Chapter 40
Nikita
“Here you go,” Calvin says from behind me, causing me to turn as he hands me a takeaway coffee cup.
“Gimme!” I reach for it quick enough to make him laugh.
“How long does it generally take for your personality to kick in once you’ve had caffeine?” He teases, looking at me over the rim of his glasses.
“Plus minus thirty minutes.” Taking a sip of the coffee, I can already feel the resistance to the fatigue that weighs over me. Calvin and I barely got any sleep last night with our late night talking and other fun activities.
We didn’t have sex.
But I wanted to.
Once he showed me what he could do with his fingers and tongue, I needed to experience what else he was capable of. Our physical connection is intense and at times, borderline desperate, but I am more surprised by how quickly we manage to develop a strong emotional connection through our simple understanding of each other.
Over and above that, he asks me questions that make me think. He challenges me in more ways than one - something my personality thrives off of. He shows me that beneath this detached demeanor is a man who deserves to be seen. Something more intimate exists now. A deeper understanding that wasn’t there before, and I can’t help that I’m becoming increasingly more fond of him.
And in a moment like this when he remembers my coffee order, he shows me he is capable of being thoughtful. The more he shows me, the more I struggle to remain immune to his many charms.
Which is exactly what isn’t supposed to be happening between us.
With one hand casually in his pocket and the other holding his own cup of coffee, he exhales a breath of air. He drops his head back, soaking in the sun shining down on us. We stand at the waiting spot for the next boat to arrive for the tour of the Bengali caves that we are doing.
“You look stressed.” I say, adding the teasing tone to my voice.
“I don’t get stressed.”
My tone turns dry. “Oh, of course. I forgot you were a cyborg.”
“A cyborg?” He brought his head forward, shaking his head with a smile. “You know those actually exist right?”
“They do not.”
“They do - well, a version of them at least. Your brother’s prosthetic is an example of current cyborg technologies.” He sips on his coffee, delivering random fun facts. “I told Jay that once and he then proceeded to refer to himself as ‘The Terminator’ for the rest of the day.”
I burst out laughing, “That Mary Jane of his has certainly helped him develop a sense of humor. Now, that’s someone who I can believe doesn’t get stressed anymore.”
He shakes his head, “Stress is essentially just fear. We just word it differently because people are more likely to respond with a level of understanding to ‘stress’ as opposed to fear.”
I open my mouth to argue with him, but quickly close it, registering his words and find there to be some truth to that. Only he will drop these unexpected one-liners that have me thinking about things in a completely different way. It’s oddly refreshing.
He steps forward along with the rest of the crowd that is being ushered towards the edge where a tour boat has since returned. I step quickly to keep up, the rest of the wedding party moving. Britney moves side by side with Violet and another woman that is part of her bridal party, but not someone I’ve met as of yet.
I turn my attention forward, hiding my gaze behind my sunglasses as I sip on my coffee. I am not one to psycho-analyze others, but people watching is my favorite pastime. It is easy to do that during my shifts and it is fascinating how much can be revealed about a person from mere observation. My attention landed on Kenneth who trailed behind his bride. There is nothing about his body language or facial expressions that tells me he wants to be here.
Calvin rocks on his heels. He looks effortless with his natural curly hair making an appearance, uncontrolled on top of his head. He has a pair of Ray Ban sunglasses on and his jersey is draped over his shoulders. Fuck, Rhodes is hot.
As if he hears me, his gaze snaps in my direction, holding me down to this reality and not the one that has arousal unfurling in my stomach.
“You good?”
“Huh? Yes, I’m good.”
“We don’t have to do this if you don’t want to.”
“I want to do this.” I shake my head, dropping my chin to look at him over the rim of my glasses, “I just need to not think about the fact we’re going to be out on the water in the middle of nowhere… far from the shore.”
“Is this supposed to make me excited or terrified?”
“Both?”
He lets out a light chuckle as he takes a sip of his coffee. I rest my hand on his chest, his attention returning to me instantly as the warmth of his skin seeps through his shirt. “You can squeeze my hand if you get scared, like you did on the plane.”
The corners of his lips pull into a smile as he shakes his head., “If you want to hold my hand, Nikita, all you have to do is ask.”
Nudging him, “Funny.”
His hand wraps around my waist, sending a surge through my veins as I feel his fingers brush under my shirt. My skin turns to molten lava at his touch. I lean into him, taking advantage of our forced-proximity because I want an excuse to brush up against him.
My eyes reach his, finding him already looking at me. He opens his mouth to speak, but the sound of a piercing whistle interrupts our moment, snapping our attention to the tour guide gesturing for us to get on the boat.
Calvin’s hand moves into mine, leading us towards it as if this movement is the most natural one between us. One of comfort and security. We move together as if we’ve been doing it for years. It fucking terrifies me. I am getting used to the presence of someone that won’t be around next week when we both go back to our lives - separately.
A thought that disappoints me deeply.
Even if I am not ready to admit that to myself just yet.
* * *
The shore continuesto distance itself from us as the boat zips across the water, the wind sending everyone with their hair down on a rampage mission to get control of it. I am happy with my choice to have two french braids on either side of my head, keeping my hair in tact.
Calvin and I sit at the bench by the front of the boat. We are pressed up against each other as we are forced to share it with Paul and one of the other bridesmaids who introduced herself as Lizzy, Britney’s friend from college. Calvin’s arm rests behind me, allowing me the opportunity to lay back against him, taking advantage of any opportunity there is for us to touch. He handed me orgasms on a platter last night and I’m struggling to think of anything else.
Nothing about this feels like a pretense anymore. We have passed that and stepped into uncharted territory.
I shake that from my mind and shift my focus to the exquisite panoramic view of the deep blue water surrounding us. Our enthusiastic tour guide’s voice comes through the speakers on the boat, “Any moment now, you’ll have a chance to encounter some of the region’s most playful residents - the dolphins!”
“How many will we get to see?” Britney gleams with excitement. There is something about her delivery that has me questioning how real this version of her is. I wonder if this is really Britney McCormick, or a version created for those around her.
“On a good day, we can see anywhere between twelve and fifteen. They often swim alongside the boat so keep an eye out.”
I am sitting against the side of the boat. I shift my body towards the water, resting my hands on the edge, leaning forward to see if I can see any in the water already.
“Careful there.” I feel his hands on my hips, “Your brother would kill me if I lost his sister to the sea.”
Britney’s excitement abruptly halts any response from me as she jumps to her feet, “I see one!”
People jump to their feet, me included as I zip my attention back to the water. My fingers wrapped over the edge as I lean forward, instantly rewarded with the view of a dolphin swimming just beneath the water alongside the boat.
“Here’s one!” I say with excited laughter, as I scan the sea, wondering how many are around us. Calvin’s arms come around either side of me, his hands resting on the edge as he traps me between his body.
“Where?” I feel his voice against my ear.
I tug at the inside of my bottom lip as I do my best to remain unphased by the feeling of his breath on my skin. The same skin that has a burst of shivers whenever he speaks. I point in the direction that I saw the previous one, but there is nothing there anymore. The boat slows to an eventual stop, leaving us to scan our surroundings properly.
One jumps in the distance catching our attention.
“Ladies and gentlemen, did you know that Dolphins use echolocation? How many of you have heard that word before?” He takes a moment to see if anyone will answer before jumping into an explanation, “It’s a biological sonar system, to navigate, locate prey, and communicate with each other. They emit high-frequency clicks and interpret the echoes that bounce back to form a mental map of their surroundings.”
Calvin shifts, leaving his arms still around me but his face hovering over my shoulder, invading my personal space.
Another dolphin burst through the water, a chorus of excited reactions traveling throughout the boat, including my own pointing and squealing.
I feel Calvin chuckle, his body vibrating against me. I lean back into him, “What are you laughing at?”
“You.” He looks down at me, an amused smile on his lips and something deeper revealing itself in his eyes, “You’re cute when you’re excited.”
Heat spreads across my cheeks at his unexpected compliment. I very rarely find myself in situations that leave me without words, but Calvin has my brain needing to play catch up whenever he catches me by surprise.
Paul’s voice booms around us, “Can we swim with them?”
Tony shakes his head, “When in a controlled environment, yes, but not here. Dolphins are generally friendly and curious but they are also wild animals. Sometimes, they may exhibit protective behavior, especially if they have young calves. Approaching a dolphin too closely may trigger defensive actions.”
Paul shrugs and turns to shout to his brother on the other side of the boat, “I’m sure we can take them. What do you think, Ken?” He stomps across the boat over to where his brother stands. Grabbing him by the shoulders, and turning back to Tony, “What if we jump in? You can’t stop us.”
Tony looks visibly uncomfortable and I don’t blame the man. Thankfully Britney jumps in, snapping at her soon-to-be brother-in-law, “Leave the damn dolphins alone, Paul.”
Kenneth shrugs his brother’s hands off his shoulders, turning back towards the ocean, “What she said.”
Tony saves the uncomfortable energy that settled amongst everyone with another fun fact. I am not listening, instead, taking in the view of the clear blue skies that scatters as far as the eye can see with the water running parallel.
“I think I’d pay to watch Paul get attacked by a dolphin,” Calvin says, causing me to snicker.
“There’s no reason any dolphin should be subjected to having to deal with that tool.”
“You’re right. That would be animal cruelty.”
We both laugh and I’m warmed by the sound of his laughter. What a sound - what a feeling.
The engine of the boat roars back to life as we start to move again, sending everyone off-balance. I stumble back but Calvin’s hand slides around my waist, pulling me closer to him, sending the breath right out of my lungs.
His voice is by my ear again, “I got you.”
My insides coil before bursting with a rush of arousal through my veins. I don’t just hear his words, I can feel them on me. Sinking beneath my skin, making their way into my bloodstream turning it molten.
I tilt my head, my eyes supposed to be finding his but get distracted by his lips that are just waiting there, waiting for me to sink my teeth into. “You just wanted an excuse to touch me again.”
“I’d be lying if I denied that.”
Calvin is being more forthcoming than he has ever been before and it sends logic into a spiral in my mind. What replaces logic is curiosity of what it will be like to see how this plays out between us. I clench my thighs against each other, the memory of his touch failing to help with alleviating the heartbeat between my legs.
“You’ll have an opportunity to swim in the ocean closer to the caves,” Tony’s voice shouts over the small waves, yanking Calvin and I back. “So those of you who would like to will have a chance. For now, get your last look at the dolphins before we move towards the Benagil cave.”
I notice movement in my peripherals as we all try to get another glimpse of the dolphins. Calvin and I remain where we are, enjoying nothing but the moment between us. The fresh ocean breeze surrounding us and with the view of the ocean ahead of me, I feel relaxed.
“Oh, no. I can feel I’m going to be seasick any moment now.” Violet’s voice pierces through my new found relaxation as she chooses to stand next to us. Not on the other side of the boat where she was originally. She made a point of heading over here and that makes my eyes roll. The relentless reminder of her presence is clearly deliberate and that sends frustration through me.
Frustration or jealousy?
That’s the real question.
“Shouldn’t you take a seat then?” I ask, dryly, keeping my attention on the view of the ocean in front of me.
“God no. That only makes it worse.”
Calvin makes no movement or contribution to the conversation. He simply remains where he is, not paying her any mind which has that jaw of hers clenching. Surely she can break a tooth doing that?
“Looks like someone forgot to shave,” she pipes up, trying to get Calvin’s attention which ends up working.
“Yeah, I know.” he shrugs.
“You’ll have to shave it for the wedding.”
The way she delivers that tells me that it’s something she has become accustomed to doing. I, on the other hand, am trying to figure out who the hell she thinks she is to dictate what he should or shouldn’t do?
“I like it.” I turn towards Calvin, my hand reaching up to cup his cheek, the prickly feeling of his growing facial hair against me. “I think it looks hot.”
His eyes drop to mine, the corner of his mouth pulling into a small smile, “Guess I’ll have to keep it then.”
Tony starts to usher everyone towards a seat again as the boat picks up speed. Violet disappears, giving me a small amount of satisfaction at Calvin’s choice to resist giving her the control she so desperately craved. It’s clear in the few interactions I’ve witnessed between her and Calvin that she had been in the driver’s seat of their relationship. Whatever she wanted, she got, and seeing Calvin going against her - even in a small way like he just did - is enough to send her reeling.
“So,” Calvin’s voice fills with amusement, “You think I look hot?”
My eyes narrow playfully, “Maybe, maybe not.”
“You can admit you’re attracted to me, Da Silva,” his voice is low enough for only me to hear, “I’d say you riding my fingers was a dead giveaway.”
He’s spot on, but this is Calvin and I won’t feed his ego. That will be too out of character for me and our relationship.
I shrug, “A means to an end.”
His head disappears into the crook of my neck, “Liar.”
I giggle and pull away from him, his breath on my neck still lingering. He is too easy to tease, “You do know women are capable of faking an orgasm right?”
I definitely did not fake any of my orgasms last night.
He laughs. “I was there. There was nothing fake about that and you know it.”
“Maybe, maybe not.”
We both laugh as I turn back to the water, giving myself a break from the growing tension between Calvin and I. There is laughter and chatter across the boat before a collective gleam of surprise escapes as a dolphin jumps out of the water, into the air for a moment before heading back down.
“Did you see that?” I exclaim, clasping my hands together in excitement as I laugh, “That was so cool!”
Calvin laughs, our eyes meeting but this time, he reveals something different in them. Something more.
“Don’t laugh at me.” Nudging him, “That’s mean.”
“No, it’s not.” I feel his face in the crook of my neck again, sending goose bumps across my skin, “It’s a good look on you.”
“Are you complimenting me?”
“I’m trying to.” He pulls his face back, allowing enough space for his eyes to reach mine. “But people don’t usually have to clarify it because it should be clear enough.”
“Maybe you’re not as articulate as you think.”
“When you smile like that, I don’t think I’ve ever seen anything more beautiful,” he says without hesitation. “Is that articulate enough for you?”
I gulp, my heart threatening to burst from my chest. His response takes me by complete surprise and I barely have time to catch my breath, “Y-yes, much better.”
“Good.”