17. Chapter 17
Fitz
L ight streamed through the open drapes, leaving me annoyed. I always drew them before I went to bed. Of all my spoiled tendencies, sleeping as late as possible was high on the list. My back ached like a steel spike had been jammed against it most of the night. I twisted in my bed, or at least I tried to. A weight held my body in place and I smiled, remembering when my cat used to sleep on me when I was a young boy. I would wake up to a face full of brown fur and a purring companion who was ready and waiting for breakfast. I squinted as the haze in my eyes cleared. I wasn’t in this room back then. I had a smaller space on the other side of the palace, closer to the playroom and nursery. I’d moved to my suite when I finally accepted my fate to rule as the future king of Nolcovia. My slow mind registered my sitting area, the cold fire, the mess of brown fur on my chest, just like when I was little.
Except.
My cat, Cuthbert, had been dead for five years.
Coco.
The previous night rushed back. And not a second too late. A knock sounded on my chamber door. “Your Highness, I have your breakfast. Are you decent?”
Molly was the sweetest of the house maids, but prone to gossip. If she saw Coco, the entire country would know by lunch and the story would spin out of control.
I shook her shoulder. “Coco, you must wake up. Please.”
Maybe it was the shock, maybe her back hurt as much as mine did from sleeping on the couch, or maybe she heard the absolute panic in my voice, but in the next breath, her head popped up. Eyes dark with smudged makeup, hair sticking out at every angle with curls frizzed in opposite directions, I still found myself staring at her beautiful face. Without any effort, I could slip my hand along her jaw and bring her lips against mine.
“What’s going on?” Her unnerved response brought me out of my impulsive thoughts.
“Your Highness? It’s getting cold,” Molly tried again through the door. “Are you hurt?”
“We fell asleep,” I practically hissed the reply. “But no one can know you were here.” Without thinking, only in desperation to save both of our rears, I pushed her off the couch.
Bad idea.
A small squeal popped out of her as she plopped on the floor. “Fitz!” Coco stared up at me, eyes fiery and frustrated.
“Prince Leonidas, I heard a fall.” Molly wasn’t waiting any longer. “I’m coming in.”
Gripping the blanket with both hands, I cast it over Michaela like a net, caught the back edge of the couch, and launched myself over. The second my feet hit the ground, Molly made it inside, breakfast tray in hand, eyes wide with fright. I jammed my hands on my hips and forced a smile into place. I wanted to look normal, but what was normal anymore? The maid stuttered in her steps, eyeing me like an attraction at the circus. I cleared my throat and forced my nerves down.
“Morning, Molly. I trust you slept well?” I’d never asked her anything of the sort before and she definitely took note.
“Your Highness? Your brow is sweaty and you’re out of breath. Are you ill? Should I fetch the doctor?”
“No,” I stepped forward and took the tray from her hands to set it on the table, “just doing morning calisthenics.”
Her eyes widened farther, which, all things considered, I didn’t think was possible. “In your nightclothes, Your Highness?”
“Sure.” As if to prove it, I dropped to the ground and cranked out two push-ups. “No time like the present, right? Hop out of bed and get to it.”
Behind the couch, Michaela giggled under her blanket.
“Did you hear that?” Molly started past me, headed for the sitting area. “It sounds like a tooney hawk or a silver-breasted squirrel.”
I pushed to my feet, knowing I had to intercept her. “It’s just the fireplace. It makes a weird whistling… giggling sound sometimes.”
“My father is a sweep. I can look at it for you.” She started for the fireplace. My heart did a full backflip as I spotted the lump of a blanket monster crawling backward toward the secret tunnel.
“No!” Michaela’s body collapsed flat under the blanket, just inside the double doors. I threw my arms wide to block Molly’s view and bar her way, acting like I’d gone completely barmy . “I wouldn’t want you to spoil your dress.”
“Oh, that is kind, Your Highness. You think of what I don’t.”
I nodded and stole a breath before I had a heart attack. Motioning for the door, I said, “I have taken too much of your time already.”
Her brow wrinkled with confusion. “I couldn’t possibly leave now, Your Highness. I haven’t tidied your bed yet.” Molly took two steps inside the bedroom and paused, pointing at the lumpy blanket on the ground. “Wasn’t this by the couch a moment ago?”
“Uh—no, different blanket. I have so many. Spoiled rotten. Would you like one?” As I ushered her toward the door, I snagged a blanket from the oversized chair and pressed it into her arms. “My treat.”
“Your Highness,” Molly protested so much she nearly dropped the blanket, “this is highly irregular.”
“Actually,” I kept leading her toward the door, “I’d like to start making my own bed now. This competition has me rethinking things, and I should have more responsibility.”
Molly turned back to face me. Behind me, the escaping Michaela thudded to the ground again, but the chamber maid was too enthralled with her own thoughts to notice.
“It’s Lady Gwendolyn, innit? She’s so beautiful and, even though she’s noble, she’s one of the people too.” Her eyes danced with delight. “Are you going to marry her? That kiss was,” she actually sighed as though she was reliving it herself, “so romantic.”
“It’s early.” I needed to soften my answer, but talking about the last woman I kissed while the woman I fantasized about kissing was escaping my room was more contradiction than I could process properly. “I suppose time will tell.”
When her face fell with disappointment, my guilt returned full force. Not only did I have to worry about breaking Gwen’s heart, but also the hearts of the whole kingdom as well.
“Thank you for your time, Molly. You always have such an eye for detail. You deserve a raise.”
“Oh, Your Highness! The generosity!” She clapped her hands over her mouth. “Really? It would help so much! If there’s anything more I could do, say the word and I’ll—” The high-pitched whine of the passage hinges stopped her midsentence. Bending to peer around me, she took one step in that direction.
Needing to save my skin and Michaela’s reputation, I took Molly by the shoulders and stared her straight in the eyes. “I’ll double your rate if you please just leave now.”
Shock took hold first, followed by happiness, but I definitely didn’t miss the faintest hint of suspicion. “Yes, Your Highness. Right away.”
I didn’t take a breath again until the door was shut and the lock firmly in place. Palm against the door, I inhaled slowly, concerned my heart couldn’t take much more.
“I take it you don’t have a lot of experience hiding girls in your room?” She stood facing me from the doorway of my bedroom, blanket over her arm.
Though she was clearly teasing, my male brain took over, sprinting full force in the wrong direction. Fantasies about hiding with Michaela under that blanket rushed my mind. Our joined hot breath refracting off our skin, bodies tangled together, her hands… I cleared my thoughts, shook my head, and crossed the space between us.
“Safe to say, no, I don’t.” My finger came up to interject a point. “But you have an alarming talent for staying hidden, and I feel like you’ve neglected to tell me about a few tales from your romantic history.”
“Oh, some stories are just too good to tell, Fitzy.”
“And how will this one rank?” I couldn’t help but ask, despite the way she profaned my nickname.
“Hmmm, sleeping over with the Crown Prince… that’s got to be in the top ten at least.”
My fingers linked with hers. The slightest tug was all it took to pull her closer. “Not even the top five?”
Her coy grin could be used to extract secrets from spies because it left me unhinged. “I’ve led a crazy life, I guess.”
“I’ll have to step up my game then.” My gaze dipped to her lips again, lost in the fantasy that had bled into my mind a moment ago. Reason gripped me like a hidden alarm. This wasn’t a date. She was my friend and I had to remember that. Clearing my throat, I tried to set things straight. “Thank you for last night. It meant a great deal to me.”
“Always.” Her delicate fingers grazed my jaw, making me want to turn into her palm. “Now, you have a date to get ready for. And she’s a catch, so don’t mess it up.”
“It’s not like I plan to—”
Another knock resonated a second before the knob rattled. “Your Highness, are you secure?”
Reginald. Couldn’t I have a moment’s peace?
I pulled Coco’s hand and half-hurried, half-jogged her toward the open mouth of the hidden passageway. I started to close the door when she stuck her head out, grinning.
“Tell me about everything later?”
The knock became more insistent.
“Yes, of course. Now, go.”
“Bye, Fitzy.” She winked and an overwhelming desire to kiss her goodbye took hold.
Thankfully, the painting that served as a door was secure before it became overbearing.
I stared at the frame, breathing hard.
What was wrong with me?
Blair waited by the car, in a thick woolen coat and furry boots. Thankfully, her father wasn’t slated to drive us. I got along well with him, but the idea of having her father along for our first date was enough to send me into panic.
The producers wanted me to play up her new title with a theme for the date, their compromise for my choice of a born-commoner, I suppose. Truth was, I didn’t know what ladies did to occupy their time, other than shopping and pampering themselves.
From that idea, the day took shape.
After a full afternoon at the spa and then a decadent lunch at one of my favorite cafes, we ventured to a jewelry shop that had created my mother’s favorite items in her collection. The bell jangled overhead as Blair entered with me.
“Why are we here?” she asked with caution.
“I noticed you don’t have much jewelry, other than your new bracelet, of course.” I nodded at it dangling on her wrist. “I thought you’d enjoy picking something new.”
“Here?”
“Of course. Find something you love and it’s yours.”
She started to speak, but shook her head, still shocked. I’d known her most of my life. She’d lived on the palace grounds since she was a child and we’d played together for most of our childhood. I found, in all those years, she was more than willing to speak her mind on any topic she’d researched. From foreign policy to which Power Ranger would win in a fight, Blair always had an opinion.
To render her speechless, that was a new achievement for me.
At first, she barely hovered near the displays that had been pulled out to tempt her. But after some time, she started trying on some of the pieces, happily engaging with the employees. She had a way of putting people at ease, something I’d always admired.
“Seriously,” she skimmed a set of rings with her fingers, “how did you know I would love this?”
“When we were kids, you loved to try on whatever royal jewels I could smuggle out of the throne room.” I glanced over my shoulder at the cameras and cleared my throat. “I mean, we loved playing like we were doing that. All pretend, of course.”
“Of course,” Blair added quickly.
“I mean, we basically grew up together, didn’t we?”
Blair laughed to herself. “Or at least near each other”
“I’ve always enjoyed your company. I hope you know that.”
“Yes, Your Highness, I know.”
Blair remained guarded as we walked through the shop. “Please, it’s just us. Call me Leo.”
“It’s not just us, Your Highness. It’s us, and the entire kingdom behind the lenses of the cameras that never leave.”
“For me,” I clarified, “you’re the only one who matters right now, and I insist. Call me Leo, at least for this afternoon.”
“I’ll try, Your Highness.” She corrected herself. “Leo.”
It felt normal when she used my name. Like this was a real date. “You’re a lady of court now. It will become natural.”
Blair didn’t say anything, but I noticed her flinch at the mention of the title. I didn’t want to sour things, so I left it alone.
She stopped to admire an emerald necklace, pretty but understated. When I said she could have anything, I planned for extravagance. If it were Chantal, she would simply ask what the most expensive item was and take that, but Blair had always been more thoughtful.
“May I ask you something?”
“Anything.” I’d always loved how comfortable our relationship had been, no games, no pretenses, just conversation.
She ran her fingers over a sapphire pendant but left it without so much as picking it up. “Why did you choose me? Why am I here?”
Though her question caught me off guard, it shouldn’t have. It wasn’t that I didn’t expect her to ask, more that I doubted her nerve. But it was Blair, and if there was one trait she had in spades, it was the courage to speak.
“I suppose,” I slowed my step and she stayed close, pretending to look over the selections draped over velvet cloths for her inspection, “when considering my options, I tried to think of individuals whose company I enjoy, and you’ve always been one of those. We’ve discussed difficult topics and have always stayed civil, even when we didn’t agree. You are well versed in current affairs and carry a perspective I appreciate.” I looked away, feeling the color rising to my cheeks. “It helps that you’re incredibly beautiful without trying.” I cleared my throat. “I heard Michaela lent her talents for the ceremony last night and I have to admit, she only enhanced the beauty I’ve seen all along.”
I dared a glance in her direction, feeling every bit a silly schoolboy for admitting my attraction to her. But when our eyes met, at least I knew it wasn’t one-sided. If nothing else, her coy smile told me she appreciated what I’d said. For once, I hadn’t mucked it all up.
“I was surprised to say the least.” Blair started walking along the counter again, trailing her fingers over the gems. “Not only because of me, but all of us. You kept so many.”
Her words didn’t register. “So many?”
She glanced back over her shoulder, eyes round with innocence. “The common girls. Me, Sadie, Eirene. Michaela as well since she holds no station. None of us have a chance, but—”
My hand hooked around her elbow with enough pressure for her to stop. “What makes you think that?”
Blair’s smile spread, but weight anchored the edges, making it look forced. “Your Highness, we come from nothing. We can live this fantasy, but that’s all it is. A week or two of seeing how the rest live and then it’s back to reality.” She started walking again, but her words stunned me too much to follow.
“I made you a lady, didn’t I?” The spikes in my tone didn’t belong, but I’d taken a huge risk in doing it and I thought she would welcome my sacrifice.
“I have the title, yes, but what does it mean, Your Highness? You say that I am to have all the rights of a noblewoman, but how far does that extend? Am I the only noble in my family, or are they elevated by relation? My father is your driver. Shall you call him milord and ask him to fetch the car?” Her face pinned with stress. “I’ve said too much. You need not worry about my concerns.”
“Never once have I known you to hold your tongue, Blair, and I wouldn’t want you to start now.” I increased my pace and intercepted her. “When I made you a lady of court, I meant it. Each of you will receive a house. You’ll be given property that is yours . Just as I would for a man being made a lord. If it’s work you want, I’ll make it happen. If it’s leisure you’re seeking, then you’ll have it.”
“And if it’s equality, Your Highness? What then?” Her eyes met mine, ferocious and fiery with her unanswered questions. “Because I don’t want to elevate myself above others and look down. I know that pain and I wouldn’t wish it on anyone else. To be on the outside, looking in, living in a glass bowl where you can see everything, and yet never be a part.” Emotion glossed her eyes. “That’s a torture I wouldn’t wish on even my enemy.”
The voice in the back of my head screamed that I needed to remember the cameras, but the truth was, I didn’t care. Blair had borne her soul to me, and I couldn’t sweep it away to make it all pleasant again. If I was meant to rule, then I needed to understand.
“Tell me what you want. Explain what you think I should do.”
Her lips parted in surprise. Those were not the words of a king, asking the chauffeur’s daughter for advice on matter of policy. But maybe they needed to be.
“I want what most people want.”
“Riches?”
Her faint smile said I was an idiot before she ever spoke the words. “No, because when you’re handed wealth, it means nothing.” She inhaled slowly, ran her tongue over her lips and tried again. “We want an even playing field. We want a chance to build lives like the nobles have without being held down by circumstance. Just like the competition was, this game against us is rigged.”
I struggled to understand, my perspective limited. “You think we should dissolve the monarchy?”
She glanced over her shoulder, perhaps checking for the cameras. “No, actually I don’t. But there was a time in our history where the monarchy cared for their people and aided their success. Returning to that,” she set her hand over mine, “that would be a legacy I know you could be proud of… Leo.”
Blair moved around me, leaving me to consider her words. What did that mean? How could I help my people find success? I didn’t know where to start or how to…
“This one,” Blair stopped at a display near the end of the counter. “If it pleases you, I would like this one.”
I moved to look at her selection, frowning immediately. Of all the pieces she’d touched, it was by far the smallest and the least attractive. A simple platinum heart with an emerald suspended in the center, strung on a platinum chain.
“I’m afraid, you can’t have that one.”
“Why not?” The familiar fire I knew from our past raged to life. “You said I could pick anything—”
“So, I did, but I can only allow you to have that one if you also agree to take this one as well.” I nodded to the shop owner who waited for my command. He stepped forward and slipped another necklace around her elegant neck.
Her fingers found the ruby almost immediately. Three carats cut in a teardrop shape. It must have weighed heavily on her collarbone. She shifted and breathlessly stared in the tabletop mirror as the shop owner finished with the clasp. Delight warmed my heart as she tried to find the words, but again, Blair was speechless.
“How—how did you know that I would—”
“Duchess Augustine,” I answered. “You worked as her lady’s maid that summer between your semesters at university to make extra cash. I noticed that instead of exhibiting her extensive jewelry collection, she wore the same ruby pendant almost every night.” Blair’s eyes widened, and it confirmed what I had suspected. “When I asked her if it was her favorite, she said no, but her sweet lady’s maid had told her that diamonds were valuable, but too plain. Rubies were only for the most passionate people, those unafraid to stand out. People who embodied love and commitment.” I couldn’t help my smile as it slowly spread. “And I knew in that moment, rubies had to be your favorite.”
She faced the mirror again, fingertips caressing the deep scarlet stone that hung perfectly around her neck. “I—I—can’t—”
Before she could deny my gift, I slipped my arm around her waist and drew her closer. Lips dangerously close to her ear, I whispered, “Tell me again that you’re not a contender, Blair.” Her chest swelled with unspent breath. “Because I chose you for a reason.”
Her lips parted as our eyes locked. I could kiss her. Something held me back.
Doubt?
Regret?
Instead, I removed the mitten charm from my pocket. I held it in my palm, curious to hear her answer to a question I had to ask.
“Are you in this for me, Blair, or the crown?”