Chapter 62
Sixty-Two
Drozel
Of course Lessa had a razor. She used it for cutting leather, but had no problem sharpening it and loaning it to Sylis. While she worked on that, she asked if I'd mind giving her a little space that afternoon, then had looked over at Meri pointedly.
Yeah, I could figure out what that meant.
So, the moment she was done, she loudly told me to take the razor home and use it well.
Meri, who was in the middle of sewing something, wanted to know what Sylis would need it for, so I told Lessa she could explain shaving - possibly over lunch or something - then headed back.
After all, a good man knew when his girl needed a little help setting up a first date.
But back at my house, that razor led to a somewhat awkward conversation with Omden and Sylis.
I tried to get Omden to admit whether he thought Sylis looked better clean-shaven or with a beard.
Omden said that was up to Sylis, and completely refused, but the number of times he gave me a pointed look?
I was pretty sure my partner liked gold things too.
So, while Omden showed Sylis where the supplies he'd need were kept, I headed out back to light the water heater.
There were enough banked coals in there the flow would be warm by the time he needed it, and a few new logs only guaranteed it would last all day.
But instead of heading back in, I claimed one of the chairs in the backyard, kicked my feet up on the other, and waited.
Not even fifteen minutes later, Omden made his way out. "He's going to try cleaning up the edges. I pointed out that if he hates it, he can shave the rest, but growing it back will mean another week of waiting."
"It does look good on him," I said, moving my feet in a clear invitation for Omden to join me. "Makes him look a bit less like a Mole."
Omden sat, then leaned back and put his feet on my thighs. "So you like both of our Moles, hm?"
"I mean, Sylis isn't an unattractive man. He's also your type, Om."
"I am not the one who was trying to seduce him," he countered.
"Nope," I agreed. "You were just trying to protect him, shelter him, and be all gentle and sweet with him. You know, like you are with me."
"And like you are with Meri," he said.
I shrugged, neither admitting nor denying it. "If I say she's pretty, does that mean you'll tell me what you think of this one?"
Omden lifted a brow. "I'm waiting."
So I blew out a breath, knowing he was giving me shit.
"Yes, Om, she's pretty. No. Shit, that's a lie.
Meri's fucking beautiful. A different sort of beautiful than Lessa, but just as nice.
One is power and the other grace. And yes, Meri's so damned sweet it's almost sickening, but also refreshing.
I am also not about to ruin anything for Lessa. "
"Now tell me what you think about Lessa," Omden said with a smirk.
He was being a little smartass now, but it was cute so I let him have it. "I like how easy things are with Lessa. I fucking love how she just wraps you up in this thing we're doing. Shit, she's the one who keeps wanting to wait for you! I didn't expect that, but the three of us? I don't know."
"We work," Omden said. "Face it, Droz, Lessa's the spice you need to balance my boringness."
"You," I insisted, "are far from boring. You are a sexy, amazing, brilliant, and sweet man. You, Omden, are my stability, and I need that."
"You need the chaos too," he said. "And I'm not trying to make you feel bad about it or get you to give me some reassurance, baby.
Trust me, I know we work. I know you love me.
I used to worry I wouldn't be enough for you, and in some ways I'm not.
But you didn't leave. You didn't get sick of me.
You fucking talked to me, Droz, and this? You having your lovers? It works."
"Yeah," I said. "And I feel greedy all the time, but that guy?" I tipped my head toward the house. "Om, I'm going to throw something out there, and I don't want you to brush it off before you think about it, okay?"
He scoffed. "Sure."
"Sylis is not going to be looking for someone to bend him over and make him scream.
He's not going to want to fuck instead of talk.
That man is more like those girls than I expected, but it makes sense, and you know what?
I saw your hand on his leg. I know you well enough to know you like the way he looks, even this scrawny. "
"I want to feed him up," Omden admitted.
"Yeah, me too," I agreed. "But what I'm saying is I'm pretty sure Sylis is gay.
Not bisexual, polysexual, or anything else.
Sylis seems to be only interested in men, just like you.
I also love you enough that I do not want to feel like my time with Lessa is taking something from you, or that I'm being greedy when you deserve more.
So, if he does spark your interest, or if you decide to give him a little explanation about things - or any other reason you can think of, because I'm literally pulling this out of my ass right now.
.." I paused, watching his face carefully to see how he took my next words.
"I think it's sexy when you get cute with him.
I give you my word that if it turns out to be more than just cute, I'm okay with it. "
"Droz..." he tried.
"I'm not talking about a sexual thing," I promised, knowing that was what he was trying to resist. "And if it does turn sexual? Fuck, you deserve it. I'm just saying I see how you are with him, Ommy."
He chuckled at the nickname. "I think Lessa's corrupting you. Seems everyone's calling me that lately."
"Only when you're exceptionally cute," I promised.
"Look, to put this bluntly, we both know you're not after sex.
You want a connection first, right? Well, I don't think we're going to lose ours.
I won't let that happen. I do think Sylis is going to be looking for the same thing, too overwhelmed to throw himself in someone's bed, and that man has a long road ahead of him.
He has to work through his shame, Om. You know, like you did. "
"Which is a good point," Omden relented.
"So, how about this? I'll consider it - and I won't promise anything else - if you actually consider Meri?
Stop saying you're going to scare her off, because you clearly aren't. Stop telling yourself you're going to mess things up for Lessa, because that woman can handle her own shit.
Stop making excuses because you feel guilty about having more lovers than just me and wrap your thick head around the fact that I love you no matter what, okay? "
"You," I told him, "are the most amazing man in the world."
"I am," he agreed slyly. "I mean, since I managed to catch you, that proves it."
I let my eyes run across him. "And here I was trying to start something with you this morning. Want to take a little afternoon nap with me, Ommy?"
He groaned and rolled his eyes. "I have no clue how you can still be horny! I know Lessa rode you hard last night, and you're still not satisfied?"
"Practice makes perfect," I assured him.
"I've spent my whole life building up my tolerance or something.
" And I waved that off with a laugh. "No, I think we'd horrify Sylis if we tried something like that - even if it was for a real nap.
" And I flicked my tail up and around his leg.
"I just wanted to make sure you know I'm okay with this. "
"But can we trust him?" Omden asked.
Which meant he was thinking about Sylis.
Not the same way I would, but my partner wasn't like that.
He cared about knowing someone more than anything else.
Beauty, brains, and everything else took a back seat to personality.
He was drawn to the connection, not the orgasms, and it was the best thing about him.
Somehow, this man made me feel like I was always seen.
Like he stopped and listened, no matter what.
The relationship I had with him was so intense in some ways, and never what anyone expected, but I wouldn't trade it for the world.
He was my lifeline. My rock, or safety net, or any other metaphor I could think of.
Which was why I needed to make sure he was thinking about this now. Something in our house had shifted lately, and it wasn't just because of Meri. It had happened before Sylis got here. I couldn't figure out which thing to put the blame on, but the crazy thing was I liked it.
When Omden had asked Lessa to act like this was a trial partnership, it had taken me by surprise, but it convinced me he liked it too.
She really was a nice addition to our relationship.
But now that she and Meri were starting something, and it seemed like it was working out well, I'd almost expected her to move on.
"You just took a mental vacation," Omden said softly, snapping my attention back to the present.
"Sorry," I said, because he was right. "I was just thinking it wouldn't surprise me if Lessa ended things with us."
"For Meri?"
I nodded. "She's crazy over that woman, and it sounds like it's working. There's been some kissing, some cuddling, and a whole lot of 'getting there' between them."
"Yeah," Omden said, dragging out the word, "but I'm not sure Meri wants monogamy, Droz. Just think about it. After what her husband did to her, and then seeing her best friend find happiness with those three? Why wouldn't Meri decide having options is safer for her?"
"What do you mean?" I asked.
"Well," he said, his tail flicking wickedly beside him. "If Lessa loses her shit and goes off on a rant, Meri knows you'll put yourself between them. If, as an example, you tried to hold her down and have your way with her, what do you think Lessa would do?"
"Shit, she'd kill me," I said, seeing where he was going. "Never mind you. I'd be lucky if all I lost was my tail!"
"Exactly," he agreed.
So I decided to play that out just a little more. "I wonder if the same would be true for Sylis."
Omden's head twitched. "Huh? Why?"
"Because," I said, rubbing Omden's leg gently, "I'm pretty sure that man's a virgin.
Male or female, Om. He's thin, weak, and pretty much helpless right now.
Sure, he's stronger than Meri was when she got here, but I'm not convinced he's stronger than her now.
Physically, I mean. Mentally, that woman has him beat, hands down. "
"I agree with you there," Omden said.
So I kept going. "Which means all of this?" I gestured above me. "Lorsa, Dragons, the Moles coming back - because we know they will one day - and the stares of the people here? All of it, Omden, is going to be a lot for that man to handle. He didn't even know about antibiotics!"
"I know," Omden agreed. "They have electricity, but not penicillin?"
"Yeah," I grumbled. "Shows you their priorities, huh?
But Tobias made a point of telling us about him.
I get the impression this guy is looking for a connection.
A friend, a lover, or who knows what else.
Shit, he probably doesn't even know, but if he's anything like those girls, he's going to be just as scared of it as he is desperate for it.
I mean, he's spent a lifetime unable to touch anyone else.
No hugs, no kissing, no hand-holding, or any of it!
And now, he's here, thrown into our mess and trying his hardest to give us a reason to trust him. "
"I actually do," Omden said. "I know Zasen wouldn't, and I'm sure you'll try to say I shouldn't, but I think he's really everything he's showing us."
"No, I agree," I assured him. "I also think Zasen's a paranoid fucker sometimes.
I'm just an insensitive ass." And I grinned, making it clear that was mostly a joke - and a little self-awareness.
"But do you think Sylis would feel a little more confident experimenting in this new culture around him if he had, I dunno, friends to watch his back?
A few, and if they happened to rein each other in as well. .."
"Just like Meri," Omden said, nodding to show he was keeping up. "Okay. I won't rule out your kestrel, but you can't rule out the sparrow. Deal?"
"Cross my heart," I told him, making a little X over my chest. "And Ommy? I actually like the idea of you having someone. I mean, you definitely deserve it."
"I deserve you," he said. "I managed to catch a hunk of a man with a heart just as big as his muscles."
"Dick," I corrected. "You were supposed to compare that to my dick size, Om."
"Nah. I was trying to say you have a big heart, Droz."
I caught his legs with one arm and shoved in, heaving him over my shoulder. "Asshole!" I laughed. "Now you're going to pay for it."
And he didn't try to break free. His tail hooked around my back, his arms grasped at me, and the love of my life laughed in a way I couldn't get enough of.