23. Candice
23
CANDICE
Telling Nathan about my parents doesn’t feel strange. Normally, I do whatever I can to avoid talking about it and I especially dislike discussing how they died. It brings the jagged edges of my grief closer to the surface, and I always get afraid that people will see them poke through. But telling Nathan about them almost feels…right. Like it’s information he can be trusted to handle.
And standing in front of his family’s front door together also feels oddly fine. Normal, almost. Like he’s no longer my enemy, but has instead become a friend.
A friend who is also teaching me how to have mind blowing sex.
I’m saved from meditating on that thought any further by the door swinging open, and a tall woman with hair the same color as Nathan’s greeting us.
“Did I know you were coming?” she asks, crossing her arms.
“No, Cassandra, you didn’t. You can pretend you’re happy to see me, though.”
Cassandra, who must be his older sister, pulls him in for a hug, and then steps out of the way so we can come inside. The house is warm and snug, with pine plank walls and throw rugs everywhere.
“This is Candice Wilson,” Nathan says. “Beau’s sister. We were delivering a horse and by the time we got to driving back, the snow had started. We’ll be staying the night, or until the roads are passable again.”
“Sure, of course. Cam and Riley are here, too.”
We follow Cassandra into the kitchen, where an older woman in a floral apron is spooning batter into a pan.
“Hey Ma,” Nathan calls.
“Nathan! What a nice surprise. Aren’t you supposed to be busy with your community service?” She comes over to him and hugs him, just like his sister did. Up close, I can see the resemblance. She has chestnut hair flecked with strands of silver, and her eyes are the same shade of blue. But Nathan must look like his dad too, because his face has stronger, sharper lines than his mother’s.
“This is Candice,” he says, pushing me forward. “She runs the horse rescue, and we were on a work trip together today. So I’m getting community service hours for this entire day.”
“Candice? As in Wilson? We’ve heard so much about you from Beau over the years! But Nathan always said the two of you didn’t get along so I thought we’d never meet you! I’m Susan.” His mom pulls me in for a hug, not seeming to notice or care about how stiff I am as I hug her back.
I can’t remember the last time I hugged someone who wasn’t Beau or Jenny, but Nathan’s family is definitely touchy. It’s nice. It reminds me of my grandma.
“It’s nice to meet you,” I say. “Nathan has uh…” I trail off, unsure what to say. Because Nathan hasn’t told me much about them and I’m not even sure what Nathan and I are to each other at the moment. “Nathan speaks so fondly of you and the ranch.” There, that’s believable enough. “We’re really lucky to have him helping out at Star Mountain right now.”
Nathan quirks a brow at me, like he can see right through me. I shrug a little, hoping to communicate that I’m not even completely lying—having his help has kept the barn running.
“Candice has been teaching me how to train the rescued horses,” Nathan supplies.
“That’s nice, sweetie,” his mom says. She dusts flour off her hands and slides the cake pan into the oven. “But don’t you have to spend time working with Ballantine and Salvador as well? How do you have time for all of this?”
Nathan darts his eyes at me. Across the room at the kitchen table, Cassandra looks up from her phone and skewers her brother with a look that says she knows he’s hiding something.
“I’m taking a bit of a break from working on reining at the moment,” he says.
“Oh, Natey, I hope you aren’t letting what happened at the bar stop you from competing,” his mom says. “You love competing.”
Nathan sighs and looks like he wants to argue with her, but he just says, “It was time for a break anyway.”
Cassandra knows her brother well, because she steps in and says, “Let’s get you two settled in your room. I assume you don’t have any things with you, so I’ll get you both some extra clothes.”
We’re halfway down the hall before I realize that she said room, as in singular.
Does Nathan’s sister think that we’re together? As in together-together?
The idea is so laughable it makes me actually laugh, though I cover the sound with a cough. Cassandra shows us the bedroom and then Nathan and I are left alone.
“Um,” I say. “Are we both sleeping in here? Does she think we are a couple?”
“Cassandra is probably trying to figure out if there’s anything between us, and this is her way of doing it,” Nathan says. “She’s crafty like that.”
“Well now I know why you’re so good at handling me,” I huff out.
Nathan steps towards me, and gently pulls me against him. “You aren’t used to being handled, are you Viper?”
“No,” I say. “I’m used to being in charge.”
“You can take charge of me any time you want,” he says. He leans in and his lips hover above mine, the promise of sin and seduction hanging in the space between us.
Images of Nathan on his knees in front of me fill my head—it’s an image I became familiar with the other day and I’m finding I like it a lot.
“Tell me what you want me to do to you later, Viper,” he says.
“Where would the fun in that be?” I say, mostly because I’m too nervous to tell him what I want. Despite the past two days, I’m still inexperienced Candice Wilson who has only had one boyfriend and he’s still Nathan Booth, charming, charismatic playboy.
“You like making me work for it, don’t you?” He leans in and brushes his lips against mine, featherlight—a whisper of what’s to come. “That’s okay. I’ll work harder than anyone else ever has for you.”
My insides melt at those words, and I wrap my hands around the back of his neck hoping to encourage him closer.
“If you stay in this room with me,” he whispers, “you can have my hands and mouth all over you.” His lips skim down my neck and I shudder. “Also, with all my siblings in the house, this is the only spare bedroom.” He chuckles against my skin and I join in.
“Well in that case, count me in,” I say. “You’re sleeping on the floor, though.”
“Not a chance. I’m a spoiled rodeo champion, remember? I need a soft bed and three-hundred thread count sheets or I can’t sleep at all.”
I roll my eyes at him, but I also smile. I look around the room for the first time since entering it. Nathan and I were so immediately wrapped up in each other that I didn’t spare a glance for the room.
In the center is an enormous bed covered in pillows that is definitely a new addition, as the rest of the room is filled with things it seems like he’s had since high school. There’s a guitar in the corner, a few posters on the walls, and a closet propped open that is stuffed with old flannel shirts and dusty boots. A twin bed would fit in better with this stuff.
“This is cute,” I tell him, holding up a Magic 8 Ball I find on his desk. “Did you ask it about your high school crush every night before bed?”
“I didn’t need to. I already knew she wanted me. Pass it to me,” he says.
I toss it over and he looks down at it and says, “Will I make Candice Wilson come three times tonight?” He shakes it and then reads, “ ‘Outlook good.’ Told you so.”
“Don’t count your chickens before they hatch. But seriously, why is all this stuff still here? I mean, I get it. I still have all my high school stuff, but you’ve actually gone out and done things in your life, unlike me.”
“I never cleaned my room out, and then once I started training and competing in reining, I was hardly ever here. A few years ago, I replaced all the beds in the house and gave my mom money to redo the kitchen and the living room. But I never got around to doing anything with this space.” He shrugs, like it’s nothing that he was able to do all that for his family. Like his financial support isn’t important.
A few things about who Nathan is finally click together: he’s worked so hard to collect buckle after buckle and endorsement after endorsement because it helps take care of his family. Yes, he wears thousand-dollar boots and has a collection of jeans to rival a shopping mall, but he’s clearly supportive of his family. He’s been supportive of me, too. He’s offered me help when I needed it and took me up on my crazy proposition.
“Hey Nathan?” I say quietly.
“Yeah?”
“You don’t have to uh, teach me anymore if you don’t want to. I mean, I want it to be as pleasurable for you as it is for me.”
Nathan tips his head back and laughs his great big, charming laugh. “Honey, that breath of a kiss we shared a minute ago has me hard as a rock. I’m enjoying it plenty. More than you know.”
“Well, okay,” I say. “That’s good.”
“It is,” he says. “Our rela—our arrangement suits both of us.”
His words strike me as odd, but I guess he’s right. This is an arrangement, not a relationship, and I should be happy it’s working out as well and as mess-free as it is.
“Great,” I say. “Would you mind if I took a nap in here? I’m tired from freaking out in the car. And I should call Beau.”
“Of course,” Nathan murmurs.
He dips out of the room and leaves me alone. Normally, I’d be happy to see Nathan leave a room. I’m able to think better, and more clearly, when he’s not around.
But for some reason, I feel strange. Like now that he’s gone, I don’t know what to do with myself.