Chapter Eleven
Leo
“It’s a no from me.”
“I’m twenty-four years old, Mom. You don’t get a say now,” I replied, shaking my head in frustration that we were having the same argument. That she still didn’t understand me. Mom slapped the dish towel down on the counter in frustration.
“Then why the hell are you tellin’ me about it?”
I closed my eyes, inhaling for five. “Because I want to share what I’m doing in my life. I thought you should know.”
She leaned against the kitchen counter and shook her head. “It’s all Charlie’s fault. You never would have gone down this route without him pushing you.”
I scoffed. “Are you kidding me? I found ways before Charlie even knew about it. If anything, he’s helped me do it safely.
You should be thanking him!” I raised my voice and my mother’s eyes widened.
I didn’t raise my voice often, I was pretty placid by nature, but I took no shit when it came to Charlie.
She would never understand why I was a bull rider. Would never understand the blood-pumping thrill, the sheer high that was on the other side of a successful run. I was a thrill-seeker. And only one other person understood it.
Mom had continually tried to get me to change career paths when I was younger.
Now I was a little old to start trying to compete at the level I wanted to but hell, it wouldn’t stop me.
She refused to let me compete in high school, then when I tried to join the college rodeo circuit, she nixed that as well.
When everything happened with Sherry, Charlie had asked me to stay.
He had kept his word. He’d tried everything he could to help me and I was so appreciative.
He convinced me to get rid of Wilson, insisting the old coot wasn’t out to help me but only cared about his own interests, which turned out to be true.
I discovered he was taking more than his fair share of my winnings.
Charlie introduced me to Frank Capron, my new coach.
Frank was a former champion bull rider who had to give it up due to one too many head injuries.
And typical of older bull riders, he refused to wear helmets to compete.
A few years ago, it became mandatory for anyone of a certain age to wear one, but not the older contestants; they weren’t required to if they didn’t want to.
The Grandfathers of Bull Riding, we called them.
You could always spot them, and not just by the scars on their faces.
They had grit, determination and an appreciation for the art and the animal.
I wanted to be that type of bull rider; revered.
Frank agreed to train me after watching a montage of all my wrecks. Painful for me to revisit some of those wrecks, given how close I came to serious injury sometimes, but I learned a lot from them. And it was my willingness to learn that drew Frank to me.
Charlie came to some of our training sessions and talked to him about me. Which bulls to put me on and trying to convince him to take me out on the circuit and get me on a tour.
At twenty, I won my first $1,000 and signed up for my PRCA membership card so it was official. But Mom wasn’t happy about the win, instead she was devastated. For her, it signaled not the beginning, but the end.
The Challenger Tour, which hit up multiple states, was starting in Texas in a few months and Frank was angling for me to compete in it.
He and Charlie had worked together to pull some strings and the spot was mine.
And I wasn’t going to let anyone hold me back, not even Mom.
I was twenty-four now; I didn’t need her permission.
But I still wanted her support.
“I just can’t risk losing you too,” she whispered brokenly.
My heart tightened in my chest as I looked at her. She always seemed so small and frail, so breakable now that I was so much bigger. Life hadn’t been kind to her, but I was by her side every step of the way, whether she wanted me to be or not.
She lost her husband and my stepbrothers had taken off.
Neither of us ever heard from them, didn’t even see them on social media.
It was just Mom and me. And sometimes I felt the pressure of being the only child around.
She leaned on me so much, it was suffocating, but I loved her and wanted whatever was best for her.
I sighed and tugged her into a hug, resting my chin on her head. “You’re not gonna lose me. I’m really good at getting away from the bulls when they toss me,” I joked.
She scoffed and slapped my arm, shoving away from me. “That’s not funny,” she muttered but her lip was lifting on one side. I could always tease a smile out of her.
I tucked my hands into my pockets. “It kinda was.”
She shook her head. “What am I going to do with you?”
“Help me prepare to tell Maddy that I’m leaving for Texas?” I suggested, bringing up the thing I’d been stressing about.
Last time I had the opportunity to leave and pursue this career, I stayed because Charlie asked me to.
At the time, it hadn’t been a tough decision, I wanted to be around Maddy.
She was my best friend, my better half and my soulmate.
Everyone thought soulmates had to be sexual or romantic partners but nope, my soulmate was my best friend.
Okay, sure, sometimes I thought about her like that but not for years. I’d shoved all that away when I realized that if I pursued anything it would ruin everything.
Besides, we wanted different things. I wanted a marriage and family eventually, and she wanted to live her single life with no attachments. And even if hers was still the best kiss I’d ever had, it didn’t mean anything.
Trust me, it didn’t.
Really.
But I was scared to tell her I was leaving and that I didn’t know when I would be back.
And not for the first time, I was pissed that there wasn’t a big enough rodeo circuit in Reverence.
Or Wyoming in general. It was always Texas, Colorado, Canada or hell, even Mexico and Brazil; they had huge rodeo circuits.
Why did my passion have to take me so far away from my person?
Sometimes I was tempted to ask her to come with me, but her life was here. Her family was here. Her career was here. She was so passionate about the good she could do by being a firefighter.
I glanced at my watch. Maddy had another fourteen hours on shift until I could go and pick her up. Usually, she messaged me when she was bored at the firehouse, but I hadn’t heard from her in a while.
We made a pact not to worry about each other in our careers. We’d both picked adrenaline-fueled, dangerous jobs. We understood each other’s reasons though, more than anyone else. And I tried not to worry about her so much, but sometimes the worry crept in. Like when she went quiet.
“Assuming you’re staying for dinner?” Mom interrupted, pulling me from my thoughts.
“Yes please,” I grinned. Living on my own was great but I hated cooking; I’d never understand people who enjoy it. And I’d stayed at the ranch too much lately so figured I’d give the Cartwrights a break.
She tutted but I knew she loved it really. I don’t think she was lonely, she had a new boyfriend, Derek. Psh, Derek. Sure, he was a little cheesy but he was good for Mom, so I liked him for her.
“Derek’s away at a conference this week so it’s been quiet,” Mom said as she started prepping food.
“Things going okay with Big D? Do I need to have the chat with him?”
Mom giggled. I loved making her laugh. “I know how sex works, thanks.”
I wrinkled my nose, faking a shudder. “Ew, no. I meant the chat about treating you right.”
“I don’t think so, I think he’s got it covered. In fact, how would you feel about me and Derek becoming more permanent?”
I hit her with some side eye. “How do you mean?”
She shrugged. “I want him to move in.”
I grinned, pumping my fist in the air. “Hell yeah, Big D!”
Mom scowled at me. “Please don’t call him that.”
“If Big D makes you happy then I’m happy for you. Doesn’t he need to ask my permission though?”
“To move in?” she waved a hand dismissively. “He’s not like a traditional suitor in your old romance novels.”
I sniffed. “Sometimes we could do with bringing tradition back, I think.”
“You’re so funny,” she shook her head. “Living in a romantic world and yet you think the best thing to do with your time is try not to get gored by a bull.”
“I have a one-hundred-percent success rate of not getting gored, so something is going well. And leave my romance books alone; the world could do with more romance in it.”
“Maybe you should take a page out of Big D’s book. He’s pretty good in the old romance department.” Her cheeks flushed a little as she washed the vegetables.
“Maybe I could,” I smiled. “Seriously though, if he makes you happy then that’s enough for me. I’ve only met him a couple of times, but he seems like a pretty neat guy.”
“He is.”
“Then I’m happy for you, Mama.” I pressed a kiss against her cheek.
“Thank you, Leonardo.”
“I hate it when you full-name me.”
“I know,” she teased. “So, have you seen any special ladies recently?”
I sighed. “Nope. But I have seen a whole load of unspecial ones.”
She gasped. “Leo!”
I shrugged. “You asked.”
“I just want to see you happy.”
I hesitated. “I am happy.”
“Good.” She began peeling potatoes. “You know, Maddy…”
I groaned, dropping my head back in frustration. “Don’t even start, Mama.”
She held up her hands. Potato in one, peeler in the other. “I’m sorry, but you’re just so close, it’s like you belong together. It’s hard not to think something would happen!”
“Well, it hasn’t.” Lie. “And I don’t want it to.
” Another lie. “Besides, I thought you didn’t even like her that much?
” It killed me how Mom felt about Maddy; she clearly couldn’t let go of my getting hurt at the ranch.
She thought it was Maddy’s fault, no matter how many times I said otherwise.
But now she’d seen what a pillar of the community Maddy had become, and I talked about how great she was enough that Mom was eventually coming around.