16. Lucas
Lucas
16
Idon’t get much sleep that night. How can I when Ezrah is curled so sweetly in my arms? My hands drink in his skin, play with his hair, trace his sleeping face. I can still feel his lips against mine, my skin buzzing with the joy and excitement of it all. He came to me.
I know this doesn’t necessarily mean he wants me the way I want him, but it’s hard not to hope. As I lay here tonight I feel like I’m getting a glimpse of our future together.
I picture the two of us, sitting in Ezrah’s living room, Dil playing on the floor, he’d lean in to kiss me and-
I shake my head. I need to stop. He isn’t agreeing to anything. He hasn’t said he wants anything long-term from me.
For all I know this is just his way of blowing off steam.
No, I need to give it time.
But for now, this is mine, even if it’s only in my mind. I thought when he woke up that Ezrah would be different somehow. More skittish maybe? Or more comfortable.
But he isn’t. For most of the morning, it seems like nothing has changed. That is until our morning walk. Then he takes my hand.
It takes everything in my being not to sweep him up in my arms. Still, I resist the urge to do anything but go about our usual business.
And it doesn’t stop there. To my absolute delight, he only gets more affectionate as the day goes on. He’s still hesitant at times, but he also seems to be getting comfortable putting his head on my chest or kissing me first.
I know, no matter what happens, I’ll never forget the first time he kissed me. Not the passionate kiss with a purpose he gave me yesterday, but a kiss someone gives just because they can.
We’re sitting on the porch, drinking tea during one of Dil’s naps. My arm is wrapped around his shoulders, and I’m listening while he tells me how he met Beatrice.
“So it was the first job that ever had me go on a set. I still don’t get a lot of those, but they do come up occasionally. I’d just finished up my first day and I was exhausted.”
“So what do they have you do on set?” I ask.
“Most of the time it's on-the-fly rewrites or assisting with creative decisions, but for that one, I honestly don’t know why they wanted me there. Mostly I just stood around. They said it was good experience. Anyway, when I was finally heading out, I got to my car and there was this scraggly, pissed-off-looking cat just standing on the top looking at me. I figured she’d run off when I got closer, but she didn’t budge. I opened the door and she hopped in like it was her car and I was her chauffeur. I said fuck, gave up, drove home, then she followed me inside like she belonged there. She’s been with me ever since, and judging my life choices every step of the way.”
I tilt my head back in a laugh. Beatrice is very judgy. When I finish and I look back at him, Ezrah is staring at me with the strangest expression.
“What is it?”
His nose wrinkles in a way that makes me want to kiss it.
Then, he leans in, bringing our lips together. It’s nothing more than a swift, affectionate peck. As soon as his lips brush mine they’re gone. Still, it’s so perfect I almost wonder if I’d dreamed it.
The flush on his face and the way he avoids my eyes, however, tells me it was real.
“What was that for?” I smile at him.
“Didn’t know I needed a reason,” he grumbles, crossing his arms.
“You don’t, and neither do I.”
Before he can answer, I lean in, pressing my lips to his. I do my best to put every ounce of emotion I feel into it. All of the love and gratitude in my heart. I hope it shows him half of what his simple, chaste kiss means to me.
Even Beatrice is happy. She’s hiding less and less, opting instead to lay in the sun where it shines through the window. She even lays with us on the sofa for movie time once or twice.
Despite everything going on, I know I could be happy like this for a long time. It was selfish, I know that, but I don’t want to lose Ezrah, and I’m afraid of what will happen when this situation gets resolved.
Of course, nothing lasts forever.
I’m fast asleep when something jerks me awake. I don't know what’s wrong. I listen for a moment, but can't hear anything out of the ordinary. The first rays of sunlight hadn't even begun to creep in yet, still stuck at the tree line.
Immediately I glance down, tightening my grip on Ezrah. He’s safe. He’s in my arms.
My eyes fly to the wall separating us from Dil and for a brief moment I wish I’d suggested keeping her crib in our- his room. Untangling myself from him, I rise carefully to my feet. I need to check on her.
Just as I go to open our bedroom door, I hear rustling from somewhere outside. I freeze. Then there’s a sound almost like a laugh.
My hair stands on end.
That isn’t an animal.
I move as quickly as I can without making a sound and turn the door knob silently, creeping into Dil's room.
I let out a sigh of relief when I see she is still sound asleep. I slip into my room to grab my handgun from my safe and moved to the front door intending to do a perimeter check. When I make it to the door, I hear footsteps racing away. I peer cautiously through the window, but there’s nothing except darkness. Weapon at the ready, I push the door open and freeze.
Taped to the wood is an all too familiar envelope. I reach for it like I’m picking a bomb.
I could just get rid of it. Ezrah doesn't need to know. If I just got rid of the note, I could handle it myself.
But I know I can't
The whole reason we came here was so Allen wouldn't know where Ezrah was. Obviously, now he does.
We aren't safe here anymore.
I take a deep breath and go back to the bedroom. Ezrah is still fast asleep, blissfully unaware of what just happened. It feels like it takes an eternity to cross the short distance and sit on the bed.
My heart catches in my throat. I reach out, running my fingers through his hair. I’m already mourning the end of this interlude. I want nothing more than to let him sleep, oblivious to what’s going on. If I could take him and Dil to the car and just drive away I would, but he deserves to know.
I take a deep breath and quietly call his name. "Ezrah."
He doesn't so much as stir.
"Ezrah," I try again a little louder. “Ezrah, you need to get up,” I give him a light shake.
He groans, pushing up on his elbows. “What’s wrong?” He sits up and goes still like a deer in headlights. “Why do you have a gun? What’s going on?”
I hold out the letter without a word.
“No,” his hands are shaking as he reaches to take it. He stops a few inches short of grabbing it, almost as if he’s unable to close the last little distance. His eyes flicker to me.
“Do you want me to read it?”
He nods.
“Out loud or-”
He shakes his head. “Just-just tell me what I need to know.”
I take a deep breath before opening it.
MY Ezrah,
I have to say I’m very disappointed in you. I thought you’d have come back to me by now. Back to where you belong, but I can see you need a little more persuading. I hired a PI, that’s how I found you. He specializes in catching cheating spouses. He’s seen you with your little boy toy.
I can’t believe you would do this to me!
After all we’ve been through.
Well, don’t worry. I’m coming to get you. Be ready for me.
Your only love
Allen
Then I quickly flip through the photos. They show the pair of us taking Dil out for her daily walks, holding hands, and kissing. There was one of us on the porch, drinking coffee, I was leaning against him, laughing, and one was taken through the bedroom window in the middle of making love.
“What the fuck,” I breath, eyes locked on the images.
“Let me see,” Ezrah rips them from my hands before I can react.
He stares at the images in disbelief, then stands quickly. “We need to get out of here,” he says, panicked.
“I know. Give me a minute to call Alden, and come up with what we need to do.” I lean in, pressing our lips together in a desperate kiss. “Don’t worry. I’ll protect you. Just be ready to go when I come back.”
He gives me a tight nod.
I go to the kitchen to make the call. I don’t want to wake Dil up until we’re ready to leave.
Even though it’s early, Marie answers the phone. “Lucas, we weren’t expecting a call from you today. What’s happened?”
“We’ve got a problem. Allen, Ezrah’s ex, he found us.”
“How?” Maria is efficient as always.
“I don’t know. His letter said something about a PI but I can’t worry about that now. We need to leave the house. I’m looking for clearance to take them straight to the airport so we can fly to headquarters. Can you have tickets ready? Do you have the baby’s name and birthdate?”
“Don’t worry, I’ll take care of it and text you the info. Be safe.”
“I will. We’ll see you soon.”
I hang up the phone and quickly gather Dil’s things, leaving everything I don’t think she’ll need right away. I prep a bottle for her then shove my things in a duffle on the way to her room. She doesn’t even wake, the sweet little thing, just grumbles through a change and goes back to sleep in my arms. I lay her back down in the living room so I can pack the bags out.
When I get to the car, I frown. I can’t put my finger on it, but something doesn’t seem right. On the surface, nothing appears different. It’s parked right where I left it, and the doors are locked, but something that just feels off. I do a walk-around inspection, and even quickly check the undercarriage. Nothing.
The pressure must be getting to me.