Hi, gorgeous.”
“You guys played a good game. Nice win.”
“Thanks.” I pause, barely able to speak because of how nervous I am. Is she going to tell me her decision? Has she made it? Did I completely fuck everything up? Not knowing any of those answers is killing me right now. “So, how have you been?”
She’s fiddling with her rings. It’s good to know that she’s as nervous as I am. “I’ve been okay. Doing a lot of thinking and took some time for myself. It’s been nice.”
“Good. I’m glad. It’s what you deserved.”
The two of us just stand a few inches from one another.
She’s leaning against the glass of the rink while still wearing my jersey, and I’m fighting the urge to pick her up, throw her over my shoulder and never put her down.
I swear it’s been hours before she turns and walks away from me.
I find myself being disappointed because I think this means that she made her decision, and she didn't pick me. It’s fine. I knew this could happen, but—
Wait. What?
My eyes flashed to her as she was leaving, and something caught my eye. Claire’s still wearing my jersey, but now, instead of my last name being on it, it says something different.
Jacks’ Girlfriend. I can't stop the smile from beaming off my face, still not having moved from where I stand.
Claire turns around to look at me, a gleam in her eyes. “Do I need to wait for you to chase me or are you just going to stand there all slack jawed?” I reach her in a few strides, and before either of us can say another word, I grab her face and kiss her.
“I’ll always chase you, gorgeous. Always.”
Claire
“I’m holding you to that.” I smile up at him when I speak.
It took a week to get this jersey customized and I’ve been itching for this moment—him seeing me wear it.
He looked so damn shocked, which makes sense, I guess.
It has been a while since we’ve seen each other, and he probably thought my silence for two weeks meant something bad.
But now that I have him again, all feels right in the world.
But wait…do I have him?
As if he can read my thoughts, he asks me a question. “Does this mean that you made a decision?”
“I did.” My voice shakes as I feel his hands come to my shoulders, as if he’s steadying me. “I want us to be real, Jacks. I don't want to be fake anymore.”
He drops his head, as if in disbelief, and when he locks eyes with me again, they’re starting to mist. “Fuck. Thank God. I know I said I would support you either way, but I’m glad you chose us. I’m glad you’re trusting me with your heart, Claire.”
“I’ve trusted you the whole time. You’re just…
the best guy, Jacks. I feel lighter when I’m with you, and I want to feel like that all the time.
I thought it would be too quick, but I realized that I never felt even a fraction of this with Clay.
You kind of brought me back to life, in a way.
That’s dramatic, but I never knew being with someone could feel like this. ”
“Claire, ever since I saw you, you’ve taken my breath away.
You’ve barely left me head since I saw you that first day, and I can't believe how we finally got here, but shit, I wouldn't change it for the world.” My eyes start to well up, but I shove that down because I don't want to cry right now.
Especially not in public, where everyone can see me.
“You know you never even asked me…” I trail off, knowing that he knows what I’m talking about. My jersey might say girlfriend on the back of it, but he never asked me officially.
“Claire, do me the honor of being my girlfriend? For real this time.”
“For real this time, Jacks.” Just as I finish speaking, he grabs me by the waist and spins me around, as if he can't believe this is really happening. Before he sets me down, he throws me over his shoulder and walks us out of the rink. “You know I’m not going to run away from you, right? Or did you not just hear what I said to you a few seconds ago?”
“I’m not taking any chances, gorgeous. Plus, a pretty girl like you shouldn't have to walk. Especially after photographing us idiots all night.”
“Fine. But I’m not fighting you on this because I like the view of your ass.
” It looks good, and I’m not gonna complain about him carrying me because I can't stop smiling. This is real. Jacks and I are real. I’d known this was going to be the result for a whole week, but now that it’s official, I find myself wanting to scream it from the rooftops that Jacks Moore is my boyfriend. For real.
“Enjoy the view then. Am I taking you to your place, mine, or do you wanna go grab a bite?”
“Food sounds good right now. I forgot to grab a snack for during the game, so I’m starving.”
“Damn, no granola bar? You always have one of those on standby in your bag.” It’s so sweet how he knows that.
“Did you write that on your list about me, too?”
He suddenly stops where he was walking. “How’d you know about the list?”
“I saw it when you gave me your phone in the dining hall. Your contact notes had an ‘All Things Claire’ section.”
“And now you think I’m a creep.”
I laugh as he continues walking again. “No, I thought that was the sweetest thing ever.” He stills again before setting me on the pavement.
“I’m serious, Jacks. You barely knew me, but you wanted to remember all the little things about me, and about my peanut allergy. It was thoughtful of you, so thanks.”
He doesn't say anything, he just kisses me. And I feel the world still beneath us. This kiss feels different because it’s our first official kiss as a couple.
His whole body wraps me up—his scent, his wet hair falling in front of his face, his body pressed as close as he can get to mine.
He slips his tongue into mine, and when he pulls back, I find myself missing the contact, so I grab his hand and we continue walking forward.
Forward as a real couple.
We may have started as fake, but nothing about the path before us will be. It’s real, and I know the guy next to me is always going to remind me of that.