Chapter 24
CHAPTER
TWENTY-FOUR
ISLA
The discharge paperwork took longer than I thought it would, or maybe it just felt that way in the wake of the unexpected. I placed the envelope in my back pocket, folding it small, trying to avoid it. Silently hoping they were too.
It almost felt as if I was holding a treasure.
The nurse stood at the end of the bed, flipping through the pages of what they wanted me to sign off on. I should’ve been paying attention to what she was saying, but I didn’t hear one word. I was too consumed by what the hell just happened.
It was one thing after another, and I honestly had whiplash, holding on as hard as I could on this roller-coaster ride we found ourselves in.
“Low stress,” she repeated. “That’s the most important thing for you to remember.”
My attention kept drifting back to the same place every time I tried to listen to her.
Them.
Us.
Julius stood near the window, arms crossed over his broad chest, his posture rigid, holding himself together by force alone. His eyes weren’t on the nurse, and they weren’t on Kraven or me either. There were somewhere else entirely.
He was somewhere else entirely, filling the space with his presence anyway. They hadn’t spoken, or at least I hadn’t heard him. I knew they talked, though. It was obvious in their demeanor. How they were standing on opposite ends of the room, with me once again in the middle.
How can I choose?
I swallowed hard, forcing my attention back to the nurse as she slid another paper toward me.
“Initial here.”
I did.
“Sign at the bottom.”
I did.
“Alright,” she remarked with a small smile. “You’re cleared to go. Just take it easy. Again, no unnecessary stress, okay?”
Her words echoed through my mind.
“Can you stand?” she asked.
Before I could move, Kraven stepped forward.
“Easy,” he ordered, reaching for me.
His arm came around my back. It was warm and steady and extremely comforting. Across the room, Julius moved as well. I didn’t have to look at him because I felt him.
By the time my feet touched the ground, he was already beside me too. Now I had one on each side.
“Careful,” Julius said, grabbing my hand.
And just like that, I was anchored on both sides with neither of them looking at one another.
What did they discuss?
It was beyond obvious that it was wreaking havoc on their minds, and it made my chest tighten.
The nurse didn’t comment on anything. If she noticed our dynamic, she pretended not to.
I couldn’t read her one way or the other, trying to hold on to something that was real other than the rush of emotions we were all experiencing.
“I’ll get a wheelchair,” Julius volunteered.
“I don’t need one.”
Julius’s hand gripped a little harder while Kraven stated, “She can walk.”
The hallway blurred a bit. Julius stayed close to me, his hand never leaving mine. Kraven matched my pace on the other side. However, no one spoke, which was unusual. They were trying not to cause me stress, but it was having the exact opposite effect.
Once we got out of the building, Kraven said, “Wait here.”
I watched him leave, my fingers tightening slightly in Julius’s grip without thinking.
“You okay?” he asked.
“Yeah.” I nodded.
I wasn’t okay—far from it. His eyes searched mine, not believing me, and I couldn’t blame him. He could always read me like the back of his hand. Both of them could. I thought I was better at hiding my feelings, but they were proving that I wasn’t good at it at all.
A car pulled up a few minutes later. Kraven stepped out, moving toward us without hesitation. Julius didn’t let go of my hand until the last second, and even then, it felt reluctant.
Kraven opened the passenger door, helping me as Julius slid in the back seat. It was odd that Julius wasn’t driving his car and decided to sit in the back instead.
The drive back to the house was quiet. It wasn’t awkward, but it wasn’t entirely peaceful either. It was just extremely heavy and thick, making it difficult to see past what was currently happening and where we went from there.
I leaned my head back against the seat. The exhaustion crept in deeper now that everything had slowed down, and we were driving to the house. A home that felt like it might be hell. With my eyes closed, I was still aware of them.
Kraven was steady at the wheel, his eyes facing forward. Lost in thought. Then all of a sudden, Kraven’s hand reached for mine, and I let him. I could feel Julius’s eyes on our hands, contemplating something I couldn’t pinpoint in the least.
By the time we pulled into the driveway, it was after noon. Everything still looked the same, but it felt much different. Kraven was out of the car first, and Julius opened my door before he could.
As soon as I was sitting on the couch, Kraven grabbed a blanket, draping it over my lap. I didn’t sleep much at the hospital, since I hated that place.
This time, I didn’t argue when they told me I needed to rest. From then on, Kraven did what he’d been doing for me this past month. He brought me water, some food, and my prenatals. It wasn’t on purpose. It was instinctive for him, trying to maintain some normalcy and consistency amid the disaster.
Julius watched his every move, standing in the corner of the room. This wasn’t about me anymore. He wasn’t experiencing sadness over what had happened; he was going through the motions of what occurred while he wasn’t there.
Waiting for I don’t know what.
“Julius—”
“I’ll be back.” He interrupted me, going right out the front door.
My heart was in my throat as I heard the car pull out.
“What was that?” I asked Kraven, fully aware that he would know.
He didn’t answer right away, his gaze fixated on the door that Julius just exited.
“He just needs space.”
My heart dropped. “From me?”
“From everything.”
His reply didn’t make me feel better. “Where did he go?”
He studied me for a second, searching for answers he wasn’t asking. “I’m not sure.”
Time moved more slowly after Julius was gone. I couldn’t help but notice how much Kraven watched me without making it obvious. I should have been used to the way he stayed close to me, the way he was taking care of me, but I wasn’t.
Especially after Julius saw it for the first time.
“Try to rest,” Kraven suggested.
“I’m not tired.”
“You are.”
I exhaled because he wasn’t wrong. “Kraven…”
He stilled for a second before he responded, “Yeah?”
I wavered. “He’s not okay.”
His gaze flicked to the door again. “I know.”
Kraven stayed close to me, but not in an overbearing kind of way. He moved through the house like he always did, as if nothing had changed when everything had.
I watched the way he refilled my water before I even asked.
I watched the way he adjusted my blanket again.
I watched the way his eyes tracked me, following me wherever I went.
I watched the way he cooked for me.
The way he smiled at me.
The way, the way, the way…
Knowing Julius watched it too.
“How long has this been like this?” I questioned before I could stop myself.
“Like what?”
“This.” I gestured back and forth between us. “You… knowing what I need before I say it. You being here with me like you’re meant to be. You and me, these feelings… this love… how long has it been this way between us?”
He didn’t say a word, just watched me.
“He noticed it,” I confirmed.
“Yeah,” was all he retorted.
“And he left.”
“He needed to.”
Silence settled again. We didn’t try to fill it in, explain it, or even justify it. We just lived in it as we waited for Julius to return.
And somehow, it made it worse.
Hours passed, or maybe it just felt that way. I couldn’t tell. Kraven had convinced me to lie down at some point. The next thing I knew, I was lying in his arms. We hadn’t moved from the couch and must have passed out.
I wasn’t fully asleep when the front door opened. I heard his footsteps. They were slower than before and less controlled too. My eyes fluttered open, and that was when I saw Julius staring right at us.
Except I was still in his brother’s arms. Though that wasn’t the truth, since they weren’t real brothers anymore, and by the expression on Julius’s face…
He felt that truth just as much as I did.