Chapter Twenty-Nine
LEXI
Hazel had already left for her classes the next morning, and I took my time getting up and showering. The night before, she was the best friend who made sure I didn’t feel a thing, loading me up on wine and junk food.
I had poured a bowl of Frosted Flakes when there was a knock on the door. My eyebrows scrunched together. Who in the world? We rarely had visitors, and normally if we did, it was for Hazel, and she was usually home.
I opened the door and my eyes widened when both Mom and Mr. Daniel were standing outside the door.
“Um, what are you doing here?” What was she playing at? She never came and visited me on campus. She pretty much ignored that I existed unless she wanted something, so her being here, with Kayden’s dad, was NOT on my to do list for the day.
I stood frozen in the doorway, not knowing what to do. I didn’t exactly want to let them in, but I had a feeling there was no choice in the matter.
“Are you going to let us in?” Her eyes narrowed to slits, a scathing glare coming on her face. Mom was beautiful, but when she was angry, she looked like Yzma from Emerperor’s New Groove. Yikes.
Dad had figured her quirks out early on in their relationship, and he even told me one time that if she was mad, it’d be best to either be outside playing or on the other side of the house. No one ever crossed her when she was pissed, and currently she was setting her anger on me.
I moved aside, letting them come into the kitchen/living area. Mr. Daniel made himself comfortable on the couch, turning the television to football. Guess he wants no part in this conversation. I wouldn’t either.
"We need to talk," Mom said, pulling out a stool, placing her purse on the island and making herself situated.
No thanks.
"Do we?" I closed the door behind them and stood by the sink, crossing my arms over my chest. "Because from where I'm standing, we’ve done enough talking."
"Don't be dramatic, Alexis." She rolled her eyes, trying to play it off. “You humiliated me. You need to apologize."
You need to apologize. Not, are you okay? I’m worried about you. No, she wants me to apologize.
“Are you fucking kidding me?”
"You made a scene, and rolled up your sleeves at the dinner table like some kind of... " She stopped herself, glancing at Mr. Daniel like she needed his agreement to finish the sentence. He didn't give it to her, just continued to watch TV with his jaw tight. Well, that’s interesting.
"Like some kind of what, Mom?" My voice came out steadier than I expected, considering I was ready to rip her fucking head off. "Say it. Finish the sentence you were about to say."
"That's not important."
"Why not? You’re the one who came forty minutes out of your way, looking for an apology you know you aren’t going to get. You don't get to rewrite that into me being dramatic."
Something flickered in her eyes, as if I was crossing a dangerous boundary. "I was upset. We both said things."
“I said things because you pushed me to the point of no choice. I know you’re grieving Mom, but so am I. I am also the only one who survived a horrific crash. Think about that for a second. What would that do to you if you were in my situation?”
My hands shook, but I put them behind my back, where she couldn’t see what she was doing to me.
“You’ve been writing me off since. I know I’m not Jake and I’m sure as hell not Dad, but treating your only daughter as if she’s a bug on the bottom of your shoe isn’t the way to go about it.
From what you saw on my arms, it’s obvious I’ve been hurting for a while. Even longer than the crash...”
I let my voice drift off, trying to give her a hint. That this pain had been going on longer than she ever could’ve imagined. That I’ve been alone, suffering through it because that’s how she left me.
Trashed.
Scared.
Broken.
Alone.
Always fucking alone.
"Alexis..." She began, but I cut her off. Maybe one day she would listen to me, and I her. But I refused to give in, because if I did, we’d end up in the same shitty circle we always did.
"No. I'm not going to apologize for surviving something you clearly wish I hadn't."
The room went silent. Even Mr. Daniel, who was still watching football, seemed to have stopped breathing.
Her face paled, and part of me, the rational part, felt bad about saying that. But the other part, the one that didn’t give a fuck anymore, didn’t care. She needed the truth, point blank. She needed someone to be blunt with her, not catering to her every need. "I...I never wished for that. Never.”
Actions speak louder than words.
“While you may not have said it, it’s clear in the way you’ve been acting. Not talking to me. Selling the house. Trying to merge two families together that clearly don’t need to be. You don’t do something like that if you aren’t trying to erase what you already had.”
She didn't answer. For the first time in years, this was the first time she didn’t have something to say.
A rebuttal.
An excuse.
A lie.
Tears gathered in her eyes, and my fingers itched to hug her. Because even though I was pissed at her, I did love her. Always. I wanted her to love me back. For once to put me first.
“I think we should go,” Mr. Daniel said as he stood up, helping Mom out of her chair. The sad thing was, he may have been good for her. I could see that he cared. I wasn’t sure how much, but it was there. The thing about it though, they weren’t supposed to be together.
Really though, does it even matter? Kayden and I obviously weren’t going to happen. Maybe it was time to let them be and leave well enough alone.
Even if they did stay together, that didn’t mean I could be around them like a big happy family. No, if they stayed together, they could build their own family. One where I wouldn’t be included.
“I think that’s a good idea,” I mirrored, ready for them to be on their way. I needed to be alone, away from everyone.
She nodded, letting him help her up. She grabbed her purse and leaned into him, her eyes blinking back tears. “I’m sorry, honey. For everything.”
They left, closing the door behind them. The silence was suffocating, and as I collapsed against the counter, I let the tears fall.
Wishing for things to go back to the way they were. When Dad was here.
Kayden
I was lacing up my skates when I noticed Dad making his way over to the benches.
"We need to talk," his deep voice was almost a growl. Jeez, who crapped in his Cheerios.
"Kind of in the middle of practice, Dad."
"This can't wait." He glanced around the mostly empty rink, a few stragglers from the early session still clearing out, and lowered his voice slightly. "Nora wanted to confront Alexis after the whole dinner fiasco, and I thought I’d stop by while we were here.”
Yikes. That’s a disaster if I’d ever seen one.
My eyebrows rose, “I’m sure that went well.” Not. Lexi probably bit their heads off.
He sighed, “Not really.”
I let my skates be, setting my elbow on my knee. “What happened?”
"Nora went in there demanding an apology. I’m sure you can guess what happened next.”
Oh, I can only guess that shit hit the fan.
"Kayden." His voice dropped, "I need to ask you something, and I need you to be honest with me. You’ve been around that family more than I have. Is she normally like that? With Alexis?”
I leaned back against the bench, weighing my thoughts. “She reminds me of Mom. Abandons people when things get tough, treats people like shit. The fact that you’re wanting to get back into a relationship with that kind of tension is beyond me.”
His face paled as if he were about to puke, “Why didn’t you say something sooner?”
I scoffed, “We did. Hell, we both did. Neither one of you listened, too caught up with your own crap to realize your children were in pain. It’s not a good idea, Dad. Never has been.”
He didn’t say anything. My gaze narrowed, and as I looked at him, and I mean really looked at him, I noticed something was changing.
He didn’t seem to be the hardened man I grew up with.
It was like he was growing right along with me, and seeing that, kind of freaked me out.
He was supposed to be the one with the answers, not me.
“I’m going to take Nora back to the house; it seems there are some things we need to talk about.”
I nodded as he stood up, not saying another word. Dad coming to me for advice was by far the weirdest thing I’d ever witnessed. He was getting ready to leave when he looked back at me.
“I know I’ve always been hard on you, and I’m sorry for that. You have an undeniable talent, Kayden. One that any team in the NHL would be lucky to have. I may not say it often, but I’m proud of you. Keep it up.”
He left after that, and I sat there watching him walk away.
What the hell happened?