Chapter 3
CHAPTER THREE
Mark held me and we swayed slowly under the darkened dance floor.
The dress I had chosen to wear was soft and felt flimsy against the warmth of his closeness.
I wanted to stay in that moment, with the steady beating of his heart against my ear, but the song ended and he relaxed his hold on me.
I didn’t want to move but I managed to somehow.
“Thanks,” I murmured, feeling like my senses were still wrapped up in his hold and I was still trying to untangle them. His expression was unreadable.
“It was my pleasure.” The sound of his voice made a shiver race up my spine. His eyes stared into mine and I was lost. His eyes caught the glitter of the lights and they had never looked more striking.
“Um, yes.” I swallowed. My tongue felt tied. It didn’t help that none of my thoughts were coherent and if I kept talking I would make less sense. It was best to get away before I made a fool of myself. He remained on the dance floor as I backed away before hurrying to my table.
I had an excuse of getting my camera and made a concerted effort to concentrate on taking more photos of my family as they danced, ate and drank.
I loved to watch people and take photos.
There was something magical about catching someone in the midst of an emotion when they had no idea it would be photographed. A snapshot of a moment in time.
I got a few more of my brother and Sarah.
At first I had been more than skeptical of their budding relationship, but despite all those misgivings I had never seen him so happy and content.
The way Sarah looked at my brother showed she was in love with him.
I sighed, wistfully studying the photo I had taken of them.
Would I ever find someone I could love openly like that and have someone look at me that way as well?
After going through some of the photos, I realized I hadn’t gotten many of Sophie.
I got my camera ready and scanned the dining area but she wasn’t on the dance floor or at the table.
Where could she be? Then I spotted her in the corner by the entrance, speaking to Mark.
My hands shook with the camera while I watched them talk.
Not everything was about me, but I still felt uneasy while I kept my attention on them.
They didn’t talk for too much longer before Sophie walked away. When her eyes met mine, I knew their conversation had something to do with me. I knew her well enough to be able to read what she didn’t say out loud.
When she reached me, we sat down and I pretended to show her some of the pictures while we talked.
“Mark knows there’s something going on,” Sophie murmured, pointing at the picture on the screen.
Any hope I’d had that he was going to buy any of my lame lies went up in smoke.
“What did he say?” I asked, feeling irritated he wouldn’t leave it alone.
“He said he’s worried about you and wanted to know from me what was going on.” I was annoyed that he was resorting to trying to pump my sister for information .
“What did you say?” I asked under my breath as we continued to pretend we were looking through the photos.
“I just told him that you were dealing with your breakup with Jack. You know, the usual heartbreak stuff,” she murmured with a shrug.
“You didn’t mention anything about the keys and stuff?”
She shook her head.
I felt relieved but it would be short lived if Mark persisted. He wasn’t someone to let something go once his curiosity had been piqued and I wasn’t sure how to deter him. All I could hope was that I got the keys back from Jack and then no one would discover he had been living with me.
My phone started to ring. My eyes met my sister’s.
I checked my phone. “It's Jack.”
Sophie nodded. I answered it. “Jack.”
The line crackled. With the conversation and music, I was struggling to hear him with the weak connection.
I stood and moved outside, away from the noise.
“Tracy…can…hear-” The line went dead.
There were no bars on my phone. I glared at my phone, wishing I was in a better spot for cell phone coverage. Holding up my phone, I tried to see if I could get a better signal. It might be better to try from my room.
I let out a frustrated sigh before returning inside to my seat beside my sister.
“And?”
“The line was so bad I couldn't hear anything and then I lost signal.” I was beyond frustrated that I couldn't talk to Jack to sort out the misunderstanding.
I propped my head up with my hand and I found myself watching Mark.
He stood talking to Matthew and Sarah. I stared, unable to look away.
There was something hypnotic about his mannerisms, from the way he listened intently and how he smiled engagingly.
His eyes were always sharp, taking in his surroundings.
It was an inbuilt instinct from his job.
He lifted his glass to swallow a mouthful of his drink and I couldn’t look away.
“Tell me something,” Sophie interrupted me.
I straightened up, aware that I had let my guard down around my sister.
“You and Mark?” she asked softly, looking in his direction briefly.
“What about me and Mark?” I looked her straight in the eyes.
“There just seems to be… something there.”
Someone was bound to figure it out at some point, I was surprised it had taken this long.
I sighed. “Since high school.”I was usually quite open with my sister but for some reason I had never told her how I felt about Mark.
I remembered back to when it had first begun.
There had been an initial flutter of butterflies in my stomach the first time I met him when Matthew had brought him home the first week they had started high school, but it was only a couple of years later when I started the same high school that my feelings had progressed from physical to something more.
I had expected Matthew tobe protective but what had surprised me was how protective Mark had been as well.That plus catching him shirtless a few times working out had been enough for me to look at him differently. The same way I looked at him now.
“Is it that obvious?” I mumbled, feeling deflated.
“A little.” I wasn't sure I wanted her honesty. If she had noticed, had others?
“You guys are always bickering.” She shrugged, and I frowned.
“We don't. ”
She tried to suppress a smile. “Yes, you do. Honestly, you fight like a married couple.”
“Do you think anyone else noticed?” I questioned further, not sure I wanted the answer.
“I’m sure there are a few people who may suspect something but no one knows anything for sure,” she explained. “Or at least no one has said anything directly to me.”
“There’s nothing really to talk about anyway.” I shrugged dismissively.
“I’m surprised you guys haven’t gotten it on yet.” Her bold statement with a wiggle of eyebrows took me by surprise. I had never been brave enough to act on my feelings for him, I had just resigned myself to watching from afar. Never once had I even thought he might feel any attraction for me.
“Why would you think that?”
“There is chemistry there. If you look close enough you can see it. He never argues with anyone like he does with you.”
I thought about what she was saying but I couldn’t believe it.
“So, you think…you think he is attracted… to me?” I asked, feeling more confused by the moment.
She nodded with a knowing smile. I sat back, floored. She could be wrong. But what if she wasn’t? It was pretty unbelievable and difficult for me to see.
“No, I think you’re seeing something that isn’t there,” I disagreed.
She lifted a shoulder and dropped it. “We’ll see.”
I shook my head again, still unable to accept what she was telling me.
“Matt is headed in our direction,” Sophie mumbled, and I looked up to see our brother striding purposefully to us.
I scanned his features. He didn’t look mad but there was no guarantee he hadn’t found out what I had been trying so hard to hide.
Was it possible he knew? I felt the childish urge to run so I wouldn’t have to face up to my actions and his lecture, but I reminded myself I didn’t have to answer to anyone.
Even if I made mistakes, I was the one who had to live with them.
“What are you two up to?” our brother asked, coming to a stop behind us.
“I was just showing Sophie some of the shots I got,” I lied.
He directed his attention at me. “Can I talk to you for a moment?”
“I’ll go and see if Mom needs help with anything.” Sophie vacated her seat and Matthew took her place.
“What’s up?” I asked, swallowing nervously.
He reached out and squeezed my shoulder affectionately. “You need any ice cream?”
My heart warmed and I felt a little tearful at his thoughtfulness. “I’m okay.”
Matthew had always been involved in helping Sophie and me get through our heartbreak, which involved copious amounts of ice cream.
“No choc mint?” He raised an eyebrow.
“Maybe a little,” I sighed, putting my camera on the table.
“It’s never easy,” he sympathized with a sigh.
If he knew how difficult Jack was being, he would have a fit.
“What happened?”
I looked down to my lap for a moment before shrugging. “It just didn’t work out. We wanted different things.” Jack had wanted to stay in the relationship, and I hadn’t.
“How did he take it?” He was watching me intently and I was aware my brother had the same way of observing body language that Mark did.
I straightened in my seat, feeling uncomfortable. I frowned. “How do you know…?”
Sophie had been the only person I had told about the details of the breakup. With the rest of my family, I had never gone into the finer details of who had called time on the new relationship .
“I could see you weren’t as invested in the relationship as he was.”