7
7
New Year’s Eve, three months ago
Our music’s loud, spilling through the open glass doors of my LA apartment and into the city in the distance. Fireworks have been going off against the inky clouds all night, but inside my apartment a different type of fireworks sizzle through me. John and I escaped to my room a half hour ago, and the energy’s hot between us, just like it has been for weeks since he practically moved in. He hardly ever went to his place anymore, only to check the mail. We can’t keep our hands, our mouths, our everything, off one another.
“Fuck, baby, you’re so good at that. Keep going—Princess, no, don’t stop baby, I—” he mutters as I take him into my mouth, deep in my throat. The way his body reacts to me, his fingers clawing at my hair, gives me even more confidence.
“I wanna have some fun too,” I purr, crawling up his body and trailing my hands over his hard abs. I straddle his thighs, leaning forward to kiss him flush on the mouth, my body going crazy for him as he moves his hands over my hips and slips them into my lace panties.
“Always so wet for me,” he rumbles in appreciation, gliding over me. “God, I fucking love you, baby.”
“I love you too,” I say, tipping my head back as he slides his fingers in an addicting rhythm. It feels so fucking good, like no one else has ever made me feel. “John . . . oh my—”
The moment’s interrupted by a loud crash behind us: my bedroom door banging against the wall. Music and voices from outside suddenly sound clearer as a drunken body falls into my room. The party must have gotten sloppy since John and I ran off to my bedroom.
“Holy shit,” John barks, his startled noise making me laugh like crazy even though I should be scrambling to cover myself. He pushes me gently off and wraps the sheets around us, eyes wide to see who the hell just walked—no, tumbled—in.
“Val.” I laugh harder when I recognize her coral-pink dress. She’s sprawled on the floor in the doorway to my room, one of her sparkly silver heels snapped right off. “What happened?”
She slurs some words I don’t understand and moves to drag herself up, but when she falls back down and makes a weird sputtering noise, my laughter dies instantly. This isn’t funny anymore.
“Oh shit. John, she’s not okay.” A chill rushes through me as I realize this isn’t just another drunken episode; Val’s on something. I’ve seen her drunk at least a hundred times but this is different. “Help me.”
We snatch our clothes up fast from where they’re scattered around us in the bed and pull them on, jumping out and across the room to lift Val up from where she collapsed.
“Prin . . . Princess . . . sssstop. Stop,” she stutters as we pull her upright and lean her back against the open door.
“What did you take, Val?” I ask, brushing her long brown hair out of her face. “What was it this time?”
She mumbles another incoherent sentence, and I glance helplessly at John.
“She’s really out of it,” he says, shaking his head.
“What are we gonna do?” I look into my apartment, where the party is still going strong. I doubt anyone else knows she’s in this state, and for her sake, I don’t want them to. I can hear people down the hallway laughing together, carrying on with their night, not realizing one of my best friends is in trouble.
“I don’t want anyone to see her like this, she’ll be mortified,” I tell him, my voice cracking.
When I was getting ready with the girls earlier tonight, Riley was all over Val, helping her with her makeup, hugging her, desperate to get her alone. Riley was always willing to go further than we were—walking the edge. And Val struggled with saying no, always tempted to take the fun a bit further.
Regardless, rule of thumb: I don’t gossip about or judge my friends, period.
“We need to get her into a bed and try to get her to drink some water. Keep her head up,” John says with concern.
“Val, how’d you end up like this? Please stay with me.”
Her eyes roll back in her head and I remember the girl I know and love. The one who’s always had my back, the one who has demons to fight but a heart of gold.
Valerie has been cursed with one hell of a family. It’s understandable why she’d want an escape from all of her trauma and responsibility. From drug use to violence and too much disposable money, there’s always a fire for Val to put out, and I wish I could take all of that away for her, but I can’t. All I can do is be here for her and try to help her get it together, once she’s sober.
“Val? Oh shit. Is she okay?” Tripp says from down the hallway. He’s my closest guy friend, and I’ve known him ever since I came to LA at seventeen. Concern is etched deep in his forehead. His curly black hair bounces as he moves, and when he reaches us, he drops to his knees in front of her.
“Something is really wrong, Tripp,” I tell him. “Did you see what she took?”
“No,” he answers. “Everything was fine until she started getting really heavy real quick. I was trying to sit her down on the couch, make sure she was okay. I only left for a second to get her some water, and when I came back she was gone.”
“I’m fine,” Val says clearly, though it seems to take some effort. Her lips work overtime to pronounce the words. “Riley’s a fucking . . . fuck. Rye, Rye . . . Rye.”
“Where’s Riley?” I ask. “Maybe she can tell us what Val took.”
“She bailed an hour ago, said she was hitting another party. Said something about needing to go where she’d be seen,” Tripp said.
Val’s shoulders heave as she leans over and vomits all over the floor. It’s nearly all liquid, meaning she hasn’t eaten in god knows how long. I also feel sick, not because she’s thrown up, but because of how worried I am for my friend.
“What?” I frown at Val. “What about Riley?”
I can’t believe Riley would get Val this out of it and then leave her to head to some other party hoping there’ll be paparazzi to document her amazing New Year’s Eve. I know I promised not to judge my friends but this was a bit beyond.
“Let me sleep,” Val groans, obviously confused.
“She’ll be okay, she just needs to hydrate and rest,” Tripp says. “I’ll stay with her. I promise I won’t leave her side.”
He pulls the strap of her dress back onto her shoulder, righting her neckline to cover her up a little better. It’s a sweet move, and my belly aches at the thought of any guy acting so tender in such a vulnerable moment. It’s not enough for him, so he pulls his hoodie over his head and puts it on her.
“Yeah, I think you’re right,” I say with a sigh. “I can’t believe she got to this point. Oh, Val.” I stroke her hair as she snuggles up against me.
“Tired.” She sulks into my shoulder. “Please let me sleep.”
Together, we help Val into my guest room, where I tuck her into bed and leave Tripp to watch over her. He insists he has it under control and that I get back to celebrating. John and I head back to my room, just as the staff finishes cleaning up after Val, both of us pulled out of our celebratory mood, worried about Val.
“She’s going to be okay. Let’s find a way to get her some help when the sun comes up. There’s nothing you can do right now. I know it’s scary, but you need to sleep, babe. The problem will still be here when you wake up.” John comforts me, wrapping his arms around my body as I cuddle up close to his.
“I’m sorry,” I say, though I don’t know why. I’m mostly just sorry that Val’s not going to remember the start of a new year. I don’t know how to help her. I’m still shocked from seeing her like that.
John says nothing for a while, both of us just lying there in bed together staring out at the glittering stretch of Los Angeles through my floor-to-ceiling windows.
“I feel so lucky to be with you.” I sigh.
“Lucky eleven,” John says.
“What do you mean?”
He lifts his phone to show me the time. It’s 11:11 p.m. “Make a wish, baby,” he whispers into my hair.
“I wish to be like this, with you, forever,” I say easily, tracing a pattern over his chest. “I wish for Val to stop being haunted by the demons that she’s trying to erase. I hope she and Tripp end up together. I just want her to be happy—”
“It’s a one-minute thing, P.,” John jokes, trying to lighten my mood. “I think you ran out of wishes already.”
“Doesn’t matter,” I say with a little laugh. “I had to say it all.”
“You really want to be with me forever?” he checks.
I nod against his chest. “Absolutely.”
John kisses my head and sighs, but he doesn’t say anything else. He doesn’t need to. It’s just so easy between us in these quiet moments alone. Easy and peaceful and all I’ve ever wanted.