23. Crack In Our Souls #2
“If that were possible, I’d own stock in both and be a wealthy man.” Dean comes to a stop next to me and hikes a brow. I shake my head and keep talking. “I’ve got a couple things I need to take care of. Let me know if you need anything.”
I can tell she’s feeling a little bit better, because she throws her sarcasm at me. “I already told you what I need.”
“I know what you need and it’s not that,” I mutter.
Dean lets out a low whistle.
Ruby lets the sarcasm go, which only means she’s thinking of orgasms and things that go with them—namely my cock. She lowers her voice. “Payne...”
I smile and do not whisper. “Rubylicious.”
Dean gags.
Ruby clears her throat. “I’ll see you later. And thank you.”
I tell her the truth. “I can’t fucking wait.”
“So you’re back together?” Dean asks before I slide my cell back into my pocket. “Just like that?”
I shrug. “We have things to work through, but as far as I’m concerned, those things don’t matter.”
He turns to me and crosses his arms. “You still don’t know why she left?”
I turn away from him and focus on the team digging through the rubble. Someone unearths a ceramic bowl and blows off the soot. “She’ll tell me when the time is right.”
“That’s not how I saw this happening. You’ve been ... well, you ever since she cut you out for good.”
“But she’s back, Dean. She’s fucking back and she’s not going anywhere. It’s been twelve years. We’re different people than we were then. When I say it doesn’t matter, I mean it. All I want is her.”
“Grew up with you both. I’ve watched you love her and pretend to hate her.
I’m saying this because you know I’ll always have your back—it matters why she left.
In some shape or form, it matters. But I also know her.
She would not have left on a whim. Prepare yourself, man.
I have a feeling it’s going to be fucking big. ”
Ruby
When I walk through the front doors of the Deacon estate, all I can think about are the many times I’ve crossed this threshold. I almost grew up here. My favorite part of the school day was coming home with Payne since my mom worked for his family.
And now this enormous place is his. The estate, the grounds, and the protection it will give me and my family when we need it most.
But the memories—they’re all mine.
The good and the bad.
Blake carries his bag and Grandma’s as he shuts the door behind him. “I remember those summers when Ruby had to babysit me so Grandma could work, and we’d come here. I thought it was creepy at first.”
“Try living here,” Payne states. “It still feels that way at times.”
“It was never creepy unless the grownups were around,” I amend. “Leave it to grownups to ruin everything.”
“Speaking of the grownups...” Grandma is not one to be chill or polite. “Is your mama here, or are the rumors true that she moved away and is licking her wounds in Europe?”
“Here we go,” I mutter.
Blake helps Grandma with her jacket. “I thought we talked about this. You agreed to be nice.”
Grandma puts her hands on her plump hips and turns to Blake. “Nice my booty. I’m just asking what we all wanna know. It’s not my fault I’m the only one who has the gumption to say it out loud.”
I hook my arm with hers to lead her farther into the house. “How many times have I told you not to believe what your friends from church say about people? Payne said his mom is here, so she’s here.”
Payne ignores all talk about his mom. “Who’s hungry? It’s Sadie’s day off, but when I told her yesterday you all were moving in, she came back to cook for us. There’s food in the kitchen.”
“I couldn’t eat another bite if I tried,” Grandma says.
Carl and Winnie delivered more food than we could eat to the hospital this afternoon.
He even made Grandma a special sugar free cobbler.
“I could use a good night’s sleep after last night and all day in the hospital.
Consider this your warning—if you try to pick and prod me, I will come at you.
I’ve had enough doctors and nurses for the year. ”
“I’ll only pick and prod you if your blood sugar drops so low you pass out again.
” Payne bites back a smile and holds out his arm for Grandma.
“Come on, Ms. Sinclair. I’ll take you to your room if you promise to make yourself at home.
You’re on the main floor so you don’t have to climb the stairs.
Blake, you’re on the third floor, first door on the right. ”
“If I try to make myself at home, I’ll get lost in this place,” Grandma says and turns back to look at me. “If you can’t find me in the morning, send the cavalry, Ruby.”
“Goodnight, Grandma. I love you,” I call.
I watch Payne lead her through the kitchen to one of the main floor bedrooms. He takes his time, lets her lead, and looks like a gentle giant next to the woman who has been a constant in my life.
The back of her hair is singed on the left.
I washed it this afternoon at the hospital and used a pair of medical scissors to try to even it out for her.
It’s a good thing she’s got I don’t give a fuck old lady syndrome.
Anyone else would be in tears at the state of her hair.
Blake waits for them to disappear around the corner before he turns to me. “I’m happy you and Payne are back together.”
I cross my arms and shrug. “We have things to work through. I’d say together is organic at this point.”
Blake looks at the spot where Payne led our shuffling grandmother. “I’m going to say this with all the love because I want the best for you. Make it work. He’s a good guy, but I’m also selfish. I don’t want you to leave again when this is over. I’ve missed you.”
I cut the small distance between us and wrap my arms around him. “I’ve missed you too. And I agree, Payne is good to the core. He always has been. Things are different now. I’m not young and scared or stupid.”
Blake proves he’s the biggest teddy bear in history. I always wonder if he would’ve turned out as good had Mom not left him with Grandma. What I do know is her absence didn’t hurt him. He’s the best possible version of himself. “Love you, Ruby.”
I smile. “I love you too. We’re both sleeping in tomorrow. Carl found someone to work at the Combover for the next couple of days so I can get settled after the fire.”
Blake lets me go and picks up the duffle of donations from the fire department. “I’ll see you in the morning.”
When he takes the stairs two at a time and rounds the corner toward the third level, I find myself alone in the Deacon estate, just like the very last time I was here.
Only today is so very different. There’s nothing to be afraid of and no reason to run. It’s not lost on me I’ve had to do that twice in my life. But this time, I found myself right back in Payne’s arms—the only place I’ve ever wanted to be.
The entryway soars. The decorative molding on the ceiling sits somewhere between the second and third floors. I think of the laughs and screeches of two innocent children from another decade who only had each other.
And Payne was the only person I ever needed.
I wander through the dining room and formal living room. Not much has changed other than maybe a new sofa or two.