38. Chapter 38
Chapter 38
Dean
W e were on our second day of being on this damn ship, and I already hated it. I’d never felt claustrophobic before, but there was nowhere to go on this thing. Everywhere you turned, there was someone watching you. Rhidian’s fighters didn’t treat us badly. They weren’t even afraid of us, but they were intrigued. And curious people led to constant observation, which was pushing my wolf to the edge.
It didn’t help that I was doing everything I could to avoid Damon. Seeing him in that cage had been bad enough, but watching that thing talk through his lips pissed me the fuck off. I wanted to tear into him. To punish him for taking away one of the most important people in my life.
But I couldn’t.
Because he was inside Damon’s body, inside his head. Hurting him would only hurt Damon.
And I just didn’t know how to deal with that.
Where was all the anger and need for violence supposed to go?
Unfortunately for my brothers, it went straight into the training Fizzle insisted we do every moment of the day.
And unfortunately for me, it meant that I couldn’t do shit because all I could think about was the man below decks that I was so inadequately useless to when it came to helping.
It felt like the cycle of my life, and I was battling my internal demons right now to not let them convince me I’d never be good enough for the one shining light in my life—Alyssa.
“You will summon your fire and you will do so in a timely fashion, cat!” Fizzle barked at Maddox, who was pouting in the middle of the deck for the second day in a row.
“Are you out of your mind?” Maddox shouted back. “We are standing on a wooden boat in the middle of an ocean and you want me to set it on fire ?”
“I don’t want you to set it on fire! I want you to summon your fire with the same level of control that a two-year-old child has, and not set this boat on fire,” Fizzle shouted back.
Ryder was currently sitting on his ass, watching the two of them like a tennis match and taking great enjoyment from the whole thing. Personally, I had a throbbing headache, and this wasn’t helping the never-ending black mood I couldn’t seem to shake.
“Do you have a death wish?” Maddox snapped. “Of course, I don’t have the control of a two-year-old. I’ve had this magic for less than a week. You can try to insult me all you want by calling me a child, but the reality is that I am a child when it comes to magic, and screaming at me to just do it won’t make it any easier.”
Fizzle hissed, flapping his wings in agitation as his claws scraped through the wooden barrel he was standing on.
Maddox had a point, but apparently, Fizzle didn’t care for it.
“Then maybe trust the other child to use his own magic and put it out with his water,” Fizzle huffed, eventually pointing a wing in my direction.
Apparently, it was my turn to shout, but then Ryder cut in with, “That’s an excellent idea.”
And my stomach just fell out of my ass.
I glared at my friend, and he smirked at me in response. “You can do that, right, Dean? Seems as you’re the one with so much self control.”
Fucking brat.
This was the problem with letting people get to know you. They knew exactly where to poke to annoy you the most. And Ryder also knew there was no way I’d back down from a challenge or ever admit that I couldn’t do something. Especially not with all these people watching.
“Sure,” I seethed, gritting my teeth and snarling at Ryder, who just laughed harder.
He was lucky that he had our beautiful mate next to him, or I’d have shown exactly what I could do with my water.
But concentrating on glaring at Ryder while I imagined all the things I’d do to him wasn’t the best idea I’d had, because I barely avoided the fireball that flew past my head. I hit the deck hard, still feeling the heat of the fire on the side of my face as I did.
I really, really hated this fucking place.
Pushing back up to standing my glare was firmly on Maddox this time. I didn’t even look behind me to make sure there wasn’t a fire smouldering on the ship, which I probably should have been putting out.
“It was an accident,” Maddox rushed out, his eyes wide as he held up his hands in surrender. “I didn’t mean to.”
My eyes squinted in annoyance as I tried to decide if he was telling the truth. When I realised my wolf was just laughing in the back of my mind and not raging for violence, I decided it probably was. Or perhaps he just wasn’t as concerned about me as he was about his own furry hide.
As Ryder rolled about on the deck in laughter, I plotted my revenge. And without even an outward sign of what I was going to do, I let the magic free to do what it wanted to. It flowed freely, almost dancing through the air and straight to the biggest source of our energy. Latching onto the ocean, it drew up a massive wave, crashing it down on top of Maddox and flooding across the desk, soaking Ryder as it went. Alyssa was unfortunately caught in the crossfire, but thankfully, she saw the funny side as she wiped the seawater from her eyes.
Maddox stood as still as a statue. His arms held out to the sides as every muscle bunched from the shock of the cold water.
“Un…called. For!” Maddox shouted, before shaking his entire body in disgust.
I could only imagine what his lion was saying right now, and it had my wolf huffing in amusement.
“It was an accident,” I deadpanned. “I didn’t mean to.”
Maddox squinted in annoyance, and if it wasn’t for Fizzle landing between us and drawing our attention, things probably would have escalated to the two of us hurling magic at each as our tantrum got out of control.
“You realise that was the greatest display of magic that you’ve achieved to date,” Fizzle informed me as he carefully stepped around the puddles that were now left on the deck. “It’s almost like you finally grasped the idea of control.”
Even his compliments sounded like insults. But he had a point.
Ryder pushed to his feet, coming to join our conversation, and I could see the intrigue lighting up his eyes. “So, you’re saying that control comes from where?” he asked, genuinely interested. “Is it instinctual? Like the less you try, the easier it is to grab hold of?”
“It could be based on emotion,” I reasoned aloud. “I was annoyed and…”
Then a funnel of wind slammed into me, picking me up off the deck and hurling me through the air.
Panic hit me hard as I realised I was about to go over the edge. Ending up in the ocean would be bad enough, but who knew what kinds of slimy critters lived out in the depths of the Nymeria sea?
As I felt myself falling, the world seemed to slip into slow motion. I could see the panic on Ryder’s face as he ran for the edge of the ship. Alyssa was surging to her feet as her mouth opened in a shout. Of course, Fizzle looked nothing but amused as he watched my descent towards the ocean.
But the magic inside me rose, and I instinctually allowed it to burst free. It reached for the water, pulling it up and around me. Where I was once falling, I now found myself sprawled on a slab of ice, floating on the stationary crest of a wave that shouldn’t have been able to exist.
As soon as I thought that, the wave pitched forward as if it had suddenly realised it needed to continue with its journey and the ice crashed down onto the deck of the ship, shattering as it did, and sending me skidding along the wood.
I came to a stop in the centre of the deck, lying on my back with my legs and arms spread out as I breathed a sigh of relief.
That had been close.
No one moved, no one said a thing as everyone stared at me in shock.
I actually did that. My first instinct was to look to Alyssa as the source, but I’d felt the magic move through me, reacting as simply as involuntarily ducking when someone threw something at you.
At least I had the answer to my question now. Ryder was right, this all came down to instincts… and maybe being scared shitless as well.
Alyssa’s soft hands bracketed my cheeks and my eyes focused on the beautiful woman now crouched over me.
“Are you okay?” she asked, her gaze roved over me like she was searching for injury. “That was insane.”
“I am so fucking sorry.” Ryder rushed out as I let Alyssa guide me back to my feet. I wouldn’t admit it aloud, but my legs were definitely shaking. If anyone noticed, I was definitely going to blame it on the adrenaline.
My wolf pushed to the front of my mind and a growl flowed through my lips as he snarled at the beta who had pushed a little too far. I knew deep down it wasn’t his fault. He hadn’t done it on purpose, and we were all going to make mistakes like this when we were still trying to figure things out.
That didn’t mean I was going to let him off too easily, though.
“Finally.” Fizzle huffed, interrupting and making us all brace for the incoming insult. “Well done. That was impressive, if not a little clumsy. I’ve been telling you to stop trying too hard. Feel the magic and let it go where you need it to be.”
“Erm, you haven’t actually said that,” Maddox pointed out as he came over to join us, patting my shoulder as if to reassure himself that I was still there.
Fizzle did his usual bluster as he puffed out his feathers and glared us all down. “I can hardly be blamed for you not understanding even the simplest of instructions,” he objected, clearly refusing to admit that he was wrong.
I could see Ryder getting ready to argue, but he was silenced with a shake of Alyssa’s head, who looked thoroughly amused about the whole situation. She was right that there was no point in arguing with Fizzle.
When you thought about it though, it was kind of scary that we trusted this little fur ball with our training and I was doubting if he did, in fact, know what he was doing.
“Was your entire childhood like this?” I asked Alyssa, as Fizzle sulked away, muttering about how useless we all were.
“Yeah, pretty much.”