Chapter Thirty-Two
Several times, Ryan raised his hand to knock on CJ’s door, then lowered it just as many times. He wasn’t even sure why the fuck he was there.
CJ had survived. There was no tragic ending. Much to Bash’s disappointment. At least according to Willard. Why Ryan believed that lying porcupine, he couldn’t say.
Willard was after him to look at a video of Harley. He swore Ryan would find it hilarious. Ryan was just as certain he wouldn’t. As a matter of fact, he’d hate seeing her so debased, even as angry as he was with her.
Since the last get-together, he’d barely spoken to that witch. After the dust settled and he fucking thought about her bullshit, not only was he fucking disgusted, he was… hurt .
So, yeah, fuck her.
Laying his hand on his cousin’s bedroom door, he started to back away, then stopped. He still didn’t like CJ— too much —but he no longer wanted him dead. He’d check on the motherfucker and pretend he didn’t give a fuck.
‘Cause he didn’t. He wasn’t some bitch, boohooing behind a motherfucker who still didn’t have the decency to have acne.
He balled his fist and pounded on the door.
“Come in,” CJ called.
Good to know he kept the door unlocked. Next time he’d just barge in.
Pasting a smirk on his face, Ryan swung the door open and walked into CJ’s room. He fucking refused to admire the décor or the size. It absolutely didn’t matter.
“Hey, cuck.”
CJ didn’t lift his head from the magazine he was reading. “Hey, motherfucker.”
Ryan ran out of words.
Huffing, CJ threw the magazine aside and glared at Ryan. “I’m fine, Ryan. Are you going to be sentimental, or can I count on your assholery?”
Ryan sniggered; CJ smiled, and the tension broke.
“Mom cried for two fucking days, fuckhead.”
“Aunt Zoann told me how upset she was when she visited. Earlier today, she called Diesel, and my mom and dad in. She slapped the shit out of me, Diesel, and Dad.”
“No shit?” Ryan puffed out his chest in pride. “Why Outlaw?”
“She said if he hadn’t gotten me involved in club business, I wouldn’t have been there after hours. Uncle Val started to tell her something, then she threatened to knock the fuck out of him too.”
“Your mom didn’t step in? ”
“Nope. Methinks she wants to slap the shit out of us herself.”
“Chicks, man,” Ryan grumbled.
“They make the world beautiful.”
Ryan shook his head. “That’s some sappy ass shit, bro.”
“Perhaps, but a fucking inescapable truth.”
Ryan considered telling CJ about DeLuca, then quickly nixed the idea. Whatever reason Bash sent Pounder had to play out. Ryan just couldn’t risk Molly because of a few minutes of peace and acceptance between him and CJ.
Unsure how to ask if he could hang out, Ryan headed to CJ’s desk and sat in the chair.
“We can go to the media room down the hall and watch a movie,” CJ offered.
Although it was innocent, it just reminded Ryan of their wealth disparity.
“I’m beginning to think you’re fucking hiding, CJ,” Grant Harrington said, leading Rory and Devon into the room.
“Hey, Ry,” Rory greeted, not batting an eye to find him there.
“I was wondering where you went when you left the house,” Devon said.
Grant dug in his jacket pocket and pulled out an unsmoked joint. “In honor of my last night here, lookie what I brought.”
Rory threw his arms around Grant. “My favorite cousin.”
CJ laughed. “Suck up.”
“You’re having a party, little brother, and you didn’t invite me?
” Diesel asked, breezing into the room. Though he didn’t have a coat on, he still wore a dress shirt, necktie, and trousers.
His right hand remained bandage. Motherfucker was lucky he was left-handed.
“I have an errand to run and I was wondering if you wanted to ride with me?”
“And leave my guests?” CJ shook his head. “We were going to watch a movie in the media room.”
“I never agreed,” Ryan said, pleased that CJ wasn’t abandoning their plans.
“There’s no reason we can’t all go,” Rory said. “You have the fucking room in your S-Class.”
Grant pocketed the weed. “Where are you taking us?”
“Nowhere. I asked CJ to come,” Diesel replied. “I want you to meet Jana.”
“Uh, dude, unless Tabitha changed her name, why are you introducing another woman to CJ?” Ryan asked, curious in spite of himself.
“Who is Jana and why does that name sound so familiar?” Rory asked, frowning.
Jana. Jana. Jana.
The name turned over in Ryan’s head and he squinted. Hadn’t Bash mentioned a chick named Jana? Or had Ryan seen something in that endless stack of documents Bash had shown him over the months?
There wasn’t only one Jana in the world, but, though he was evil incarnate, Bash was frighteningly like Outlaw in some ways.
He didn’t figure shit out like Outlaw, yet he knew how to set shit in motion and run circles around motherfuckers when he had a head start.
It stood to reason that Bash was setting serious shit into motion by using Uncle Johnnie.
Ryan wanted to say he was out of it. He wanted to believe that if he wasn’t desperate to get Molly back, he would’ve backed away after Outlaw beat his ass.
He just didn’t know. Now he was fucking over Rebel and Harley, keeping Pounder’s identity to himself, and not revealing that Aunt Meggie would probably end up dead sooner rather than later.
Partly because he didn’t want to endanger Molly; partly because it was hard to believe how deeply Bash had infiltrated their lives; and partly because of fear .
What began as hatred of CJ had spiraled into fuckery and mayhem. If someone just told Outlaw the full story, the trajectory would change. Unlike Bash who needed months to put his plans into motion, Outlaw struck fast and thoroughly.
Devon thumped his shoulder. “What silicon pussy are you lost in, dick nose? CJ wants to know if a cheeseburger pizza is okay?”
“I prefer pepperoni and black olives,” Ryan said, trying to sound normal.
“Boring,” Grant razzed.
“Classic,” Ryan retorted.
“Uninteresting,” Rebel chortled, walking into the room and barely acknowledging Diesel.
Ryan had heard all about it the other night when Rebel stumbled into her room, called Mattie, and sobbed the entire story. But knowing how she looked underneath her clothes left him oddly guilty as he faced her.
She halted feet away from CJ and waved her phone in front of him. “Did you tell Kaia to call me?”
“Nope.”
“Kaia called you again?” Diesel tried and failed to sound casual.
“Yep.” She smacked her lips and threw a smirk over her shoulder. She looked at CJ again and raised her cell phone. “I didn’t answer him. Before I call him back, I want to make sure he isn’t calling me because you ordered him to.”
“He’s a fucking emo fuckhead,” Diesel said flatly.
Rory took a drag of the cigarette he’d just lit and released the smoke. “Not a real one. More of an eboy.”
“He still isn’t good enough for Rebel,” Diesel said.
“Oho, famous last words, huh, fuck face?” she said.
Diesel glared at the back of her head. “We agreed to be friends. ”
“That comes with caveats.”
“Too late. Negotiations are closed, Rebel.”
“Fuck you. You can’t fucking disparage my boyfriends or dates.”
“That goes against the rules of friendship and big brothering.”
“You know what else goes against the rules of friendship and little sistering ? You . You can’t fucking dictate my life when you’d never listen to a thing I have to say about yours .”
“You’re so fucking frustrating.”
“Quid pro quo,” she replied.
Diesel wasn’t winning this one and he knew it judging by the putrid look on his face.
“Are you two fucking finished?”
“I’m going fuck my night away,” Diesel said viciously, “so, yes, I’m done.”
Ryan was going fucking soft because he almost felt sorry for the way Rebel’s eyes brimmed with tears.
“I’m going to call Kaia,” she said shakily. “See what’s up with him. I’ve signed up for MyLOL and gotten some matches.”
“What?”
Although CJ looked ready to kick Diesel’s ass when Rebel looked ready to cry, his outrage joined Diesel’s to chorus the question.
“Does Dad know you’ve joined a dating app?” CJ demanded.
“No,” she said defiantly. “Neither does Momma.”
“It’s for thirteen- to nineteen year olds, Reb,” Rory said, finished with his cigarette.
Ryan didn’t notice where he’d put it out at.
“That, uh, what’s wrong with Kaia again?”
“Rebel thinks I’ve interfered in some way,” CJ said.
“He hasn’t called me in days. He ghosted me.”
“Why don’t you just call and hear him out, Reb?” CJ suggested.
Grant nodded. “If you like him as much as you say, just listen to his explanation.”
“He promised to take me out.”
“He can’t do that if you don’t see what he wants,” Ryan said, since Diesel was about to go fucking psycho.
Once Rebel mentioned the dating app, Diesel went silent, but the wildness in his eyes spoke volumes.
“Fine,” she said. “I’ll call him.”
Diesel loosened his tie. “We’re going to the media room to watch a movie. Come and let us know what he says.”
“Whatever.” She stalked out of the room.
“Fuck, I’m so fucking glad I don’t have a sister,” Ryan blurted.
“I was thinking the same thing, Ry,” Devon said, shaking his head.
For the first time in forever, Ryan and Devon smiled at each other and nodded in agreement.
“I wouldn’t trade my little sisters for the world,” CJ said.
“Me, neither,” Rory agreed.
Ryan snickered. “One more fucking strike, cucks, and we’re revoking your dude cards.”
They all laughed. Even Diesel.
The camaraderie felt odd.
But so very nice.