Chapter Eleven #2
“I do like her, I just don’t want to give up my baby to someone who doesn’t deserve you.”
“Well dang, isn’t that cute,” I joked. “And Mama, it’s me who wouldn’t deserve her.”
*
After dinner, I said goodbye to Mom, promising to let her know before I left for Texas. I checked my phone again and saw Maddy hadn’t replied to my message. The ticks were still gray and her WhatsApp said she hadn’t been active for a few hours.
My stomach clenched.
I’d felt weird all night and full of anxiety. But I didn’t want to chase her, didn’t want her to have to tell me to relax or calm down.
Is this how she felt watching me bull-ride? I didn’t want to put my anxieties on her and I knew I could trust her in her job. I needed to put this nervous energy into working out, get my mind off things until Maddy messaged me.
I went home to my apartment, a cute little one-bed above the Dough Re Mi bakery where the scents in the morning had my mouth watering. It was hard to live above a bakery and not eat there every fucking day; sometimes I had to train even harder just to work off all the damn pastries I ate.
My place was small but affordable. I made money from bull riding though not a huge amount, but Charlie supplemented it by paying me for any work I did on the ranch.
I felt bad about taking his money. I loved Redemption Ranch and would spend all my spare time there if I could, especially since I got to hang out with my best friend too.
It hardly felt like work, but I would be lying if I said I didn’t need the extra cash.
Because I wasn’t a bigtime bull rider yet, I wasn’t pulling in the big checks from events the way some of the others did.
If I wanted to provide for my future family, I needed to make more.
That’s where Challenger came in.
It was big winnings. High risk but high reward. And I was ready to take the risk. Eager even. I wanted to prove myself to the bull riding world. Prove that I hadn’t made a mistake all those years ago by not stepping up. Prove I deserved to be where I was and that I was someone to take notice of.
I looked around my little apartment. One day I’d give it up for a bigger one. Or a house even. A big one, for my future family. Maybe that would happen sooner than later if Challenger panned out and opened even more doors for me.
Grabbing my gear, I drove over to the arena which was open late for training purposes. I didn’t know if Frank was going to be there, didn’t message him because I was stressed over Maddy. I just wanted to be alone.
Maybe while working out, I would plan how the hell I was going to tell her I was leaving.
Part of me didn’t want to go, couldn’t imagine leaving her and being apart for the first time in sixteen years.
We’d been through a lot together and it had bonded us, like we’d stitched part of ourselves to each other.
How was I going to cope without seeing her every day?
Without going for coffee and pastries after each shift?
The arena smelled like leather and soap, along with bull shit. As gross as it was, I found the smell comforting, it felt like I’d come home.
The dark locker room lit up as I entered. I dumped my bag but didn’t change. I hadn’t really decided what I wanted to do, just knew I needed to get my mind off Maddy and all the things that could be happening to her right now.
I went out to the main arena and saw a couple of cowboys there with their trainers.
August was here too, practicing her barrel racing and I gave her a wave.
I headed over to the row of chutes where the bulls were lined up during events and noticed my old manager Wilson was there with his protégé, Dustin.
“Fuck,” I huffed. They had spotted me and were coming over.
“Well look who it is,” Wilson snarled, clearly still bitter about being fired.
I offered them both a tight smile. “Wilson, Dustin, how the hell are ya?”
Dustin nodded in my direction, not friendly but not not friendly either.
He had taken my spot when I chose to stay here instead of going to Texas.
Had learned from Willie Walken, one of the true rodeo legends.
Had come back with an ego the size of Texas itself.
He used to be a nice guy and I tried to tell myself that he still was, buried underneath all that arrogance.
“I heard you’re headed on Challenger? Finally getting to Texas,” Wilson said, then turned and spat on the ground. My stomach twisted in disgust.
“Yep.”
“Seven years too late if you ask me,” he snorted and hit Dustin in the stomach, like he was trying to get him to laugh.
I stiffened, trying to stay calm. I would not feel bad for giving up my career to look after the Cartwrights, my family, in their time of need.
“Better late than never,” I replied, refusing to let them rile me. “Besides, clearly did well for ol’ Dusty so guess it was a good thing I didn’t. I’ll be seeing ya,” I said, then waved and turned away.
I could hear Wilson shouting after me but I just kept going. He was trying to push me and Dustin into a rivalry that neither of us wanted and I wouldn’t let him win. I wasn’t like that, didn’t need to have a rival to make myself better. I had the determination and the passion.
I had enough on my mind without them interfering, so I opted to work out in the gym.
I ended up checking my phone every ten minutes to see if Maddy had messaged but she hadn’t.
My mood got worse and when I started getting rough with the weights, I knew it was time to call it quits for the day and head back to the locker room.
Only ten hours until I could go and pick up Maddy from her shift. Not that I was counting them down.
“Hey man,” Dustin said, entering the locker room while I was changing to leave.
I didn’t meet his eye, not wanting to engage. “Hey.”
“Uh, good luck on tour,” Dustin said, surprising me with his friendliness. “I know there’s this weird rivalry we’re being pushed into by Wilson, but, no hard feelings?” He held out his hand and I shook it.
“Thanks.”
Dustin scrubbed at his jaw. “So, uh, you and Maddy Cartwright, you’re not…” he trailed off, and my stomach crashed out my ass. Oh Dusty, you were doing so well…
“I…” didn’t know how to finish that sentence.
“Because I see you, at The Lonely Bison, with loads of other women so I just assumed. And you know. She’s a firefighter, and that’s super-hot,” he chuckled and my lip curled in disgust.
“We’re not a thing.”
It felt like a lie.
We were everything to each other.
“Great, I’ve heard that she doesn’t want anything serious which works for me. Can’t wait to take her for a spin, if you know what I mean.” He winked at me like we were two bros bro-ing down but that was not what was happening here.
“Dustin, talk about her like that again and you’ll be using your rodeo winnings to buy yourself a brand-new set of teeth, got that?” I cautioned, voice low.
He held up his hands. “Shit, man. I didn’t mean nothing by it.”
“Stay the fuck away from her. You’re not even fucking good enough to breathe the same air as her.” I shouldered past him before I put my fist in his face. I wasn’t usually a violent guy, but I was stressed, and he was talking shit about my woman. I mean, my best friend.
Shoving my bag in the trunk of my old Ford Bronco, I checked my phone again.
“Fuck sake!” I shouted when I saw she still hadn’t replied and hadn’t been on her phone.
Don’t do it, I told myself as I dialed Charlie.
“Hey son, I was just going to call you,” Charlie said when he answered. His tone was defeated, world weary, and it shot my anxiety to eleven.
“What happened to her?” I rushed out.
I knew it, I’d felt it all damn evening. Why didn’t I do something sooner? I tugged open the door to my truck and got in, starting the ignition.
“We’re at the hospital. The important thing is, she’s fine.”
“Charlie,” I warned.
“She’s shattered her hip and leg. She’s got smoke inhalation and her arm got burned up, pretty bad,” he added. A noise like a wounded animal left my throat. “She’s okay, son. She’s sleeping but I think she’d like it if you were here when she woke up.”
“I’m on my way.”
“She saved a kid, Leo. She saved a kid.” Charlie sounded in awe.
My throat closed up from emotion, torn between terror for Maddy and immense pride.
“That’s my girl.”