Chapter 23 #2
He nodded, releasing my hand.
I got my purse and busied myself with putting my lipstick on to ease the spike of fear.
Inside his car, I fidgeted, unable to feel comfortable even though I was a passenger. Mark was a safe driver and I knew he had taken advanced driving lessons for his job, but that didn’t make me feel any safer.
My accident hadn’t been caused by me. It had been caused by another driver.
I kept a watchful eye on all the cars around us, feeling more and more anxious. Mark reached over and touched my hand with his fingers. “We’ll be there soon.”
I nodded, feeling my throat too tight to talk.
When he arrived outside Matthew’s place, I was relieved even though my legs were shaky when I got out of the car.
“You sure you’re okay?” Mark asked, not missing the telltale signs that I wasn’t.
“I’m fine.” I put my arm through his. “Let’s go.”
I made a point of concentrating on the evening with my brother rather than the car ride home. Maybe it was time to buy a bicycle .
My brother was stiff when he answered the door. Perhaps someone who didn’t know him would have been fooled, but I wasn’t. Mark and Matthew shook hands but I could feel the tension between them.
Sarah broke the tension when she came to hug me. “I’m so happy to see you.”
“Same,” I admitted, relieved she was there.
“You look amazing for someone who just had a serious accident.”
I shrugged, not wanting to really talk about it.
“Come on in.” She tugged my hand to the kitchen, leaving the guys behind.
She was busy making a salad and I offered to help. While I sliced the tomatoes, she chatted away.
“So, you and Mark?” she questioned.
“Yeah,” I sighed. “It was something I never thought would happen.”
“Not for some,” she replied cryptically. “I saw something between you two when I first met you at the hospital.”
I remembered it but I had been more worried about my brother than anything else. “Really?”
It felt like everyone had seen it, before I had realized it wasn’t just one-sided.
She nodded. “He’s a good guy, but you already know that.”
I nodded, unable to feel as confident.
“Matt seems to be coming around,” she murmured absent-mindedly.
I stopped what I was doing. “You think so?” I had believed the only reason he had set this evening up was to check on me, and Mark was just part of the deal now.
She smiled. “He loves you and Mark.” She frowned. “He doesn’t want to be forced to pick a side if things don’t work out because there wouldn’t be a competition. You would be the one who he would back. ”
“I wouldn’t make him choose.” I had already prepared myself for the worst-case scenario between Mark and me more times than I could count. There was no way I would allow it to damage the friendship they shared.
We all sat down to eat. We kept the conversation light and I felt like we were all tiptoeing around the fact that Mark was my boyfriend now, but I wasn’t going to make any waves. The smoother it went the better.
I shifted in my seat when I felt the familiar ache in my side, which I was still taking painkillers for.
“You okay?” Mark murmured, leaning closer to me.
“Yeah, I’m good.” I forced a smile but he wasn’t buying it.
He checked his watch. “Painkillers.”
I sighed. “Sure.”
He rose to get the bottle from my purse, and Sarah got up to get me a glass of water, leaving me alone with my brother at the table.
“It’s weird,” Matthew said, leaning back in his chair. “I expected…him to be the same as he is with other girls.” He paused. “But he is different with you.”
“I’m different with him,” I replied. “It means something with him.”
“I want you to be happy. It’s all I ever wanted for you.”
“I’m the happiest I’ve ever been.” And the most scared. I had so much to lose.
“As long as you’re happy, then nothing else matters.”
I smiled, feeling relieved he was prepared to put aside any reservations he might have. I put my hand to my aching ribs.
As if on cue, Mark returned with the pills and Sarah handed me a glass of water. I swallowed the tablets, hoping they would kick in quickly.
“Maybe it’s best we get you home,” Mark suggested when I struggled to keep sitting. I couldn’t sit and not feel like I was straining .
I nodded. We had accomplished the goal of the evening and the medicine was starting to make me drowsy.
Sarah and Matthew walked us to the door. Mark put his arm around my shoulders. It was the most physical affection he had shown me all night. I leaned my head against him.
“Thanks for the dinner,” I said to Sarah and my brother.
“I’ll call you later in the week,” Matthew told me, and I nodded. I left the coziness of Mark’s embrace to kiss my brother on the cheek.
He shook Mark’s hand. This time there was less tension and I was relieved. I had helped restored something that was important to me. It felt like everything was right in my life again.
When we got to the car, Mark tucked me into the passenger side and did up my seatbelt before walking around the front to get into the driver’s side.
“Feeling better yet?” he asked, and I nodded.
He gave me a dimpled smile that made my heart swell.
I didn’t know if it was just the moment, the effect of painkillers or the burst of emotion I felt, but I looked adoringly at him. “I love you.” It was out and there was no taking it back. It was the first time I had ever said those words out loud to anyone.