Chapter 27b. Rebel #3
“Listen to me, Reb.” Momma grabbed Rebel’s hand and squeezed.
“You cannot deny your feelings no matter what. If you love Diesel, you love Diesel. You shouldn’t be ashamed of that once you’re legal.
It’s dangerous now. Especially for him. Do you want your daddy to kill him? Do you hate Diesel that much?”
Rebel burst into tears again. “Of course not. I just…Daddy wouldn’t kill Diesel after all that’s happened! I don’t believe that no matter what.”
“Sweetheart, please stop underestimating Christopher, especially now. He’s on edge.
He will kill Diesel even quicker. Don’t put his life in danger just because you want to stake your claim.
You will lose him permanently. Once Christopher kills him, there will be no turning back. He will be dead, Reb.”
“Then I’ll hate Daddy forever!”
“Would that be fair? Everyone has repeatedly warned you to leave Diesel alone because you’re underage. You can’t blame your daddy’s reaction when he’s already given you fair warning.”
“But—”
“You said when you turned eighteen you wanted to kill Torie. Would you say that was fair warning?”
“Yes, but—”
“No buts. In life, you have to play fair even when you’re outside the boundaries of rules, Rebel.”
“I don’t understand. Fairness is unnecessary if you don’t have rules.”
Smiling, Momma tangled her fingers through Rebel’s hair. “It’s okay, my little love. You’ll understand eventually. Just trust me to guide you.” She searched her face. “You do trust me, don’t you?”
“Of course, Momma,” Rebel said without hesitation, so confused. She had a lot of questions but she didn’t want Momma to think she was a small child. Momma spoke to Rebel without censure and without making her feel stupid. “What should I do about Diesel?”
“What do you want to do about him?”
“I-I miss him.”
Momma nodded. “I miss Christopher.”
“But it’s…it’s different. I feel…you and Daddy raised Diesel. So much so that he’s just like Daddy. Meaning I’m like both of them.” A hysterical little sob escaped her. “I don’t know what’s grosser. Wanting to marry my brother or wanting a man like my father.”
“Diesel’s your adopted brother and our subconscious plays a big part in who we choose as lovers. Christopher is like my daddy in so many ways, but Daddy was just Daddy to me. I loved him dearly. There was nothing gross or sexual about it.”
“So, I’m not a creep?”
“Of course not! You’re a beautiful young lady who loves a guy, but you were wrong to corner Diesel the way you did the other day before he went on his trip.”
Rebel’s eyes widened. “You saw?”
“I did. As brutal as he was when he told you about Torie, you left him no choice, love.”
“I’m sorry!”
“You owe him the apology. Not me.” Heaving in a breath, Momma said, “I intend to let Kaia go.”
“What? No!”
“It isn’t fair to him, Reb. You want Diesel and—”
“But I don’t see much of Kaia! I’ve either been in the hospital since you hired him or here in LA.”
“I haven’t seen Christopher in several days. That doesn’t mean I want another man.”
“You don’t understand!” Rebel wailed.
“When Christopher left me with Johnnie, I still wanted your daddy. I loved him whether he was with me or not. That was your observation a little over two hours ago, sweetheart.”
“I didn’t say those exact words,” Rebel grumbled.
Momma lifted a brow.
“I like Kaia. I swear! I want a chance with him.”
“He’s a good guy, sweetheart. He shouldn’t be hurt because of Diesel. You’ll string him along as your second choice. Then when you’re old enough and if Diesel’s available, you’ll leave Kaia in the wind.”
“That isn’t true!” Rebel said wildly. “Diesel’s my brother.”
Confusion spread across Momma’s face and she snapped her brows together. “He’s your adopted brother,” she reminded Rebel. “And you can’t jerk Diesel’s feelings around either, love.”
“I don’t want to marry Daddy! A man like Daddy.”
Sighing, Momma got to her feet. “Unfortunately, you can’t deny your deepest longing. For you, that’s Diesel.”
Rebel felt as if she were going insane. She longed for Diesel. She’d loved him for so long, but…but…it suddenly felt wrong. The way Momma laid everything out was more effective than Daddy’s shouting and threatening. “Please don’t fire Kaia, Momma. Please. He needs the job.”
“And you want a chance with him.”
Rebel nodded frantically.
“I’ll think about it.” She started for the door and halted. “And tell Diesel that you want a chance with Kaia. Girl-to-girl, that’s the right thing to do.” She squinted. “As long as you’re absolutely sure you don’t want a future with Diesel.”
“He’s my brother and we’re both just like Daddy,” Rebel blurted. “It’s disgusting.”
“I wouldn’t say that,” Momma said sadly. “But I’m a romantic.” Lowering her lashes, she shrugged. “Just another way you and Diesel are like Christopher.”
Blinking away tears, Rebel met her mother’s understanding gaze. “I’ll talk to Diesel,” she whispered. “And apologize for everything.”
“And welcome Jana?”
“I don’t know if I can go that far.”
“In time, sweetheart.” She blew a kiss at her and walked out.