1
Morgan
The ship is huge. I mean, it’s freaking huge. I’m a big guy and right now I feel like a tiny little ant. It’s kind of awesome. “Xan! Look at it!“
I point at the ginormous RNJ cruise ship to our left. “And we’re gonna be on that in just a few minutes!” Xan grabs the strap on my backpack, keeping me from zigzagging along the walkway as we follow the crowd to the gangplank. We’re going to walk the plank onto the ship. That makes me chuckle.
“Yup. We’ll be on board soon.“
They have that tone they get when I’m a little too excited about stuff. It’s sort of soft and I can tell they’re smiling even when I’m not looking at them. I try to calm down, but it’s difficult. I can’t remember ever being this excited about a vacation. Not even when my parents took me and my brothers to Disneyland. Don’t get me wrong, I loved that trip. But there’s just something about this cruise that’s got me all wiggly and floaty inside. I’m pretty sure it’s the whole going on the ocean thing. I’ve never been on a cruise before. I was excited when it was going to be me and Lexi, but being here with Xan is next level.
A nice lady in an RNJ cruise line uniform looks at our boarding passes and gestures farther down the hall. “Your muster station is D, right inside the pub.”
“Thank you so much.“
A crowd of people swarms by us, and I grab Xan’s hand. They glance at me and I shrug. “I don’t want to get separated.” Their face does some kind of odd twitch thing but they nod and head off toward our muster station with me trailing behind like a gigantic kid. That makes me grin. Another group rushes by, knocking into a woman walking with a cane. She wobbles on her feet, so I drop Xan’s hand and reach out to steady her. As soon as I’m sure she won’t topple off the ship, I let go. “I’m so sorry I touched you without permission, but I didn’t want you to fall. Are you alright?”
She nods, wisps of her silver hair dancing in the breeze. “Yes. Thank you. I hate having this, but I just had knee surgery and it helps.“
She raises a cane wrapped in rainbow tape. “I saw you holding hands with your boyfriend. It’s nice to know there are other community members on the ship.” She glances around and smiles when her eyes settle on another silver-haired woman just behind her. “This is my wife, Anne, with an E. And I’m Beth.”
Anne takes Beth’s hand and kisses the back of it. “With a B.“
They both laugh and it’s the sweetest thing.
I want that so badly I can taste it. I just haven’t had any luck with dating. Someday, though. I’ll find the girl for me and we’ll settle down, and we’ll love each other to pieces and we’ll be best friends just like Xan and I are. “I’m Morgan and this is Xan.”
Beth smiles at us. “It’s nice to meet you, both. Am I right in thinking this is your first cruise?“
I nod, wondering how she knew. “I noticed your wide eyes when we came up the walkway.”
“The ship is so massive! Part of my brain can’t understand how something this large can float.“
Maybe I shouldn’t have said that. “I’m sure it will! I mean, it’s floating right now. And it will through the whole trip. So no need to worry!”
Xan wraps his hand around my wrist and tugs gently. “We should let Anne and Beth get to wherever they’re going.“
They smile and I breathe a little easier. Xan has the best smile.
Anne glances at Xan gripping my wrist and winks. “Absolutely. We don’t want to hold you up. I’m sure you have things to do.”
“Okay, thank you! See you around!“
Xan tugs me farther down the deck.
They’re almost speedwalking to our muster station, but I keep up. Xan’s five ten, and I’m six three, so my stride is longer. “You’re really excited to get to the safety talk.”
“Yup. The sooner we hear the instructions, the sooner we can explore the ship.”
Good point. We’ve already watched the safety videos, so the only thing left is to find our designated area and have the RNJ crew member do a quick review. The whole thing takes about five minutes, and as we walk away, I can feel my excitement changing from pre-vacation jitters to vacation exploration mode. But I’m not quite there yet. Once we find our cabin, our home base, then it’ll truly kick in.
We hunt for our cabin, and Xan seems to have an idea of where to go. I’m not surprised. They’re so smart and like to plan ahead. They’ve been like that since we first met during our freshman year of college, helping me find my way, always including me, and making me feel comfortable no matter the situation. They’re the very best best friend. “Xan?”
There isn’t room for us to walk side by side with all the people passing us, but they stay just ahead so they can hear what I’m saying. “Yeah?”
“I’m really glad you’re here. I appreciate how last-minute this was.“
Without hesitation, they dropped everything and said yes to the cruise so I wouldn’t lose the money I’d paid. “I’d have had fun with Lexi, but I just know my first cruising experience is going to be so much better with you.” Honestly, everything is better with Xan. “Love you.”
They stop walking and turn to me. “I love you too, and no matter what, I will always be here for you. You’re my ride or die. Forever.”
I get a little choked up and wrap them in a hug. “Good. ‘Cause you’re my ride or die too.“
Their arms circle me and my belly swoops. Wow, I’m really excited about this trip!
A door opens nearby. “Oh my god, you two are adorable!“
Still holding onto each other, we turn to find a guy standing outside his cabin, watching us. He’s about five eight with a lean build. “Are you looking for a third?” He puts his hand on his hip and tilts his head so a long lock of soft pink hair falls over his face. He thrusts out his hand. “I’m Danny. He-him. Pansexual. And depressingly single.” He makes a kind of ta-da motion with both arms. “Ready, willing, and able to party in or out of the cabin.”
“Oh, um, thanks Danny.“
I smile at him, a bit confused. “I’m Morgan. He-him. And I’m flattered, but I’m straight.” I nod at Xan. “Xan’s into guys, though.” I give them a little squeeze as I look at them for confirmation. Xan bites their lower lip but their eyes twinkle with laughter, and I can feel my grin widening.
Xan turns to Danny. “Hi Danny. I’m Xan. They-them. Also Pan. But not really looking at the moment.”
Danny holds up his hands in a surrender gesture. “Hey, no problem. I get it.“
He winks at me. “I wouldn’t be either. But the offer stands if you change your mind.” He squeezes by us and we watch him until he turns down another corridor and disappears.
“He seems nice.”
Xan nods. “He does.”
“Why do you think he thought we were together? That’s a bit of a leap.”
Xan snorts and steps back, so I let go of them. “No idea.“
They use their key card to open the door. “After you.”
Excited beyond reason, I hurry inside and stop in the middle of the room. It’s amazing. There’s a sofa, and a coffee table, and a huge bed, and a really long built-in that has drawers, and a mini fridge, and a safe. “This is incredible! And look!“
I point out the balcony doors. “The water is right there!” Scooting past the bed, I open the door and step onto our very own private balcony overlooking the—okay, it’s currently overlooking the port, but soon we’ll be able to see the ocean. Xan comes to join me, and this time, they look worried. “What’s wrong?”
“Sooooo. Did you happen to notice anything when you made your way out here?”
I frown, trying to figure out what thing they mean, because I noticed a lot. But nothing jumps out at me. “No?”
Xan wipes their hands down their face and their smile looks nervous. “Maybe go back in and look.“
Curious, I step inside and glance around. Xan sits on the bed and clears their throat. “What do you see?”
I shrug. “A sofa, a table, the huge TV—“ I whirl to look at them. “Oh my god, there’s no bathroom!”
Xan shakes their head. “There’s a bathroom. It’s behind that door right as you walk into the cabin.”
I rush across the room, yank the door open, and breathe a huge sigh of relief. “There is a bathroom! I was worried we’d have to share with other people.“ I flip on the light. “It’s a nice bathroom.”
“It is. But you didn’t notice anything else?“
I close the door and look around the cabin, shaking my head. Xan sprawls out like a starfish on the bed. “Nothing at all?” They move their arms and legs like they’re making a snow angel in the bedspread. And then it hits me.
There’s only one bed.