Present Day
“Theo and Ryan got suspended and missed out on the last game of the year. We lost, by the way.”
Jeremiah huffs. “Yeah, I heard…”
“And Germ…” I swallow hard. “Germ was a cruel fucking nickname that never should’ve happened. The taunts, the ridicule, everything you had to endure in your last year of high school… was because of me.”
My throat tightens. “There’s no excuse for it. You didn’t deserve any of that, and I’m so sorry for what I did to you.”
Jeremiah nods slowly, looking down briefly. “Yeah, I mean…” He scratches his brow. “I guess I’ve always wanted to know…why me?” He shakes his head. “I was a loner. I stayed to myself. No one knew who I was. I was basically invisible—”
“Stop it, Jer!” I clasp his wrist.
His mouth shuts slowly, brows pinched as he searches my face.
My eyes burn as I look away. “You were the farthest thing from invisible,” I take a big breath in and thankfully see Jeremiah patiently listening to me. “But, the only person who couldn’t see how fucking mesmerizing you were, was you.” I stress, tightening my grip.
His gaze drops to his lap.
With my heart in my throat, I admit the truth that I’ve been pushing down for eight years.
“Can of sprite.”
His gaze lifts once again to me. “What?”
“It wasn’t a coincidence that I knew your favorite drink.” I sit back. “Every day, after you finished your lunch, you’d grab a can of Sprite.”
Jeremiah looks away, eyes bouncing as though he’s trying to solve a math equation. “You saw that?”
I huff out a laugh. “You’re all I saw.” I sigh deeply. “I didn’t understand why then, but now, knowing what I know about myself, it’s clear as day. I was so fucking into you.”
His face gives nothing away. Just that familiar calmness.
I shift, sitting up straighter, needing him to see me.
Really see me. “You were… unbearably attractive, and one of the smartest kids in our whole grade, and completely unattainable. I wanted so badly for you to just notice me and when you didn’t…
” I wince. The memory of it all claws at my chest. “Jere, I was such an idiot.”
Slowly, his hand slides into mine, giving me a soft but firm squeeze.
“Why… why didn’t you just talk to me?” he asks softly.
My eyebrows raise as I blow out a big breath of air. Fuck, where do I even begin?
“That’s… a little complicated.” I scratch the back of my neck. “I guess I didn’t really feel like I could?”
Jeremiah’s brows furrow as he slowly shakes his head.
Swallowing hard, I continue. “Well, I guess… my home life…” I inhale deeply. “To put it lightly—”
“You don’t have to put it lightly,” he cuts in. His hand rises to the back of my neck, cupping it gently. I suck in a breath, immediately feeling some of the tension leave me.
“From what I know, my parents were young. Too young.” I stare down at my hands. “I think they loved me. At least…I remember feeling loved, and I think that matters.” I shrug weakly. “They just couldn’t give me the life I needed.” I wet my lips, taking a second.
“When I was six, social services stepped in. Turns out things weren’t as okay as I thought they were.” I let out a shaky breath. “Then I bounced around foster homes for a while.”
My fingers start picking at a loose thread on my joggers. “I hated that part. Every time I started feeling safe somewhere, it was like—boom—I had to start over again. New house. New people. New school. New everything.”
Jeremiah’s thumb brushes lightly against my neck, grounding me.
“Then high school happened and I met Ryan.” I smile faintly.
“He dragged me home one day and for some reason his parents really liked me. I think they figured I was a good influence on him or something, so they worked with social services to keep me.” I huff out a quiet laugh.
“I got really lucky.” I sigh, threading my fingers through my hair.
“I know Ryan’s…Ryan, but he’s the brother I never had.
His little sister, too. They’re…family to me.
” I swallow. “I finally felt like I belonged somewhere.”
My smile fades. Tearing the loose thread off my joggers, I start rolling it into a ball between my fingers.
“But his mom and step-dad were strict. Lots of rules. Lots of expectations. Not just for them, but for me too. And while they could act out, I felt like I couldn’t.” I clear my throat. “And when I started becoming... curious about things. About guys.”
Jeremiah’s expression softens immediately. “Oh...”
I shake my head. “I was terrified.” My voice cracks.
“Because all I could think was, what if they find out? What if I lose this too?” I suck in a shaky breath.
“So I shoved it all down. And the more I shoved it down, the angrier I got.” I finally look up at him.
“Because I wanted something I felt like I couldn't have.” My chest tightens as I look at his beautiful face. “I wanted you so badly.”
Jeremiah puffs out a breath. “Chase...”
“I wanted to talk to you. I wanted to get to know you. Back then, that night in your pool, I wanted to—” I squeeze my eyes shut. “But instead, I hurt you.” My voice cracks harder now. “What I called you… what I did… It was awful. You didn’t deserve any of it.”
“Chase, breathe.” Jeremiah pulls me into his arms, surrounding me completely. “Just breathe.”
I melt against him as his hand rubs slow circles across my back.
I nod my head on his shoulder. It’s no excuse for what I did. I know that. But, it’s nice he at least knows what was happening. Something I’ve never shared with anyone.
He slowly lets me go and I wait, heart pounding, for whatever comes next.
“You didn’t have the freedom to figure yourself out,” he says quietly, reaching for my hand.
“At that age, that had to be really confusing.” Jeremiah traces his thumb across my knuckles.
“And, um… listen,” He sucks in a long breath, brows pinched.
“As much as I played it off like I didn’t care what people thought of me…
I did. I do.” He sighs. “I wish you would’ve talked to me…
not because of the bullying. Yeah, that part sucked,” he chuckles lightly.
“But… more because I would’ve liked to know you too. I found you… surprising.”
I blink, holding my breath.
Gently pushing a piece of my hair off my forehead, he sighs.
“I understand why you were scared. It doesn't make what happened okay... but I don't think I've been angry at you for a while now.” He slips his arm behind my shoulders, pulling me into a side hug. “I’m happy we’re here. Like this. Right now.”
Relief rushes through me. Before I know it, I’m straddling him, arms wrapped around his neck.
I press my face into his neck, my arms tightening around him.
“Hey. You okay?” he asks, voice low as his hands continue rubbing soothing circles along my back.
“Yeah, I just… I really like you,” I mutter into his shoulder.
“I really like you too,” he says so gently. Like it’s the easiest thing in the world. Which shocks me to hear because I know he’s not one for too many words. Hopefully now, with this out in the air, he can continue letting himself be honest with me.
I try not to think about that right now and just let the words settle.
“Some people say I latch on to others,” I admit. My mind replaying what Heather had said in her office not long ago.
“Doesn’t sound like an issue to me. Latch away.”
“You sure about that?” I sit up slightly, looking down at his face. He’s watching me like I’m something sacred.
His eyebrows scrunch together. “Yeah, I’m sure. I know you’re worth hanging onto.”
I look away, lips twitching into something I can’t quite control.
I turn back to him, poking him lightly in the chest. “Oh, you’re good.”
“What do you mean?”
“This whole vulnerable, emotional bit? Too good. I really am falling for it,” I tease.
But he doesn’t laugh. He just holds on tighter, eyes searching mine like they’re memorizing something important.
“Come here,” he murmurs, pulling me in.
Our lips meet in the softest, surest kiss I’ve ever had.