Chapter 31
Zoe
I walk up the path to the house that was my home for just over two months. There’s a big smile on my face—how can there not be? Bennett has invited me over, and I’m pretty sure I know what that means.
Though perhaps I shouldn’t get ahead of myself.
I ring the doorbell. It feels weird, but I don’t have a key anymore.
The door opens, revealing Bennett in a Santa hat, and I can’t help giggling. Other than the hat, he’s wearing his usual attire: dark pants, a dress shirt, and a serious expression. The Santa hat is at odds with those, and it’s delightful.
My chest squeezes. I’m immensely fond of this man.
“Hello,” he says.
It’s so nice to hear his voice after all this time. Okay, maybe two weeks isn’t that long, but it felt like a long time to me.
“I like your hat,” I say.
He merely raises an eyebrow.
I take off my winter jacket, toque, and boots. “So, why am I here?”
“You’re wearing the skirt.”
I look down. “Hm?”
“You wore it to work the first Monday you lived here. I kept…never mind.”
“Looking at my ass?”
“Now, Zoe,” he says, “you know I’d never do such a thing.”
Ha!
He starts climbing the stairs. “Follow me.”
My heart is hammering in anticipation as he leads me to my old bedroom and takes a key out of his pocket. Huh. Why is it locked?
That question flies out of my mind as soon as I step inside.
“Oh my god!” I say, my hands coming to my mouth.
The room has been transformed into a magical Christmas wonderland. The focal point is a large tree, which smells amazing. It’s decked out in multicolored lights and an assortment of ornaments, including the llamacorn and polar bear that I gave him.
“I put the tree in here,” he says, “so I can lock the door and Mittens can’t get in by herself. Though she hasn’t wreaked any havoc on the small tree downstairs, so maybe it would have been okay.”
A moment later, I hear a soft meow, and Mittens enters. Bennett bends down to pet her, but she ignores him and rubs herself against my legs.
“She’s been mad at me since you left.” He lifts a hand, then seems to realize he can’t run it through his hair because of the Santa hat. “Do you like the tree?”
“I do. It’s wonderful.”
“Do you have a tree in your apartment?”
I shake my head.
“Why not?” he asks.
“It’s an unneeded expense—I had lots of other things to buy—plus I knew it would remind me of you.” Much to my chagrin, there’s a crack in my voice. “But I think about you all the time anyway.”
“I’m so sorry.” He clears his throat. “I wish I hadn’t turned you down. I wish I hadn’t told you it was just sex—that’s a complete lie.”
“You were scared.”
“Yes, I was, even though I’d already decided to ask if we could make our relationship real. Then Clifton exposed the truth and insulted you, and the intensity of what I felt…that scared me. I might not have looked frightened, but sometimes, I’m a big scaredy-cat.”
My lips twitch. I can’t help it.
“Because I tend to associate those feelings,” he says, “with loss. I haven’t felt this way about anyone in a long, long time, and it was…
a lot. But I don’t want to be alone forever.
I want to love you—and not from afar. I want to wake up with you and make coffee for you.
I’ve even been using the mug you gave me. ”
Warmth spreads through me, but I don’t go to him, not yet.
“I want to go to sleep next to you and enjoy the changing seasons with you for as long as I can.” He reaches for me, then pulls back, as if he’s not sure he has the right to do that.
“What about your parents?” I ask. “They know the truth. You won’t mind—”
“No. They think we’re good together. They told me—like Gil did—that I’d regret it if I didn’t try to get you back, and they’re right.”
“But you’re not doing this just because it’s what other people think you should do?”
As soon as the words leave my mouth, I realize how ridiculous they sound. This is Bennett Chung, and he wouldn’t do something like that just because someone else told him to.
“Of course not.” He reaches for me again, then shakes his head.
This time, when he starts to pull away, I clasp his hands in mine. His skin is a little clammy. The fact that he’s nervous, the fact that he’s wearing a Santa hat and set up a tree with whimsical ornaments…
“What about Clifton?” I ask.
“I want to see him even less than I did before, but I won’t force our parents to choose between us. I know they love him, despite his many flaws, and as long as I don’t have to see him more than a couple of times a year, that’s fine. Of course, I wouldn’t expect you to—”
I press a finger to his lips, unable to wait any longer.
“Yes,” I say, “I still want to be with you.”
Then I stand on my toes and kiss him. He immediately wraps his arms around me and pulls me close.
His mouth moves urgently over mine, like it’s been a lot longer than two weeks.
When he tilts his head to adjust the angle, the pompom from his hat brushes against my neck, and I laugh.
He smiles against my mouth, then goes right back to kissing me.
God, I missed this so much.
“Again,” he murmurs, “I’m very sorry I hurt you, and I promise to do everything I can to make it up to you. I’ll even be the back end of a horse if you ask. When you showed up on my doorstep, I had no idea how thoroughly you’d upend my life—and now, I never want us to be apart.”
Unable to find the right words, I just squeeze him tighter. Usually, I’m the one who does more talking, but not today.
He kisses me again before stepping back. “I almost forgot. I have a present for you. Look under the tree.”
Not wanting to let go of him completely, I keep one hand on his arm while I reach under the tree with the other.
The gift is wrapped in shiny reindeer paper, and it’s tied with a red ribbon.
It’s just small enough that I can hold it in one hand.
In fact, the weight and size are similar to a present I gave him last month.
“Can I open it now?” I ask.
“Yes.”
“Really? You’re not going to make me wait until Christmas—or at least Christmas Eve?”
“No.”
“I thought for sure you’d be one of those people who don’t believe in early Christmas presents,” I tease.
“Just open the damn present.”
I laugh as I sit down cross-legged in front of the tree. Mittens takes the opportunity to rest her head on my leg, and Bennett kneels before me.
I untie the ribbon and slide my finger under the tape. It’s a plain white box, and inside, there’s a familiar llamacorn mug.
“For your morning coffee when you stay the night,” he says, “which I hope you’ll do often.”
I pull out the smaller package inside the mug.
Candy-cane hot chocolate mix. I’ve never had that before, but it does, indeed, look like just my thing.
Mittens seems to feel the same way. She tries to steal it from me, but I clutch it to my chest. She gives me an unimpressed look and walks out the door, presumably to take refuge in a cardboard box.
“Thank you.” I grin. “I love it.”
Bennett wraps an arm around me. “For a long time, I hated autumn. The Friday I was home when you returned from work? That was the anniversary of the accident. Each year as the leaves began to fall, I knew that day was approaching. It bothered me a little less as the years went by, but I didn’t enjoy it again until I met you. ”
“And I made you wear a wolf’s tail.”
“Admittedly, that part wasn’t my favorite, but I’ll do it a thousand times over. For you.”
“I’ll reward you,” I say, “by wearing the red cape.”
“Is that so?”
“With nothing underneath.”
He groans and pulls me onto his lap. I wrap my legs around his waist and press myself against him.
Mm. He feels so good.
“Zoe,” he says sternly.
“We’ve never done it in this room before. Maybe we should change that.”
I’ve barely finished speaking before my shirt has been tossed on the floor, followed by my bra.
He positions me on my hands and knees, shoves up my skirt, and slips his hand between my legs.
He hisses when he discovers that my panties are already wet.
After pushing them to the side, he slides two fingers inside me.
“Whenever I saw you in this skirt,” he says, “I dreamed of fucking you from behind.”
I squeeze my thighs together. “Bennett. Please.”
I hear him opening his pants and tearing open a packet. He enters me with one hard thrust. I lurch forward, then press myself back against him as he grips my hips and pumps into me again and again.
“I missed you so damn much,” he growls.
He leans over and kisses the side of my neck. When I turn my head, his lips meet mine. He keeps kissing me as he drops his hand between my legs and fingers my clit, and I cry out against his mouth when he finishes inside me.
I can’t wait to do that again.
Later, he makes us hot chocolate in our llamacorn mugs, and we enjoy it by the fireplace in the living room. While I’m snuggled up against him, I catch him up on everything that’s happened. Macy and Clifton. My mother. My friends.
When I met Bennett, I couldn’t have imagined such a cozy domestic scene with him, but right now, I couldn’t ask for anything better. It’s the perfect way to begin our lives together.
And this time, it’s for real.