Chapter 16 #2
Joker smiles, bittersweet. “Dad thought so too. I was lucky. It was a loving home. Liberal. Phantom and I went to the same school. We were best friends, even though we were literal opposites. Mom would joke that he was my shadow. But then, there was an accident.”
He becomes still. Clearly, there is much more to the story, but he’s not ready to tell it.
I reach out and lay my hand on Joker’s shoulder. I half expect him to flinch away, but instead, he leans into my touch.
After a moment, he continues, “After I lost my family, I was made into a Companion. I was terrified that I would be sent away to strangers, but Phantom demanded that I become his ward, and his pack had enough influence and money to make it happen. I lost my entire family, but I still had my friend.”
My brow furrows. “So, you’re only friends.”
Joker reaches up to touch his bond bite. “I don’t remember a time that I haven’t loved him. I mean, Phantom is his nickname from our time in the SEALs. Joker is a military nickname too.”
Bird stops eating. “What are your real names?”
Joker’s expression blanks. “The Beta who existed before Joker is dead. I don’t go by that name.”
“I’m sorry.” Bird ducks his head.
“What about Phantom?” I prompt.
“If he wants to tell you, then he will.” Joker edges closer to me.
I’m not sure what he needs, but I reach out and tangle my leg over his jittering one, which appears to calm him.
“Phantom could have treated me like property, but when I became his Companion, he continued to treat me like his best friend, you know? He never looked at an Omega or anyone else. I have always been all he’s needed.
He’s deeply, emotionally connected to me. I’m not some kind of toy to him.”
“I didn’t mean to…” Actually, that’s exactly what I implied. “I’m not someone who needs romance.”
“Well, then my skipper can be the romantic for the entire pack, but you can do the fucking because he can take or leave the sexual side. He loves me, I know that, but he doesn’t need more than handholding and gentle touch when he’s outside rut.
Why do you think he’s okay with my whole seduction routine?
We have an agreement that I may share my bed with whoever I like. ”
I’ve heard of Alphas like this, although they’re rare.
“Isn’t that hard?” Bird pops the last of the dry protein bar in his mouth and wipes his hands. “Because you’re one…help me out here, Ro.”
“Kinky brat with a masochistic streak…?” I arch my brow.
“Wow, called out.” Joker shrugs. “I’m independent.
I had to grow up fast and I’ve lived through shit that most people never experience.
I can fight my own battles and that includes finding people to meet my needs during my heats.
Although, because we’re outlaws, it hasn’t been easy.
I’ve become used to leading with deception.
I lie and wear a mask. It’s not easy to finally be myself. ”
“Are you being yourself?” When I scrutinize Joker, he squirms.
I hold him still, however, forcing him to face this.
“As much as I can. I may have forgotten what I am,” he admits.
That may be the most honest thing he’s said, and hell, does it resonate.
“I don’t know if I’ve ever known the answer to that.” I mirror his honesty with my own. “My Adonis pack hated that I was a Rogue from the moment I was born. Pretending that I wasn’t their daughter was just one of the many masks I wore every day to survive.”
Joker leans to capture my lips in a surprisingly tender kiss. “Want to go on a bloody revenge rampage, baby?”
Behind me, Bird laughs. “We’ve found your murder twin.”
I smile into the kiss and reward Joker, by deepening the kiss. “Maybe conversations like this are underrated.”
“Definitely,” Joker kisses me again, “underrated.”
When I slide my hand into the hair at the back of his head and tug, he whines. “But what about your Alpha’s ruts?”
Joker’s honey eyes darken. “They’re an issue. He doesn’t experience them the same as other Alphas. It’s why…”
“He’s feral. Mute.”
Joker nods. “In an emergency, when he’s losing control, I can trigger a rut for him with my Rogue Powers, and he can enjoy ones like those. He won’t seek them out but he can take pleasure from the sensations.”
Shocked, I let go of Joker’s hair. “Our powers are weapons.”
Joker leans closer, before he whispers, “Haven’t you worked it out yet? They are so much more than that. We are the missing dynamic. Hunted and feared. Because we are the strongest people in the world.”
Confusion mixes with a terrifying temptation at his revelation inside me, which throws me away from him and onto my feet.
He stares up at me, sadly.
I know that he’s only speaking the truth.
Except, if I accept that, then what will I do with the knowledge?
It could break everything.
Change the world.
But doesn’t the world deserve to be broken?
I bend over and snatch up a shirt from the floor, throwing it onto the bed. “Get dressed, Bird.”
“You’re leaving,” Joker says, flatly, as if he’s known that I was all along. “You’re leaving me.”
“I…” What can I say?
“Ro…?” Bird clutches the shirt to his chest but doesn’t move to put it on.
“I understand.” Joker looks away, trying to hide the devastation in his eyes. “But would it help if I asked you to stay? You like begging. How about if I begged? I can get down on my knees. I look good on my knees.”
Before I can stop him, Joker slips off the bed.
He kneels in front of me, hanging his head. His hair falls in front of his eyes, and he clutches his hands in his lap.
He does look good on his knees.
Bird makes a choked sound.
I clench my jaw. “We have a mission. Phantom and you saved our lives, however, which makes us even.”
“Even…?” Joker repeats, softly. “Huh, looks like I’m not as good at reading people as I thought I was. Is this the magician’s vanishing act? I didn’t know that you’d be doing it the morning after.”
“We’ll come back for you,” I find myself saying.
I promised to save the Rogues. I swore revenge on the Adonis pack.
If Joker was here as a lone Beta, then I would take the risk of inviting him into my pack. He’s bonded to an unknown Alpha, however, who I know nothing about apart from that he was prepared to buy his friend as a Companion, no matter how nice he was afterward.
Any Alpha who has been a Guardian is an asshole.
I won’t endanger Bird by waiting around any longer for the return of an Alpha who drugged him and took him prisoner. The only reason that I don’t intend to put a bullet in Phantom’s head is because he was shot protecting Bird.
But that doesn’t mean I trust him.
Joker shoves himself to his feet, stalking toward me. He backs me against the wall, caging me against it.
We’re both breathing hard.
Joker’s lips graze against mine. “Don’t expect Phantom and me to stop chasing you.”
“Don’t you dare stop because I won’t stop chasing you.”
“Well then, get out of here. We won’t stop the game. Where would the fun be in that?”
Bird is staring at us with wide eyes. “You’re both crazy.”
“Probably,” Joker and I reply in tandem.
Unexpectedly, the door crashes open.
Joker and I drop into a fighting stance next to each other.
A smoky, spicy scent of dark rum with a hint of cloves and nutmeg floods the room.
Phantom ducks through the doorway; his giant bulk barely fits.
In the cabin’s bedroom, his true height and muscled bulk is more obvious, even more so when he stalks toward the much smaller Beta.
Joker appears tiny next to him.
“Cool it,” Joker rushes to say. “I know that the prisoners are untied…and I’m naked…and it looks like they escaped and I fucked up or fucked them but…”