Chapter 27
”‘But what should I do?’ the baby giraffe asked her mom.”
Delilah looked up from the book she was holding. None of the children were paying attention—their eyes were glued to the parking lot beyond the window.
Delilah closed her book. ”Okay everybody, what”s going on?”
”I”m just making sure your car is okay,” Evan said.
Sara added, ”Then we can call the police even earlier and maybe catch him next time.”
Delilah smiled at them. ”That is so sweet of you guys, but we don”t have to worry about it. It was just a one-time thing, and my car is going to be just fine.”
A one-time thing. That”s all any of it had been. The break-in at her house, the knife getting stolen, and that single glorious night with Ben.
He hadn”t called her since she’d left. Two days, and no contact. She told herself she didn”t miss him. She had even gone grocery shopping so she could start fixing her own breakfasts—she realized she had a better milk supply for McKenzie when she was eating enough herself. Logically it made sense, but she had never put the pieces together before. And ever since Delilah had been getting regular meals, McKenzie seemed a lot happier and less fussy. She had even fallen into a regular schedule, napping between two and three-thirty in the afternoons. Right now, for example, while Delilah read to the other children, McKenzie was in the nap room, snoozing away. It made her seem older to Delilah for some reason.
The kids were looking at her, waiting for her to continue the story. Pleased that they no longer seemed anxious about a criminal breaking into her car, Delilah opened the book again and continued reading.
The rest of the afternoon passed in much the same way, Delilah going about her business and then randomly thinking of Ben and then having to push those thoughts away so she could do her job. It wasn”t fair. She was darn sure he wasn’t thinking about her as much as she was thinking about him. She was tempted to call or text him just to remind him that she existed, but the thought of doing even that much made her heart ache.
”No, I don”t miss him. I don”t.”
”Sorry, what was that?” a man said.
Delilah looked up quickly from where she’d been helping Sara tie her shoe. Sara”s fathers were here to pick her up. The bald one with the beard was giving her a curious look.
”Sorry, just spacing out and talking to myself,” Delilah said.
”Jeremy does that too, sometimes,” the man said. He nudged his partner, who pretended to be offended. Delilah knew he couldn”t have been offended, because the bald man”s voice had been laden with affection.
Delilah watched as they walked across the parking lot, Sara between them, each of them holding one of her hands. A perfect little family. Would she ever find something like that for McKenzie? For her? There was no denying the growing ache that filled Delilah”s chest when she thought about raising McKenzie alone. She could do it, and she would be happy. But a part of her would always wonder, what if...
* * *
By Thursday,Delilah didn”t feel any better. It didn”t help that Thursday had been one of her worst workdays to date. As she and McKenzie pulled up in front of her house, Delilah looked down at her borrowed shirt. Today, two kids had thrown up—Bailey, the one-year-old, and Evan. Their parents had had to come pick them up, and Delilah had needed to change her shirt. As she grabbed McKenzie from the back seat, Delilah remembered Ben”s nickname for Tykes Palace—Typhoid Palace. Delilah just hoped she didn”t catch whatever they had this time.
She brought McKenzie inside and played with her for a few minutes before carrying her into the kitchen so Delilah could make herself a grilled cheese sandwich. The grilled cheese certainly wasn”t on par with Ben”s cooking, but at least she was eating. After her dinner, she read McKenzie some library books and then nursed her and put her to bed.
The travel crib seemed really tiny in McKenzie’s room, and Delilah missed the real one with the fine, polished wood. It had been a few days, and she wondered why Ben hadn”t brought it over yet. Maybe he was just busy. Or maybe, without them there, he had no reason to go into Chase’s old room and he wouldn”t even notice the crib. Maybe he”d forgotten all about them. It was entirely possible.
She glanced over at the garbage bags stacked up next to the scum chair. She should really unpack their things—all week she had just been rummaging through the bags for whatever clothes she wanted for her and McKenzie. But they each had their own dressers, and she should put things away.
She looked around the house again. She’d been surprised when she came back on Saturday to see that it wasn”t a complete wreck. Not everything was in order, but somebody had gone through and tidied. Had that been Ben? It seemed like the kind of thoughtful thing he would do. She wondered if he had marked off the day in his calendar and called it a good deed. Suddenly, her eyes filled with tears. Maybe that”s all she and McKenzie had been to him—a good deed.
No, she wasn”t gonna think like that. Maybe they had only shared one night together, and one night was all it would ever be, but if nothing else, they had become friends. Friendship had to count for something, and she would focus on that.
As a friend, then, shouldn”t she be able to call him up to say hello? Maybe she should. She picked up her phone and scrolled through her contacts list, looking for his phone number.
Her finger hovered over the screen. Nervous loops started moving in her stomach. What would he say? What would she say? She couldn”t do it.
Instead, she found Viviana”s name and placed a call.
”Hey, Delilah, what”s up?” Viviana asked.
”Nothing much, just wanted to say hi.”
”Aw, good to hear from you! I miss your face. You should have Ben watch McKenzie tonight and come out with me and Brigitte.”
Was it possible Viviana didn”t know she had moved out? ”Well, actually, I don”t know that Ben would want to drive all the way over to Maxon to watch McKenzie.”
”Wait, you moved out?”
”Yeah.” Delilah took in a deep breath, held it, then let it go. She could talk about this without getting too emotional. ”We just figured since the trouble was gone, we could each go back to our regular lives again.”
”Well, that explains why he”s being a grumpier douche than usual,” Viviana said.
”A what?” Delilah laughed.
”I”ve only run into him a couple times this week, but both times he acted like a grumpy asshole.”
”Well, I haven”t talked to him,” Delilah said.
Viviana made hmm sound. ”Maybe that”s the problem.”
”What do you mean?” Delilah asked. A small tendril of hope sprouted somewhere in her middle.
”I mean, I think he misses you guys.”
“I bet it doesn’t outweigh the joy of getting a full night’s sleep,” Delilah said.
“Oh, honey.” Viviana made a sympathetic sound. “Do you want me to watch McKenzie and you can go out tonight?”
Delilah forced herself to smile so that Viviana would hear it in her voice. “No, I’m all right, really. McKenzie has been sleeping better and you should’ve seen her today at Tykes Palace, trying to roll over.”
She and Viviana chatted for a few more minutes, and when it was time to hang up, Delilah did feel better.
She felt better…but not great.