13. Cassidy
Chapter 13
Cassidy
H mm. Maybe TLC’s No Scrubs . That seems fitting. I really don’t want no scrubs.
“This one,” a familiar voice says from behind me. He cages me in against the jukebox with an arm on side while he points to a song.
It’s Quit Playing Games by The Backstreet Boys .
I shake my head. “Nah. I’m thinking something like…” I point to ABCDEFU by Gayle .
He points to REO Speedwagon’s Can’t Fight This Feeling.
I shake my head again. He leans in more. His scruff brushes against my face. And I’m engulfed in his warmth. He selects You Belong with Me by Taylor Swift .
I look at him and he smirks. “How was your first kiss, Princess?”
I roll my eyes and push him away. “Wouldn’t you like to know.”
I side step him and he pulls me back to him. “I really would. Was it everything you had hoped it would be?”
I shoot daggers at him. He’s playing with me. This entire time, he’s been playing with me.
“Is this another one of your stupid lessons?”
He cocks his head. “Do you want it to be?”
My eyes trail to his lips. The lips I’ve wanted to kiss all night.
“Only if it doesn’t mean anything.”
I stare up at him. He considers it for a moment. Then takes my hand and pulls me along with him. “Come on.”
“Where are you taking me?”
“Outside. Away from–” he motions to the guy I kissed. He’s with his friends and sends me a wink. I feel a little sick. Especially when one of his friends slaps him on the back like he’s congratulating him for something.
Joshua watches my reaction.
“I know his type.”
I look at him. “Because you are his type?”
A muscle in his jaw clenches and he continues to pull me outside.
Once we’re in the fresh air, he turns me to him, takes me by the hips and sets me on the balcony.
I hold onto his shoulders so I don’t fall off the side. The ocean is close. I can hear it lapping against the shore. But it’s quiet out here.
He puts a hand on either one of my thighs and spreads them apart. I swallow down my nerves.
What is he doing?
He steps into the space between them. Pressing his body close to me. His muscles are hard. All of them. And I feel a rush of excitement pool between my legs.
Or maybe that’s the alcohol.
He reaches for my chin and tips it up to him. “Do you want me to show you what your first kiss should’ve felt like?”
He stares down at my eyes. Dark blue against my hazel.
“It won’t mean anything,” he says, leaning in.
“It’s just research,” I tell him.
He gives one terse nod and before we can change our minds, our lips meet. The moment they do, something in me snaps.
It’s light. Soft. Like I’m something fragile that can break if he pushes too hard. He gives me a small peck before he steps away from me.
I’m breathless, trying to hold onto the railing so I don’t faint and fall over the other side.
He looks angry. Like he’s mad at himself. He places both hands on his hips and stares at me.
We can’t leave it at that. That can’t be all he gives me.
I jump off the railing and walk over to him. “What the hell was that?”
He shakes his head. “A kiss. That’s what you wanted.”
Libby’s words from earlier pop into my head. You’re in control here.
“No it’s not,” I say. His eyes meet mine and I shove him.
“What the hell, Cassidy?”
“Kiss me, like you mean it, Joshua. Kiss me like you would’ve when that guy was watching.”
His jaw ticks. And he moves to me. Grabbing my hips and lifting me to him. I wrap my legs around his waist and he backs me up to the side of the building, claiming my mouth and making it his.
He tastes me like I’m something he’s wanted all of his life. His tongue splits my lips open and I welcome it. He pushes in, drinking me in. And I try not to rock against his body pressed against me. Failing miserably.
All I want is to feel him closer. Pushing further. Erasing the feeling of the nameless dude who claimed my first kiss.
His hand slips behind my neck and holds me even closer. Moving his lips over mine, tugging my bottom lip into his mouth. We don’t breathe, except for each other. His hand slides up my back and my skin sets on fire from his touch. Neither one of us wants to break this up.
Unfortunately, we don’t have to.
“Uh… sorry to interrupt.”
In a flash, Joshua sets me down on my feet and moves away from me, reaching for the back of his neck like a kid caught doing something bad.
Fergie steps out. “Keelan just threw up on the bar. He’s getting kicked out.”
“Fuck,” Joshua sighs out, glancing over at me.
“We should go,” I say through a gulp.
“Yeah,” he agrees.
Michael holds back a grin but nods as he disappears inside.
We both look at each other but don’t say a word. I don’t know what would’ve happened if Fergie hadn’t interrupted us.
Would I have stopped it from going further than a kiss? I don’t know.
Back inside, Ryker and Zane are holding up Keelan and walking him to the exit.
Keelan’s singing Every Rose Has It’s Thorn out loud and the guy who kissed me says, “Get that loser outta here!” His friends laugh.
Joshua stills next to me. “Wait a second,” he says, stalking off toward the guy.
Before I can stop him, his fist goes flying into the guys face. The guy stumbles back and Joshua shakes his hand like it hurt but turns back to me.
One of the guy’s friends lunges for Joshua and I scream for him to turn around. He does, but the other guys’ fist lands a blow to his cheek.
The Heatwave players abandon Keelan with Rina and Kesley and go to help Joshua. Rina motions for me to follow them out.
Ryker grabs a guy by the t-shirt shoving him off of Joshua. “Go,” he says to me.
“I should be in there,” Keelan says, pointing back to the bar.
“No, you really shouldn’t,” Rina says.
“What, you don’t think I can take him? I can take him,” he slurs.
“I’m sure you can, slugger.” Rina sets him against a palm tree.
It’s only a few seconds later when the door slams open and Ryker, Zane, Michael and Joshua all come pouring out.
The bartender shakes his fist and yells at us not to come back around making trouble.
Kesley laughs. “We’re too old for this shit.”
“Agreed,” Rina says, still holding up Keelan.
“What was that for?” I say, turning to Joshua.
“He was dogging on Lando.”
I squint up at him. “Was that the only reason?”
He rubs his cheek where he took the hit. And looks down at me. “You and me both know that wasn’t the only reason, Princess.”
“Let’s get out of here,” Ryker says. “Fucking troublemakers. I can’t take you guys anywhere.”
The group laughs.
“Spoken like a true daddy, Balsy Bear. You’re ready for this baby,” Fergie says.
“Here,” Rina motions toward the barely standing Keelan. “I’ll call us a rideshare.”
“What? We can walk,” Zane says. “Ry and I got him.”
They flank Keelan and hoist him up. Both tall enough to pick him up so his feet aren’t dragging.
Rina shrugs. “Alright, let’s go. Thanks for the mess I have to clean up again, boys. At least we're not in Houston.”
She puts her phone away.
Joshua takes his place next to me. His hand brushing against my thigh as we walk silently following the others.
“There’s a jacuzzi back at the house,” he finally says. “I’m thinking of sitting in it for a bit when we get back.” He looks over at me. “You… wanna join?”
Every fiber of my being wants to say yes. But I think I can guess what would happen if I’m alone in a jacuzzi, half-naked with my boss.
I’ll be just another number. And I can’t have that.
“I’m tired,” I say, looking at him.
“Okay,” he says, trying to hard to hide his disappointment.
Almost everyone’s settled in for the night but I can’t sleep. I can hear some of the guys’ voices carrying from outside. They must’ve joined Joshua after I shut him down.
I press my fingers against my lips, remembering what if felt like to taste him. He was sweet and intoxicating. I couldn’t get enough of him. But I don’t trust myself alone with him. Not now that I know what it feels like to have him pressed against me.
That’s how the others felt, too.
I huff and roll over trying to bury myself deeper into the sheets. Maybe if I dig myself in far enough. I won’t actually be tempted to go looking for trouble.
A soft moan carries from the room next door. There’s a light thumping of a bed.
I squeeze my eyes shut, trying to tune out the sounds.
I’m not sure which couple claimed the room next to mine. But I know I’m screwed if I have to listen to them go at it like rabbits for two nights.
I can hear them whispering to each other through the wall. And I can only imagine what their saying.
Is she telling him what she wants? Is he telling her he’ll give it to her? Am I crazy to be eavesdropping on two humans having sex?
I pull a pillow over my head. And quickly remove it, frustrated.
My core pulses with need. I feel empty. And I know exactly what I need to feel. I remember him pressed against me, earlier. The hardness in his pants, undeniable.
The feel of his lips on mine. The way he trailed them down my neck when we danced. The stranger watching us.
My mind mixes the two scenes and we’re back on the dance floor. His hands holding me close to him. He’s pressed against my backside. Hand around my throat. I love how it feels.
My hands disappear under the blankets and in my mind it’s his hands trailing under my shorts. His fingers finding that pulsing spot between my thighs in need of him.
He slides them over my slit and I moan for him.
“There you go, Princess,” he whispers against my neck. “You think you can pretend I don’t make you wet.”
He slides his fingers further, dipping them into me.
“Let me show you how good I can make you feel.”
He circles my clit and I press into him. The music is pulsing. Nobody else is around. It’s just us. His hands working magic on me. His lips on my neck. Me coming undone under his touch.
More moans. More thumps. The muffled cries next door grow in intensity. And I lose myself in thoughts of the man I can’t have.
He whispers into my ear, “Come for me, Princess. Let me feel you pulse against my fingers.”
I let go. Crying out and quickly covering my cries with my other hand as I ride out my pleasure to thoughts of Joshua.
The couple next door quiets too.
And now the shame washes over me. I just made myself come. To the sounds of someone else having sex.
Who am I?