TWELVE
“Little One?” Daddy calls out, but I don’t pull the blanket down.
Is he really here, or is it my imagination playing tricks on me? The whole time he was gone, the fire alarm was blaring over and over in my head.
“He’s not actually here,” I mutter to myself. “You’re okay.”
I take a shaky breath in. I’m on the brink of losing i. All I can hope is Daddy will be here soon and hold me tightly against him.
“Little Pet?” he asks. “Why is the chair over by the kennel? Where are you?”
But his voice sounds so real. It sounds like he is in the apartment.
“Daddy?” I whisper, hoping he is actually here.
“Nora, where are you?” He raises his voice.
I stay silent, not wanting to play into the tricks my brain is playing. If Daddy were really here, he would know that I am in the kennel and come get me. He would wrap his arms around me and tell me that everything is okay, that I don’t have to worry about being alone ever again.
“Hello?” Daddy’s voice sounds panicked. “Where did Nora go? Can you look back on the feed and figure out where she is?”
Does he really not know where I am? Can he not see the lump in the kennel?
“What?” Daddy sounds so confused. “She is in the kennel? No.”
Silence fills the room.
“Yes, thank you,” he mutters. “Nora? Can you peek your head out from under the blanket?”
I hold onto my cover tighter, not wanting to look out. My brain must be really good at coming up with fake things. It sounds like he is actually in the room, waiting for me to follow his command.
“Oh, Little Pet,” he whispers. “Daddy is right here. I’m not going anywhere. You’re okay.”
Arms wrap around me, and I let out a little squeak as my body is moved.
“You’re okay.” He holds me tightly against him. “I shouldn’t have left you alone in the apartment. Daddy is so sorry for that. I should have insisted on staying or calling in instead of going into the office. Next time, I won’t make that mistake.”
Daddy very carefully pulls the blanket away from my head and looks down at me, a soft smile on his face.
“Daddy is so sorry,” he whispers and kisses my nose. “You’re okay.”
Tears run down my face as I stare up at him.
“I tried,” I gently say. “I tried to be brave for you and not make you worried.”
“Oh, Little Pet. You were so brave for Daddy while you were alone in the apartment.” He pulls me into his chest.
We sit like this for a while, Daddy holding me close and whispering sweet nothings into my ear as he helps me calm down.
“How did you move the chair across the room?” Daddy asks. “It must have been so heavy.”
“It was, but I didn’t want the door to close,” I mutter.
“How about I take off the door, so you never have to worry about that again. Or I could take the top off. If you really need to get out because of danger, you can climb out,” he offers.
“Climb up those bars?” I turn my head to look at the kennel.
Does he realize how hard that would be? They are almost taller than me, with nowhere for me to put my feet to hoist myself up.
And even if there were holes I could, I wouldn’t be able to with how weak I am.
Even though I’ve been here for almost two weeks, my body still has not gotten used to the gravity.
“Hmmm, you’re right. I’ll think about it. Maybe we can put a number pad on the kennel door. If anything happens, the security guard can tell you the code so you can get out,” Daddy continues. “I’ll think about it and figure out what would be best.”
I lay my head on Daddy’s chest and hold onto his shirt.
“I’m so sorry I left you here all alone. I shouldn’t have. Not when it’s been so soon since the fire alarm went off,” Daddy gently says.
“It’s okay. I told you that I was fine,” I force myself to say. “Everything was okay. I was perfectly fine.”
“You were not fine. I don’t want you to lie. You were shaking like a leaf when I found you,” Daddy replies. “Why were you in the kennel? I didn’t think you would go in there alone, especially not when I’m not in the apartment.”
“I didn’t have anywhere else to lie down.
The padding in there is really hard to pull out.
I figured if the door was always open, I would be fine.
But my mind kept playing the fire alarm over and over in my head.
It wouldn’t stop.” I ramble toward the end.
“But I was so brave, and I didn’t call out for help.
I stayed in my cage and was a good girl. Right, Daddy? Was I a good girl?”
I sound almost hysterical at this point, I can hear it in my own voice.
“Nora, I want you to listen to Daddy very carefully.” He cups my face and makes us look into each other’s eyes.
“I promise I tried really hard to be a good girl,” I whisper, my voice cracking. “I wanted to call you back so badly, but I didn’t want you to be mad or annoyed that you had to leave work because of me. You said it was important. I didn’t want to disrupt you.”
“Nora, Little Pet.” He wipes away the tears. “In that situation, I want you to call out and get me back to the apartment as quickly as possible. While I want you to be brave, I don’t want to force you to be so brave and go through your trauma alone.”
I open and close my mouth several times, but Daddy just shakes his head.
“If something like this happens again, I want you to call out and get them to contact me as soon as possible. I don’t want you to have to suffer alone.
That is not what Daddy wants,” he reiterates.
“I’m so proud of you for being brave and going through that.
But next time, call out. Daddy won’t be mad at you. ”
“But you were working,” I mumble.
“Work comes second. Do you know what comes first?” he asks.
I shake my head.
“You. You always come first. If you are so scared and traumatized, I want you to get the guard’s attention, so he can call me. I don’t want you to have to suffer through this alone. Do you understand?”
“Yes, Daddy.” I lean into his hand.
Will there be another time like this? Will I even be able to bring myself to call out for them to contact Daddy? I don’t want him to be disappointed in me.
“How about I feed you, and then you can take a nap,” Daddy suggests.
I shake my head. “I don’t want to fall asleep while you are here.”
“Then how about we learn some tricks?” He places me on the ground.
“I don’t want to do that, either,” I mutter and look away from Daddy.
Daddy hums and stands. “Even more of a reason to do it. I told you that you were going to learn some tricks. Some of them will be important when we have people visit us.”
“How?” I ask, sitting on my bottom and looking up at him.
“It will show your manners, and it will also show I trained you well,” he replies.
“What kind of tricks?” I ask.
“What do you think they are going to be?” Daddy asks as he walks over to the kitchen and grabs a jar from the cupboard.
I try to remember all the videos I saw of animals back on the space station. But the more I think about it, the less I can actually remember,
“I don’t know,” I whisper and look away.
Is he going to think I am dumb for not being able to answer that? I know what pets are and what they mean to humans, but I’ve never had one. We didn’t have them on the space station, no matter how much people wanted them. There was no way to get them.
“I am going to teach you how to sit on command, lie down on command, go to your kennel when I tell you to, and roll over,” Daddy says as he sits back on the couch.
My mouth falls open as I look at him. Daddy can’t possibly be serious about what he wants to teach me. Does he really think I am going to do that?
“If you follow my command, I’ll give you a little treat.” He holds up the jar. “Just while we are learning.”
I look at the small pieces of food in the jar and lick my lips. When was the last time I had solid food?
“What do those taste like?” I ask. “How do you know that I am going to like those? What if I don’t? Then there will be no incentive for me to do it.”
Daddy chuckles. “Smart, Little Pet. Do you want to try one before to see whether you like them? If you don’t, I can come up with something else, but I think you are going to enjoy these treats.”
I crawl over to Daddy and open my mouth, waiting for him to plop one in.
“I think you should eat out of my hand this time,” Daddy says as he holds one of the balls in his palm. “Use your tongue, and make sure that you lick my hand to get off everything.”
My cheeks go red, and I look at the ground. Did he really say to do that?
“Come on, Little Pet. I can see from how red your cheeks are that you like the thought of doing things like this,” he gently says. “I want to be able to feel your tongue on my palm.”
I suck in a deep breath and nod at Daddy, but I can’t look him in the eyes. He still hasn’t fed me the same way he did before, but this feels exactly the same, intimate.
Daddy lowers his hands, and I see the little treat in the middle of his palm. Sticking my tongue out, I lean forward and lick Daddy’s hand, scooping up the treat and slowly chewing on it.
Daddy leans back onto the couch and moans, and my eyes go wide.