Chapter 24
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
TYLER
“Holy shit,” Liam mutters, eyes going wide as we step onto the grass.
The football field has been transformed for the graduation ceremony. Hundreds of chairs are lined up, forming an arc facing a large stage, and the brass band is playing to the left, all of them dressed in their uniform.
I glance up at the stands, beginning to fill with family and friends, but there’s no point looking for mine because I know they’re not here yet. Joey texted to let me know Dad’s meeting ran over, and they’ll get here as soon as they can.
If they show up at all.
The numbness that settled over me last night hasn’t disappeared. I drove back to campus feeling empty, like I was nothing more than a hollow shell.
My phone burns a hole in my pocket beneath my gown, a painful reminder that I haven’t replied to Colby since yesterday.
He texted multiple times, asking how I got on and whether I got home, then again this morning asking if I was excited to graduate, and most recently, telling me he’ll be in the stands watching.
I couldn’t bring myself to reply because I don’t deserve him.
I tossed and turned all night, trying to think of a way we could make this work, but the reality of it is, I need to go back to Arizona and try to find a way where I can be the partner Colby deserves.
Someone who can support himself while supporting Colby as he achieves his dreams, and I can’t do that if he’s having to pay for everything.
And as much as I hate to admit it, I need to work for my dad while I figure it all out.
We’re led to the table where we check in and receive our name card, then head to our seats. The sun is blazing above us, and one of the professors comes around, passing out water.
“Please put your cap on,” she says as she hands me a bottle.
Nodding once, I force a smile and place the black cap on my head. Liam reaches over to adjust it, and I swat his hand out of the way.
“Cut it out,” I grumble. “I can dress myself.”
He laughs, the sound so carefree and light compared to the heaviness I’m feeling.
“I’m going to miss living with you,” he admits, turning to face the stage. “We’ve had a lot of fun over the years.”
My chest tightens at the earnest tone of his voice.
Since that night he caught me on my way to Colby’s, Liam has been checking in on me more than usual. I still think he suspects I have an unrequited crush on Colby, but he hasn’t mentioned it again.
I’ve tried to spend as much time with him as possible, as well as studying, sitting finals, and seeing Colby. He’s already got a contract waiting for him in Minnesota that’ll see him playing for their AHL affiliate team in Iowa, though I don’t think it will be long until he makes his NHL debut.
“We have,” I reply, a genuine smile crossing my face. “I couldn’t be more grateful that we were put together to share a dorm.”
Liam glances over at me, his eyes turning a little misty despite the wide grin on his face. “Will you come and visit me? Maybe you can come in the winter, and we’ll play some pond hockey.”
I snicker under my breath, remembering the last time we played pond hockey.
Liam ended up on his ass at the same time a bunch of snow fell from the trees and covered him.
We weren’t supposed to be on there, so I guess it only served us right, but we laughed so hard my stomach still ached the next day.
“As long as you don’t skate near any trees.”
He flips me off. “Open spaces only.”
My phone vibrates against my thigh as Liam’s attention is pulled to people behind us. I gather up my robe and slip my phone out of my pocket, and my heart lurches at the sight of Colby’s name on the screen.
Colby
Hey, I just got to my seat. I can’t find you because everyone looks the same from this far away.
I wanted to tell you I’m proud of you, and I’m so lucky to have you in my life.
I know you’ve probably been busy getting ready for today, and seeing your family, but I’d like to come over later, if that’s okay with you.
We don’t need to have sex, though I wouldn’t say no. I just…
I hold my breath as the three dots bounce on the screen, indicating he’s typing.
Colby
I just want to be with you. I haven’t seen you in like 24 hours and I already miss you like crazy.
Is this what being in love feels like? Going bananas whenever you spend time apart, like you can’t function properly without them?
Because that’s how I feel about you, Ty. And don’t say anything about bananas, okay? I haven’t been able to eat one since.
Anyway… I guess I’ll stop blowing up your phone now. Don’t trip up when you get on the stage. Bet you look hot in your gown.
The screen blurs as tears fill my eyes. My hands are trembling, thumbs shaking over the keyboard of my phone, but I have no idea what to say.
How do I tell him that I’m in love with him, but I can’t be with him until who knows when?
He’ll tell me that he doesn’t care if I don’t have a job or any savings to support myself.
He’ll say that as long as we’re together, that’s all that matters.
But I’ll care.
It matters to me because I refuse to be another person who takes advantage of Colby’s kind heart.
Sucking in a shuddering breath, I blink the tears from my eyes and type out a response.
I miss you too, Colbs, and thanks for being here. Knowing you’re out there means more to me than you’ll ever know. I’ll come and find you after. I’ll try my best not to fall
As soon as it shows as delivered, Whilton U’s president takes to the stage. I slip my phone back into my pocket and try to focus on the fact that I’m about to graduate, instead of the excruciating pain radiating in my chest.
“Tyler!”
My spine stiffens at the sound of my dad’s booming voice. Gritting my teeth, I turn around and greet my parents with a tight-lipped smile.
“You made it,” I state in a cold tone.
Joey frowns, and I catch a flicker of what looks like shame in his eyes as he glances over at my parents.
“You know how it goes,” Dad continues without a hint of empathy in his voice. “When there’s a deal to be made, you have to strike while the iron’s hot. Wasting time loses money, and we don’t lose at Beckmann Capital Trust Group.”
Mom places her hand on my shoulder and presses her cheek to mine in a kiss. “Congratulations, darling.”
“Thanks,” I grumble, tucking the leather folder I was handed onstage under my arm.
Joey pulls me into a hug, slapping my back as he tells me how proud he is, something I notice my parents still haven’t said, and any hope of hearing them say those words dies when my dad takes out his phone to call their driver.
I try not to let my disappointment show, but then my eyes land on Coach Vaughn heading my way, a wide smile on his face.
“There he is! Whilton U’s saving grace in the regionals,” Coach Vaughn says, giving my hand a firm shake. “It’s been an honor to coach you over these last four years, kid.”
Heat travels up my neck, and I can’t stop myself from smiling.
“Thanks, Coach.”
“I mean it. Your dedication is to be admired, not just the work you put in to improving yourself, but to look out for your teammates too. You’ve been a valuable member of the team, and I wish you all the best in whatever the future has in store for you.”
A knot of emotion crawls up into my throat, and I quickly blink to ward off the tears that threaten to form.
“That means a lot, Coach. Playing for you has been one of my greatest achievements, and I’ll never forget it.”
Coach Vaughn grins, clapping a hand on my shoulder.
“Make sure to collect your gear before you leave. I’ve had your jersey cleaned, and it’s hanging in your stall for you to take, along with a small token of my appreciation,” he says. “Take care, Becksy.”
With that, he steps around me and makes a beeline toward Liam. I’m watching Liam wrap his arms around Coach with tears falling down his cheeks when I spot Colby weaving through the crowd. His head is tipped down, mouth twisted in a tight smile as he acknowledges those who recognize him.
I’m about to open my mouth to call him over when my dad speaks.
“You won’t be needing any of your hockey equipment, so let your coach know before you leave to donate it or throw it in the trash.”
My head whips toward him in shock.
“What?”
“You heard me. I’ve already told you that you won’t have time to play anymore.
There’s a lot to learn, and you’re going to need to learn fast because I’ve got a lot of clients in mind who will be great to add to your portfolio,” he says, and then his phone pings with a notification at the same moment Colby appears beside me.
Ignoring Colby’s presence, my dad continues.
“Our driver is here to take us to the airport. Don’t forget the removal company will be with you at 10:00 a.m. tomorrow, and a car will pick you up at eleven thirty to take you to the airport.
” Then with a smile that doesn’t reach his eyes, he claps a hand on my shoulder, the same one Coach Vaughn had touched only minutes ago, and lands a painful blow.
“I’m so proud to have you at Beckmann Capital Trust Group, where you belong. ”
It’s like I’ve forgotten how to breathe as I watch them walk in the direction of the exit.
I’ve desperately wanted to hear those words from my parents for my entire life, but not like this.
Not when it’s wrapped up in ownership. Like a transaction instead of love.
“Was that your parents?” Colby asks, his voice quiet beside me.
“Yeah,” I reply in a whisper.
Colby steps in front of me, breaking my line of sight where I’ve been staring off into the distance. I have to squeeze my eyes shut because I can’t bear to see the sympathy swimming in those hazel eyes.
“What a fucking asshole.”
Swallowing roughly, I open my eyes again and tip my head, motioning for him to follow me. We’re silent as we walk out of the football stadium and into the parking lot, where I left my car.