Chapter Four
Jude sat in Juliana’s drawing room in disbelief at all she shared, and in even more disbelief that he agreed to her request. He still wasn’t certain why he had.
Of course, he was a man who found a beautiful woman attractive and desirable.
And his notice of her was more attraction than he’d had in quite some time.
Hopefully, she hadn’t noticed the reaction his cock had to the notion of being with her, although that was the point of the arrangement.
But the whole affair would complicate his life.
It was enticing to think about bedding a woman for the pleasure of it and not only to evade his torment, but he couldn’t have her developing feelings for him.
He could never be a true suitor to her, and he wasn’t certain she might not grow to see him as such.
He knew he should have said no and walked away, but somehow he couldn’t. When she spoke of Lygon or any other man she may entertain, something else took over within him. He wouldn’t stand for any of the widow chasers of the ton to get their hands on her. Someone had to protect her, so why not him?
Sighing, he spoke again. “There must be rules.”
“Of course. I understand,” she replied. “This should be an agreeable arrangement for both of us. What did you have in mind?”
“There will be no feelings between us. I have no intention of marrying. Ever. This is purely for physical enjoyment for as long as it pleases us both.” It was imperative she understood that rule most of all.
She nodded. “I quite agree.”
He continued, “We shall begin slowly. I am still not convinced it is the right thing for me to take your virginity, but I can show you other things to give you a chance to decide if that should be enough.”
“I appreciate your concern,” she started, “but I ask that you let me decide what is best for me in that regard. But starting with other things gives me the chance to be certain of that decision, so I am in agreement. Is there anything else?”
She was going to be the death of him. He still couldn’t believe he agreed to such madness.
His cock fought against his breeches. He could not remember the last time he had such attraction and desire for a woman, and he didn’t want to contemplate anything about why that could be.
His experiences as of late were reduced to a mere matter of need to calm his broken soul.
Something primal within him caused his lust to surge, and he attempted to push aside the guilt that he was lusting after one of his dearest friends.
“We must keep this secret,” he said. “If anyone suspected anything had occurred between us, it would appear on every scandal sheet. That means I can’t be seen visiting your home. I must sneak in at night under the cover of darkness.”
She nodded. “I agree with all of your conditions.”
His cock refused to relent, which was unfortunate, since it would receive no release there in the lady’s drawing room in the middle of the afternoon. The hard line in his breeches was quite noticeable if she were to take notice.
“Very well,” he said.
“Might we begin now?” she asked suddenly. “I mean, you are already here, and surely there is something you might show me which could ease my need.”
Jude almost choked at her words. He recovered and shifted in his seat to adjust himself. The bulge had become increasingly more uncomfortable. “Um…Yes, there is. Are you certain?”
The wicked smile that formed on her face could have undone him. “I am certain.”
He swallowed hard. “You must lock the door.” What was he doing? He ought to call the whole thing off and then go home to masturbate before he made any other questionable decisions.
She rose to do as he said, and his gaze remained fixed on the sway of her hips when she moved and what treasures would lie beneath the fabric of her gown.
After she locked the door, she returned to stand before him.
“What should I do?” Any resolve he might have had to walk away from their agreement evaporated into thin air and he lost control of his remaining good sense.
“Have you ever touched yourself?” The mental images of her doing so did nothing to ease the ache between his thighs.
“Touched myself how? What do you mean?” she asked.
Jude didn’t feel confident in his ability to stand at that moment. He wasn’t sure he ever had the privilege of giving a woman their first climax, and it thrilled him far more than it should.
He patted his thighs. “Turn around and sit on my lap. I’m going to teach you how to pleasure yourself. You may find this knowledge suits your needs. If you don’t wish to continue after this, I will understand.” His cock, on the other hand, might not be so agreeable.
She did as he said and looked over her shoulder at him.
She was beautiful. If he were honest with himself, she was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen, and he wasn’t sure how he had never noticed it before.
He had never noticed how bright her blue eyes were looking at him through her long lashes, or how her light brown hair would fall to the middle of her back in waves if he were to release it, or how full her pink lips were.
He certainly had never thought to kiss her before, and he pushed such thoughts aside. Their arrangement wasn’t one that included kissing. At least not on the lips. Kissing her was out of the question.
“What do I do now, Jude?” she asked, biting her bottom lip.
There was no way she didn’t feel his cock throbbing beneath her. Her question snapped him back to focus on what he was about to do, and he loved the way his name sounded coming from her lips. She had to have said his name hundreds of times, but that time, he heard it differently.
“Lift your skirts up all the way up around your waist and lean back against me.”
She smelled like lilacs, and he closed his eyes, sniffing her hair when she laid her head back on his shoulder.
They were almost cheek to cheek. She bunched her skirts up and he regretted his decision to pick a position that would prevent him from seeing what was beneath them.
He would have to rely only on his sense of touch, and the way she reacted to him.
“If I do anything you don’t like. You must tell me to stop, and I will.”
She nodded.
He took her right hand in his and helped her to cup her own breast. “You might enjoy this.” He used his other hand to free her breast from her stays and push the neck of her dress down. At least he had a full view of that part, and what her creamy white breast looked like cupped in her own hand.
Jude guided her to rub her nipples, brushing his own fingers against the tight bud for himself. She let out a soft mewl.
“Do you like that?” he asked.
“Yes,” she gasped.
“Would you like something more?” He hoped she did.
“Yes.”
He knew she wouldn’t say so, but he still felt relieved to hear the word escape her lips.
With his fingers still guiding hers, she ran her hand down her body until they reached the sensitive pearl that nested within her curls.
Once he brushed her fingers across the nub, she arched her back and moaned.
“Oh, that’s wonderful,” she cried. “How did I not know that was there?”
“It’s a well-kept secret from young ladies.”
He helped her apply a bit more pressure and guided her finger to circle it. Her moans escaped at a steady pace, and his cock relished how her body pressed and moved against him.
Jude urged her finger down lower and helped her to slide it within herself. “That’s your cunt.”
The action pulled more intense moans from her, and increased the throbbing from between his own legs. “Do you feel wetness within yourself?”
She nodded. “Very much so.”
“That means you are enjoying yourself.” He guided her in how to move her finger in and out of herself. If he didn’t feel for himself, he might explode. She undulated her body with the movement of her hand. Jude closed his eyes, reveling in the moment.
He couldn’t stand it any longer. If she was going to experience her first climax in his lap, it was damn well going to be because he gave it to her.
He pulled her hand to his lips and sucked her sweet wetness from her finger.
She gasped, and he grinned at her shocked reaction.
He turned his head to face hers, brushing his lips against her ear.
“Now you know what to do, so just enjoy it now while I do it for you.”
Jude palmed the breast that lay exposed, kneading it and teasing her nipple.
When he decided she could stand it no more, he brought both hands around her body and between her legs, holding her tight against him.
He slid a finger inside her and closed his eyes, imagining what his cock might feel like sheathed in her heat.
She undulated against him, and he increased the speed at which he pleasured her.
With his other hand, he found her pearl, and she cried out when he circled it with his fingers.
“You can think of me when you do this to yourself,” he whispered.
Why did I say that? Do I even want her to think about me outside of our time together?
He didn’t need her forming a deeper attachment to him.
But something about her pleasuring herself with only thoughts of him made his cock throb harder.
She nodded and moaned, rocking herself into his movements. Her bottom teased his cock, and it was one of the most erotic, sensual moments he’d ever experienced.
He added another finger to join his first one, increasing the pace he used to thrust them inside of her. She rocked and undulated harder and he knew she was so close to experiencing what she wanted.
“You’re going to come for me,” he said, brushing his lips against her ear as he spoke. Her only response was a low moan.
He knew the moment she was going to shatter, when her cunt clenched around his finger and her body stilled. He didn’t relent and let her ride every delicious second of the waves of pleasure when she cried out his name.
Never had he enjoyed hearing his own name so much.
The intensity of the moment and her bottom moving against his cock caused him to explode in his breeches like a green lad.
He couldn’t remember the last time he had such an intense climax.
Thankfully, he wore dark breeches, so he could attempt to get himself home to change his clothing, with no one being the wiser.
She kept her head laid back on his shoulder, and they sat in silence for a few minutes while their breathing returned to normal. He lowered her skirts so that her legs were covered.
“That was… I had no idea.”
“That, my dear, was an orgasm. And now you’ve had your first.”
She sat up, and turned so she sat across his lap, with both legs dangling over one of his thighs. It felt so intimate that he should have shifted her to sit beside him, but he liked her sitting across his lap. Yet another thing he wasn’t going to allow himself to dissect.
“But what about you? Is there something I can do for you?”
He shook his head. “You don’t need to worry about that.”
“I want to, truly,” she said, placing her hand on his half-erect cock through his breeches.
Jude clasped her wrist and pulled her hand back. A hurt expression marred her beautiful visage, and he couldn’t allow her to believe for a second that he wouldn’t have enjoyed her taking him in hand.
“I already spent.”
“You also had an orgasm?” she asked. The word sounded naughtier on her tongue, and he liked it.
He nodded.
“But how?”
Jude found her eagerness to learn charming. It had been his most erotic experience, and somehow the most comfortable, even with the comical nature of the situation.
“It’s a bit hard to explain.” He mentally laughed at his choice of words. “But I enjoyed pleasuring you so much and your body rubbing against mine that it brought me to the point of doing so.”
“Is that normally how it happens for men?”
He should have known she wouldn’t leave it at that. “Not usually, but it happens. Obviously. A bit more direct attention is typically required.”
How had his life changed so much in one afternoon that his breeches were wet with his own seed and he was explaining how things could happen while she sat on his lap as if were the most normal occurrence. He was far too comfortable with Juliana, a notion that should scare him.
She contemplated his words, and he took notice of the way her lips formed a small pout. Her bottom lip was full and he wondered what it would feel like. Never in his life had he had such a thought, and that was enough to spur him into action.
“I should take my leave. I find I am in need of a change of clothing.” He offered her a self-deprecating grin, and picked her up, setting her on his feet so he could stand.
She giggled, and he laughed along with her. Even he could admit it was a bit amusing.
He took her hand and brought it to his lips. “I shall see you later this evening, will I not?”
“You shall,” she replied, far too beautiful for her own good.
He bowed and turned on his heel to take his leave, shaking his head to himself as he recalled the events of the afternoon. He’d leave it to Juliana if she wished to ask for more.