21. Chapter 21
Jake
After a grueling workout session with the guys, we decide to head over to Shutout, the local bar where the owner makes sure we’re left alone. We’ve all driven separately as one of our stupid little games is whoever makes it to the bar last has to buy the drinks.
When I step out of my car and head in, I notice Codey and Louis are already sitting in our booth, but that’s it. My money is safe for another day—but Theo’s isn’t.
We all keep our eyes on the door and wait for the moment he walks through, noticing the look of disappointment etched onto his face as he makes his way over to us.
Standing up, we start cheering, “Here he comes. You know the rule T, up to the bar you go.”
Theo audibly groans and heads to the bar to pay. When he comes back, he slumps into the booth next to Louis before we all clink our glasses together and shoot the shit.
“Feel better after your workout?” Codey asks as he takes a sip of his drink.
“A little, I just don’t know what Lottie I’m going to get when I go back to hers, you know?”
“She’s got the girls with her, so hopefully that’s helping,” Theo mentions.
“True, I know she’s grieving and it’s a really difficult time, but I just want to be there for her.”
“That’s all you can do, brother. Remember, she doesn’t know who you are either, which has to be incredibly difficult for her. Put yourself in her shoes for a minute.”
Codey makes a good point; I haven’t stopped to think what it would be like if I was in her position. I’m such a fucking idiot.
“Probably why she doesn’t have any memories of you; her subconscious doesn't want her to remember such a loser.”
I roll my eyes as Louis laughs into his pint, and the others follow.
“Alright alright, laugh it up, assholes. Lottie will remember me one day and she’ll see how close we were. Then I’ll be able to tell her how I feel, and she will fall in love with me too.”
I wish I was as confident about this as I sound. “Come on losers, let's go play some darts.”
“Jesus, Theo, you have to aim for the board, man, not the wall. At this rate, you’re going to be owing Huck money to replaster the place.”
I have never seen someone suck so bad at darts. It’s part of the reason we play it, just to watch Theo fumble.
“So, now the cast is off, does that mean Charlie doesn’t need your help? That’s less than ideal right now,” Theo says once he’s collected his darts out of the wall.
“Luckily for now, the doctor said she’ll still need help around the house while she has her PT and gets used to the crutches. Plus, Bella still needs her dog walker, and she’s used to seeing me all the time. I don’t want her thinking anything’s wrong, do I?”
That’s it, Jake, you’re doing this for the dog…. yeah right.
At the mention of the word Bella, I see something go off in Louis’ head, and that’s not always a good thing.
“What are you thinking about over there, Frenchie? You’ve got that look on your face where you’re either about to do or say something stupid.”
“I was thinking about the fact we’re all dog dads. Well, you’re more like a step-dog-dad, Jakey, but it’s the same thing, I guess. Isn’t that cool?” he spouts off.
None of us seem to be as impressed by this as he is, judging by the looks being thrown his way.
The only thing relevant about this whole farce of a conversation is they all own dogs, and Lottie’s dog loves me.
Codey rolls his eyes at Louis, “Step-dog-dad? What the fuck is that? I can’t believe we’re even having this conversation. We are not the dogs’ parents, dick.”
He slides a hand down his face in exasperation. I get it, bud, it’s utterly ridiculous.
“Don’t be so fucking miserable all the time. Our dogs bring us more joy than any child would, so therefore we are dog dads. It’s like an exclusive little club. We can have group chats and everything specifically for our dogs.”
Louis is on a roll now, and who are we to stop him?
So just like that, Dog Dad Chat is born.
We hang out for another hour before we part ways, and I drive back to Lottie’s.
Feeling the need to be close to the woman I love, I put on a playlist—the same as the one I made for her when she passed her driving exam.
I hadn’t even met her at that point, we were still writing letters, but I knew we would be friends for life.
I didn’t, however, know I’d fall in love with her.
“A Thousand Years” by Christina Perri comes on, and sixteen-year-old me must have been onto something because this song is so clearly written for how I feel about my best friend. I’d wait a thousand years for her if I had to.
When I pull up into the space outside Lottie’s beach house, I notice all the other cars are gone and only her white Beetle remains. Opening the door, I see Lottie lying on the sofa with a blanket draped over her and an iPad in her hand. She startles at the sound of the door closing.
“Jesus, Jake, you scared the living daylights out of me,” her hands clutch her chest as she gets her breathing under control.
“Sorry, Lottie, I didn’t mean to,” I apologize as I take the seat next to her. Bella comes over from her bed and shows me her new toy, which then seems to start a game of fetch.
“Did you have a good time with the girls?” I ask, turning my body to face Lottie
Her face lights up. “It was great actually, it really took my mind off everything.”
But as she says this, it’s almost like her brain receives a reminder she isn’t allowed to be happy right now, and she shuts down on me. Picking her iPad back up, she continues on with what she was doing, shaking her head and muttering to herself.
Giving her a bit of space, I take Bella out for a quick walk. We walk along the shoreline with Bella barking at the water as it touches her paws. She’s so funny, I love this little dog so much.
Lottie hasn’t moved from her position when we arrive back.
She’s still working away on her iPad, glasses perched high on her beautiful face, so I pad out to the kitchen and start to make us dinner.
Cooking is one thing I’ve always loved to do, and I’ve always done it for Lottie where I can.
She’s more of a baker than a cook—which works for my major sweet tooth and she makes the best red velvet cupcakes in the world.
What I wouldn’t do for one of those right now.
I end up making a quick stir fry and, as we sit at the table to eat, I notice how much more subdued Lottie has become since I took Bella out.
She picks at her dinner, and her eyes are glassy.
I can see how much all this is taking its toll on her, and it literally stabs me right in my heart.
I remember when my dad died and all I wanted to do was be left alone, and I fear this is what Lottie wants too—who can blame her?
Faking a yawn, she turns to me as I’m clearing up the kitchen.
“I’m really tired, I’m going to go lie down.”
She doesn’t even wait for my response as she grabs her crutches and hobbles off to her bedroom.
Bella looks up from beside my feet and whines.
“I know, girl, how are we going to help your mama, huh?”
Bella huffs. I feel ya, Bella, I feel ya.