Chapter 21 - Laura
I sat uncomfortably in the chair as the guys all stood behind the two tables we had set out for the career fair. They were each suited up, talking amongst themselves about the football game last night. Miles stood on the other end, quiet as a mouse.
I crossed and uncrossed my legs and squirmed in my chair. As chatty as everyone was, it was still rather quiet. It had been since our screaming match the other day. Miles and I still had yet to talk about it.
"When do the kids start?" Cayden said, standing just behind me. I could hear him sighing, sounding annoyed.
"The classes are coming in waves to control traffic," I said, looking at my watch. I knew that the first wave would just be getting out.
I looked at the table, taking in the oxygen tanks and some other things the guys had laid out. We had a large sign on the front of the table, and I had stickers and pamphlets to hand out. It would start with the younger kids and then go to the high school students.
The entire gym was packed with tables from various businesses, including themselves, for the career day. Across from us were a dentist and a midwife. There was a lawyer to the left of us, and the police officers set up their stands next to us. The gym was filled with posters, and a large banner hung on a wall that read Career Day.
I heard a bell go off, and everyone perked up. "Must be the first bell to let the kids out," Thomas said, rolling his neck.
It was only a moment later that a swarm of children started coming into the gym. Many of them came to our table, where the guys started talking about their daily lives. They told the kids about a couple of scary fires, and I handed out stickers.
Each of the guys had a heroic story to tell, and I hadn't heard of some of them. The kids were moving along smoothly and had good questions they were asking the guys. You almost wouldn't have noticed the tension through everyone.
I opened another box of stickers behind the booth and heard someone stop beside me. "Can we talk?"
I turned, seeing Miles standing just behind me. I scowled. "Not a great time. We’re kind of busy here.”
He frowned. "The first wave is heading out, and we won't get another for a couple of minutes. Please. Just a few minutes. This is important."
I looked at the guys, and I saw they were doing fine. I was really only here to see Michael, who would be getting out a little later.
It had been a couple of days, and I knew we both had calmed. "Fine, only a few minutes."
We turned, slipping out of a door into a hallway. Miles pointed towards an open door to a classroom, and we stepped inside. The classroom was quiet, and Miles stuffed his hands into his pockets. I would have admired how good he looked in his uniform if I wasn't so nervous.
"I'm sorry for yelling at you the other day and I shouldn’t have said what I said."
My eyebrows went up, a little shocked. I expected him to fight with me more, considering everything.
"What?"
He took a step back and pressed against the wall. "I shouldn't have yelled. As angry as I am, you have a point. I wasn't a great person in college, and I ended things. I know I don’t have a great reason for it, but still."
My eyebrows went up.
"I'm still angry," he added. "And I don't know where this leaves everything, but I don't want to miss out on anything else. Laura, I want to be a part of his life."
"I want that too," I said, knowing I was whispering. "I want you to be a part of it as well. Especially with how much you've been trying to be there."
He ran a hand over his face. "Where does this leave us?"
I shrugged. "I'm not sure."
He looked at me, dropping his hands. I could see his eyes soften as his shoulders dropped. "Laura, I want something. I want something so much more than this. And I want something with you."
I felt my heart skip a beat, and I swallowed. He took a step towards me. He reached out, placing his hands on my shoulders. "I've been thinking a lot, and I have to tell you. I love you. I've been trying so hard to be calm and take things slowly, but God, keeping you at arm's length is not easy."
I'd heard Miles tell me he loved me before. I've heard him pronounce his love in many ways, but somehow, it felt like it was so much more this time. It honestly took my breath away.
"And I'm aware this is messy. I know this isn't going to be fixed overnight, and I'm angry. But god, I don't want to lose you, and I don't want to lose Michael. I don't want to miss out on anything else."
"Miles, this is." I didn't know what to say. Of course, I cared about him, but did I love him? I thought I'd loved him before, but maybe I hadn't. "Are you sure you're not just thinking this because of everything else?"
He shook his head. "No, I'm not. I know because I knew all those years ago. I just… messed everything up because I was trying so hard to please my parents. Laura, you're my mate, and I'm not screwing this up again."
My eyes widened as he reached out, taking my hands. "I'm taking whatever you are offering. But please just think about it. Think about what we could be."
I swallowed. I'd be lying if I said I hadn't. Of course, I thought about it. I dreamed about it. I fantasized about it. It invaded my mind and my soul all the time.
But is this something we should even be considering? Everything is so messy right now. Wouldn't that just add to it?
"Miles, I… I don't know. Michael has already had so much change. I don't know if this is a good idea."
"If we want this, and we make this work, how is this a bad change?"
I didn't have an answer because I knew it was fear holding me back—it has always held me back.
Miles frowned. "Do you not think I'm good enough to be his dad?"
I quickly shook my head. "No, Miles, I know you would be an amazing dad. You're caring and funny. You've been there for everything I've asked even before you know."
"Then what is holding you back?"
I rubbed my head. "Michael. I can't force him to do anything. I don't want to push him too hard and ruin this."
"And what if we get everything we want?" He reached out, cupping my face. "Just think about it. Please?"
I sank against his hands, enjoying the feel of his hands on me. I missed it. Even though we weren't really anything, I missed this. I missed the closeness and being able to relax around him.
"I'll think about it," I said.
He took a step closer to me, and I could feel a wave of heat radiate off him and hit me. I leaned into it, resting my hand on his chest.
His forehead pressed against mine, and I felt hot. Mile's fingers intertwined with mine, and I looked up. His brown eyes stared into mine, and I felt my heart skip a beat.
One second, we were utterly quiet, with nothing but our breathing, and suddenly, his lips were against mine.
Mile's hands ran through my hair as I tightened my fingers in his uniform. He growled against my lips, hoisting me further against his body.
I felt a moan leave my lips as he bites on my lip.
"Fuck," he groaned, his hand cupping the back of my head. "You smell so god damn good."
I couldn't help but smirk as I leaned in for another kiss. His tongue invaded my mouth, taking my breath away. Miles's hand reached down, cupping my ass, and I leaned back.
"We're in a school," I said between kisses.
He laughed against my lips. "I can't help it. Remember you kissed me first."
I rolled my eyes, resting my hands against his chest. "You're terrible."
He smiled. "Maybe, but you like me this way."
I snorted. Miles leaned down, kissing me once more. I wrapped my arms around his shoulders, leaning into him. I gave myself a moment just to enjoy him. I could set aside our argument for a second and just be with him. And then I heard the sound of a door moving. We both jumped slightly and turned. My eyes widened, and I recognized Michael standing in the doorway. His backpack was thrown over his shoulder, and his eyes were wide.
"Michael." I took another step back from Miles, who looked unsure what to do.
"What are you doing?" Michael asked, anger crossing his face.
"We were just talking," I said, smiling at him, knowing my face was red from embarrassment. "Did you guys go through the career stuff already?" I moved, trying to fix my outfit and my hair.
Michael crossed his arms and scowled. "Yeah, and you weren't there. The guys said you were back here talking, so why are you here kissing him?" Michael glared at Miles for a second before looking back at me.
I felt my face grow hot and started walking towards him. "Michael, I can explain. We were just talking and…."
Michael turned and stormed off. I felt my shoulders sink as I looked back at Miles. He looked defeated and frowned. "Sorry. Do you want me to go with you?"
I shook my head, knowing I needed to go after Michael alone. “I’ve got it. Just…go back to the group. I’ll join you when I’m done. I turned, heading out to find Michael, leaving Miles alone.