Chapter 31
Evelyn
They found … something. In truth, I wasn’t focused on Lord Arctos and Carter bickering with everything else flooding my mind.
I’d slept with Ambrose Yarrow last night.
What was I thinking?
My veil cat growled as she prowled back and forth in the recesses of my mind. Alright, so some of us knew what we’d been thinking.
Ambrose got me in a way no one else seemed to. Not only since our blood magic accident—he had for some time, he just hadn’t known how to show it. Ambrose saw more than I wanted him to, but he didn’t press on my points of discomfort. He waited patiently for the best time to intercede.
Our passions for knowledge intersected in a complementary way, when we weren’t arguing over methods. Now that I understood his hangups, I knew his interest in blood magic was only further elevated by his complicated relationship with it.
All of it summed up meant that he pushed me to be the best version of myself—to own my place between fae and human.
I sighed. My mental summary did not make whatever was between us feel casual. Maybe the worst part was that I didn’t want it to be, either.
This morning, when I had announced to Arctos that we were in the same room together, I’d conveniently forgotten that Ambrose and I were competing for the Vesten historian position.
It changes things, right?
My veil cat was silent. So much for the animal always knowing.
Last night had felt wholly ours, wholly separated from our blood magic blunder, the competition for historian, and even my father. I’d felt safe, desired, and empowered to want something for myself.
I’d even ignored my own warning that wants never quite panned out for me.
What did Ambrose think? Did he regret our time together?
I met his hazel gaze, and any doubt of his desire fled when the golden color of his wolf cascaded across them. He looked ravenous.
My thighs inadvertently squeezed together.
So, we wanted each other. We also both wanted the Vesten historian position. I rubbed my temple. Where did that leave us?
“Evelyn, are you listening to me?” Lord Arctos asked.
“I was not,” I confessed with little thought.
Carter laughed, and it sounded light, carefree.
So different from the weight of our conversation yesterday.
He had shared more than he needed to, and I still wasn’t sure I understood why.
The secret of how the Vesten Point was chosen wasn’t information widely shared with anyone, let alone a half-fae library researcher.
The Vesten Court required a veil cat shifter. How long would it require one? Carter had the ability to travel between realms. What did that mean for me and my veil cat?
After our conversation, I had more questions than answers.
Part of me still wondered if Carter telling me meant he knew I was a veil cat, even though he’d said nothing about it directly.
I was running out of chances to ask the Vesten Point about the animal.
But the Vesten had taught me the lesson as a child: only discuss your shift with your family.
Even with my shift somewhat under control and the Vesten Point bringing up the topic of shifter forms, I still couldn’t bring myself to ask.
Especially since I now knew where my father was, it seemed most appropriate to ask him first. If he had no information, well, I’d cross that bridge when I came to it.
Lord Arctos repeated himself, maybe for the third time, and finally pulled me from my thoughts. “That young male over there seems to be staring at you quite intently. It seems to have raised Ambrose’s hackles.”
I turned where Lord Arctos pointed. The male wasn’t young. Well, maybe he was by Lord Arctos’s standards. He was the male I’d run from yesterday. The male Ambrose had seemed to indicate was waiting for me to visit him. Apparently, he’d tired of waiting.
“Oh, Stephen,” Carter said, waving casually to the male.
I turned to face him. “You know him?”
Carter tilted his head. “Yes, he’s the one who inspired me to fill the position of Vesten historian. He needed his family tracked down after waking from the mist plague. I wasn’t able to do it myself with my other responsibilities.”
I choked on … nothing. The news was what I’d run from yesterday. When I’d looked at my father’s face, some part of me had known he was miserable—I’d been too scared to learn why. Now Carter had casually dropped the fact I’d been dreading.
My father had woken from the mist plague.
It couldn’t be right. I shook my head, even though it was exactly what Mom had said. My mind spun. How could he have gone to one of the villages that just happened to be taken by the mist plague? “Are you sure?”
“About what?” Carter asked.
“That he was a victim of the mist plague.”
Carter cleared his throat. “Yes, I woke him up.”
My cheeks flushed.
“Is everything alright, Evelyn?” The Vesten Point’s voice was distant, though, like the fire crackling through my veins was now burning too hot for me to hear anything else. Only one thing cut through the white noise. Ambrose.
“That’s what he told you,” I whispered. “That’s what you didn’t think I’d believe.”
He rested his hand lightly on my lower back, showing his support. “I didn’t know if you would believe it, but I thought he deserved a chance to try and tell you.”
I nodded, still in a daze. “Can you explain to Carter and Lord Arctos?” I might have understood why Ambrose didn’t want to tell me, but I still wasn’t sure I was ready to hear this from my father. It seemed like I had few options on the matter, though, with him standing on Vesten House property.
Slow steps took me away from the group and toward the male whom I might have judged entirely incorrectly.
How could I have done so? I wasn’t rash; I had considered carefully where his deliveries on that fateful day would have taken him.
In fact, when I’d first gained access to a map at the Sandrin Records Office, I’d plotted the whole thing out.
The mist plague had not affected any of the cities he would have visited that day.
Maybe he deserves a chance to try and explain.
I probably wasn’t ready to hear it, but Mom deserved to hear whatever he would say.
At the very least, I needed to communicate how to find her.
I straightened my spine, like a warrior preparing for battle.
I touched my braid, remembering what Ambrose had said only last night about it being my armor.
The memory sent a flush of heat running through me as I crossed the lawn.
No matter what kept my father from us, it had been twenty years. I was entitled to my own feelings on that fact.
“Evelyn,” he started. “I know your friend told me to wait, but I couldn’t. I’ve been waiting for so long. If you need more time, that’s completely acceptable, but I need to find your mother.”
He took the words right out of my mouth.
“You didn’t leave us?” I whispered.
He shook his head before I finished the question. “Never.”
“But your route … I traced it.”
His head tilted, and then he seemed to understand the question. He opened his hand, and it held a diamond ring. “I wasn’t making deliveries the day I went missing. I snuck off to buy this for your mother.”
Suddenly, I was having trouble seeing. Something blurred my vision, but he kept speaking.
“I’m not sure how much you know about the fae, but we don’t marry like the humans do.
We take life partners, but it doesn’t have the same ceremony—or the same symbolism as the human act of marriage.
” He rubbed his hand across his face. “And your mom had never asked, but especially with you in the picture, with your fire magic manifesting, I wanted to offer her something human for our family. It was supposed to be a surprise.”
“You wanted to ask her to marry you?” Tears ran freely down my face now. “A fae wanted to marry a human.”
He shook his head a little, confused. “Not a fae and a human. Me and your mom. But now, I don’t know how long it’s been—I gather it’s been years.
I don’t know what her life looks like, or if there is still room for me in it, but I have to try.
I’m sorry if this steps on your decision to speak to me, but you’re my only lead to find her. ”
A whisper escaped my lips. “I needed you.” And once I’d said one thing, I didn’t feel like I could stop. “I needed you to teach me about my magic.”
Something broke in his expression, and a tear slid down his cheek. “I’m so sorry. I never meant for this to happen.”
Rationally, I knew that. The mist plague had been uncontrollable.
A natural disaster that still impacted more families than just mine.
Some for much longer. There were stories of those in the northeast who had awoken to find their families had passed away, because it had been hundreds of years since they fell asleep.
I knew I was lucky to hear these words, to have this chance, but I also didn’t know what to do with them. They didn’t change the fact that he hadn’t been there. I needed time.
“Mom is in Sandrin,” I said. “She works at Compass Books.”
Hesitantly, he put a hand on my shoulder, not coming any closer. “Thank you. I assume you need time to digest what I said. I’m sure it’s too late, but I’d be happy to tell you anything I know about your magic.”
I nodded. “I’ll be back in the city soon.”
He glanced over my shoulder. I knew without looking that Ambrose stood behind me, just out of earshot, even if the others were going about their business.
“I’ll make sure to leave word of how to find me with your Mom.”
I didn’t think it was a betrayal to say what I did next. In fact, I thought it would only speed along the happiness Mom deserved. “She’s been waiting for you. Even when I told her it was pointless.”
The words he wanted to hear landed, even as his face crumpled at my second truth—that I had not believed he was coming back. He nodded. “I hope to make it up to you. If you let me.”
Then he turned and ran, too eager by half to get to Sandrin. I’d been too overwhelmed by his words, by what he said, by the decision to share about Mom, that I hadn’t even thought to ask questions about my veil cat.
As he flung himself into the forest, he shifted. I saw his animal. He was feline, yes, but something in my stomach plummeted when it took shape. The cat that loped into the woods was all black.
He was a panther, not a veil cat.