Chapter 18b CJ #2
Uncle Christopher and the boys glowered at Jana.
Diesel could attest that she lacked awareness to accurately read the room.
It was why she placed herself in so many dangerous situations and trusted the wrong motherfuckers.
Besides, he’d never told her the entire history of Rebel and him.
She didn’t know that his little sister fancied herself in love with him and had a named picked out for their fucking baby.
His entire body tightened, and he gnashed his teeth together. “Aunt Meggie–”
“Nice meeting you, Jana,” she interrupted.
“Can I please leave, Momma?” Rebel begged, near hysteria.
Diesel clenched his jaw.
“I’ll see you in a few minutes, love,” Aunt Meggie said softly.
“We’re aren’t going back home for another week or two, right?” Rebel asked wildly. “I can’t–”
“We’ll see, but remember Kaia’s there and probably misses you, since we’re his only friends.”
“I miss him too,” Rebel cried, “but it doesn’t matter. I can’t even see him because everybody gets in the way.”
“If I sneak you by him, will that help, Reb?” Axel asked, concern laced in his little voice.
“I guess,” Rebel said. “I’ll see you at breakfast.”
“Wait, Reb–”
“Nope, mister, sit. We have to talk about my candy bar and the change you want for a penny.”
“Uh–”
“Quiet! Now, Diesel, what do you want?”
“I already told you. And…” He met Uncle Christopher’s stricken gaze. “Are you really not coming home for another week or two?”
“I’ll get there when I get there,” she snapped. “You’re still not taking my advice.”
“Don’t make them pay for my bad decisions.”
“Diesel is brilliant, Aunt…Miss…uh, ma’am,” Jana piped in.
“Meggie is fine, Jana,” she said.
“Can I call you Aunt Meggie like Diesel?”
Aunt Meggie sighed. “In due time,” she said, not unkindly. “Let Rebel adjust to your presence. I have nothing against you, so please don’t take it that way.”
“O-Okay.” Her eyes huge, Jana gulped and looked from CJ to Uncle Christopher, then lifted her uneasy gaze to Diesel. “Chris…Christopher–”
Uncle Christopher growled at the same time Aunt Meggie huffed.
Jana paled.
“He’s not Christopher to you, Jana,” Aunt Meggie said. “I’d prefer you call him Outlaw, but Uncle Christopher is fine. Ask his preference.”
“Yes, ma’am.” Jana sounded hurt. “I-I don’t think he likes me. He won’t talk to me.”
Aunt Meggie was silent for a moment. “Can you hear me?”
She didn’t specify who. Though Jana nodded as if Aunt Meggie could see her, and said, “yes,” Diesel suspected she meant Uncle Christopher.
Apparently, he did too because he said, “yeah, baby.”
“Welcome Jana into the house.”
“I’m waitin’ for you.”
“I suggest you don’t.”
“Megan–”
“All of the decisions were made without me. Deal with them.”
“Baby, please–”
“Stop, Outlaw. Just stop!”
Snapping his brows together, Uncle Christopher stiffened. “I ain’t fuckin’ Outlaw to you–”
“You’re not Outlaw to anyone,” Aunt Meggie retorted. “And I’m sick to death of Christopher. I need Outlaw. I want Outlaw. I want him to love me as only he could. I want my psycho back!” she yelled. “I adore Christopher. He’s kind, funny, and loving. But Outlaw is the rock.”
“I don’t like you callin’ me Outlaw.”
“I don’t care what you like, Christopher,” she spat.
“I fucked up Cash and Digger,” he blurted.
“Did you kill them?”
“I can if you want me to.”
“What do you want to do, Outlaw?”
“Megan, listen to me–”
“No, you listen to me. What does your club mean to you?”
“Not as much as you mean to me.”
“Then if I mean that much to you, protect me. Outlaw knows what that means. Christopher’s love for me blinds him to reality.”
“Do you want Cash and Digger dead?”
“Do you?”
“Megan–”
“Is Outlaw or Christopher asking?”
Uncle Christopher swallowed. “Outlaw.”
“I see. They’re on my No-Kill list, idiots that they are. You cannot kill our family, Outlaw.”
“I’ll kill anyfuckinbody I gotta to get you back.”
“You’re such a psycho.”
“Yeah, baby, but I’m your psycho.”
“Yes,” Aunt Meggie said softly. “You are.”
Uncle Christopher shuddered. “Come home, Megan. Today. Please. If the rest of the girls come home and you don’t–”
“I can’t,” she said, sniffling. “Not yet. I’m not ready.”
“Megan–”
“No, just handle your business. Take care of our boys. Be nice to Jana. Don’t kill our family.”
“And CJ?” he croaked.
“You know what I want, Chris…Outlaw. You knew then and you know now.”
“He scared to eat at the club, baby.” Uncle Christopher lifted a tortured gaze to CJ. “He said something about Digger lettin’ him die–”
“Are you blaming me for that as well?”
“No! No! That’s all on me, Megan. That’s–”
“Jana?”
At Aunt Meggie’s call, Jana straightened and Diesel shifted.
“Ma’am?”
“I need you to leave the room. What I’m about to say is very sensitive and I don’t want you to ever be in a position that endangers yourself or the club or the family, especially my children and my husband. I will take you under my wing. Okay?”
Jana smiled. “Yes,” she whispered. “I’ve never had anyone take me under their wing. Momma and Daddy are a little strict.”
“You’ll be fine,” Aunt Meggie promised, and for the first time in days, Diesel truly relaxed. He wanted Aunt Meggie to say she was returning today and maybe she would.
Maybe she needed this call to help her.
Helping Jana to her feet, Diesel kissed her forehead and directed her to his room, then sat in the chair she’d vacated.
“It’s just us, Aunt Meggie,” Diesel said.
“Do you remember when you told me about the friend that Snake killed and then locked you in the shed with his body, Outlaw?” she said.
Uncle Christopher winced but nodded. “Yeah, baby.”
“Why do you think you were able to do that?”
“Because I knew what a motherfucker that motherfucker was,” Uncle Christopher barked.
“Why, Christopher?”
“Fuck, Megan, probably ‘cuz I’d been readin’ motherfuckers most of my fuckin’ life so I’d fuckin’ survive. Ma didn’t fuckin’ protect me. Big Joe did and that just made me a motherfuckin’ target.”
“So suppose Patricia had protected you?” Aunt Meggie pressed. “Then what?”
“Fuck, baby. I don’t fuckin’ know. I probably would’ve just been more of a fuckin’ target. Or maybe I wouldn’t have. I ain’t sure.”
“No, Christopher isn’t sure. Outlaw knows.
Outlaw has unsurpassed instincts. He can assess a situation in seconds.
I’ve seen him do it. Outlaw knows he didn’t have our son’s upbringing, so our son shouldn’t have had the same introduction to the club.
CJ is scared, Christopher. Scared to disappoint you. ”
“He misses you, baby. He need you as much as me. As much as Diesel. Jo. Ransom. Ryder. Rule.”
“How many battles did Big Joe fight for you?” Aunt Meggie pressed.
“Very fuckin’ few,” Uncle Christopher grumbled.
“How did he integrate you into the club?”
“When I was a kid, he ain’t let me come too much.
Then, he left for a lil’ while. Ain’t know then but it was cuz your ma was pregnant with you.
Once he got back, it wasn’t long before I moved to the club.
He loved me but that motherfucker was hard.
I had to fight my own fuckin’ battles, stand on my own two fuckin’ feet.
Figure shit out. Use my brain first even if was to strategize how to fuck a motherfucker up.
I earned every fuckin’ patch I got. Every cut, gunshot, stab wound, broken bone, and black eye. Earned it all.”
“What else did you earn, Outlaw?” she asked.
“Fuck, fear and respect. Motherfuckers knew…” His voice trailed off and he snapped his gaze to the phone.
“Say it again, Christopher,” Aunt Meggie ordered.
“Megan–”
“You earned respect. Diesel earned respect. Your reputations precede you. You had an awful childhood because your grandfather was a monster. Diesel was abandoned. You two knew how to fight for your places in life and in the club. Our younger boys needed a different route. Whatever confidence Diesel lacked, he gained by living on his own in college. It was what I wanted the other boys to experience.”
“Maybe club life ain’t for CJ,” Uncle Christopher pushed out.
“That must be CJ’s call. He didn’t want to punch Rory. Although I disagreed with his stance, give him a pass, Outlaw.”
“He hit the lil’ motherfucker, baby.”
“But who he really needs to punch is Narci and Potter. Give them an Outlaw-style beating. Not sanctioned by you, Christopher. He has to do it. Those jerks didn’t protect him. I’ve forgiven them. You’ve punished them, but they let CJ down. He needs to deal with them.”
“Fuck no! Cuz if they beat the fuck outta him, then I’ll–”
“Do absolutely nothing,” Aunt Meggie said. “You’ll let him lick his wounds, heal, and learn how to fight better. You fight his battles and then suddenly turn on him when he refuses to fight the club’s battles. You didn’t learn how to be so forceful because Daddy coddled you.”
“Could you really deal with one of those grown motherfuckers beating CJ?”
“It would break my heart,” Aunt Meggie said.
“I’m sure I’d cry in your arms, Outlaw. But what will break me more is watching one of my sons fall apart, trying to reach a goal when we didn’t fully prepare him.
Respect everyone? What was Daddy thinking?
Tell our sons to respect few and fear none.
If he doesn’t want to eat at the club, that’s understandable. I’ll handle that.”
“How?” Uncle Christopher asked suspiciously.
“By reminding Fia and whoever else is cooking that if they look at my boys wrong, they’re dead.”
“I can kill them today if you promise you’ll come home tonight.”
“No.”
“Megan–”
“I can’t–”
“Tomorrow, I’m makin’ arrangements for our anniversary,” he interrupted, his desperation returning. “I found the perfect cabin for us. And I got a special surprise for you. I was gonna give it to your for your birthday, but Diesel pickin’ it up for me tomorrow, so I can bring it with us.”
“Christopher–”