Chapter 29 The Offer #2
“I often donate to Newbury,” he replied. “The Burke family have been patrons for generations—”
“Do you often influence the hiring too?” I demanded.
His jaw tightened, just for a second. I couldn’t be sure if it was the question or the interruption that annoyed him more.
“Certainly not. Faculty appointments are a function of the board—”
“Bullshit,” I spat. “You knew exactly what you were doing. How much did it cost?”
“I’m sure I don’t know—”
“How much did it cost?”
“I don’t know—”
“How much did you pay to get Richmond to choose me over a highly talented, qualified, and experienced teacher?” My whole body felt flushed and raw, and I could barely hear anything beyond the pounding of my heart.
His voice hardened, and he stepped forward so he could look down at me like a misbehaving child. “Melanie. That is a very serious—”
“Just be honest with me for once in your fucking life!”
“That’s enough!” he barked, cutting off my outburst. All traces of softness and concern melted from my father’s face, leaving him cold and severe. This was the face of Matthew Burke, CEO. Matthew Burke, Father, was gone, if he had ever really been there.
“I have been more than tolerant as you evaded your lineage. Paying your expenses. Permitting your nonsense. I would not suffer the shame of your failure. So, yes, I facilitated a position befitting your legacy. Walter was hesitant to dismiss his original candidate, but I understand that you have met expectations, and he’s happy to keep you. ”
The beige walls were closing in on me. My head spun as I processed his admission and tried to formulate a response. It was so much worse than I thought. Jack had been right all along. I didn’t belong at Newbury and never did.
“This is absolutely insane,” I said. “Jack already had the job and you forced Richmond to hire me? You can’t do that!”
Weeks worth of anxiety and exhaustion weighed me down.
But I kept my back straight and my chin up.
I might have cowered if we had had this conversation six months ago, but I wasn’t that girl anymore.
I was filled with righteous indignation, not just for myself, but also for Jack, who had, through no fault of his own, become collateral damage.
I needed to get Dad to stop meddling in my life. I needed to appeal to him in a different way. To turn the tables back around.
“Dad,” I started, my voice steadier than my nerves. “I know that you want the best for me—for the family.”
He nodded, and I took that as assent to continue.
“And I appreciate your support. But I’m an adult. I have been for a long time. And I need to follow my own path, bumps and all. You can’t pave the way for me.”
His gaze turned steely again. It was a mistake to tell him what he could or couldn’t do.
“You,” he growled, “are a Burke of the Connecticut Burkes. With that comes both privileges and responsibilities—”
“I don’t want special treatment!” I bellowed.
What little composure I had slipped away like vapor.
“I want to earn what I have, not just have it handed to me. I would love to teach at Newbury, but only if I’m good enough to get there on my own.
I can’t have you throwing around money and calling in favors.
No one will ever respect me! I don’t respect me! ”
“Would you like me to rescind the donation?”
I hoped this was a bluff, but knowing my father, it was more likely a threat. I thought of Ashley and her textbooks and new equipment that the cross-country team needed. “No. The school can use the money.”
My father smirked, and fresh fury flared in my chest.
“The school can keep your money, but I’m not accepting the job. Not like this. Not ever. I don’t need you patronizing me.”
His mouth flattened into a hard line. “Don’t be petulant. Using my resources to support my daughter hardly constitutes patronage.”
I took a step back. “If you refuse to pull your head out of your ass, then I think I’m done here. You can stay the hell away from me.”
His jaw looked like it might crack for how hard he was clenching it. “You are making a mistake. You are nothing without this name.”
We held eye contact while I zipped my coat and retrieved Alan’s keys from my pocket.
“Go to hell, Dad,” I said and slammed the door behind me.
Thoughts swirled in my brain like a centrifuge on the drive back to campus. This is what it must feel like to skydive and intentionally cut my parachute strings. For the first time in my life, I was completely on my own.
It was terrifying.
And exhilarating.
The weight of expectations which had smothered me my entire life was suddenly gone. I was light. And free. And that freedom was electrifying. It wasn’t the freedom to get everything I wanted, but it was the freedom to choose.
What I wanted more than anything was to choose Jack. There was a stabbing pain in my chest as he came to the forefront of my mind. He was something that all the money in the world wouldn’t be able to buy. In fact, trying to throw money at this particular problem would only make it worse.
I remembered the look of disdain on his face the last time he looked at me. I understood now, and I couldn’t blame him. He thought I had betrayed him and taken advantage of him. No wonder he was furious with me.
I, too, was angry on his behalf, angry at this whole broken capitalist system of haves and have nots, where people are fed the lie that hard work can get you anywhere. I finally saw what he knew all along—it was who you knew or how much money you had that determined whether you got ahead.
There was nothing I could do today to fix the system, but there was something I could do to make our situation right. He still might never speak to me again, but that didn’t change what I had to do.
I didn’t need Newbury, not like I thought I did.
I was drawn back here by a sense of security and convinced myself that a paycheck meant independence.
But I was wrong. Independence meant choice.
I didn’t want the security and prestige of Newbury.
I was in love with Jack and all I wanted was to do right by him, even if it meant giving him up.