Chapter Twelve Rose
Four Months Later
PREGNANT.
That is the word that I am staring at on the five pregnancy test I have taken in the last hour.
There is absolutely no way. I’m on the pill.
I mean sure we’ve been doing this whole fucking situationship or whatever you want to call it now for over a year.
Sure the amount of times has dwindled and I feel like that would be my karma because he’s pulled away, now I’m sitting here knocked up.
Not just knocked up, but knocked up by an emotionally constipated man that I fucking love despite the fact that he is fucking emotionally constipated.
I’m the dumbest woman alive. But there is no way in hell I am going to be like Liza.
His ass is going to know early and not just when he decides he wants to fuck me again.
I’m not going to sit around and wait for him to decide that he is looking to meet up with me.
I need to go figure out what we are going to do now.
I am going to have to confront him about what he wants to do.
The man does not seem to be all that concerned about possible pregnancy with me since he never fucking wraps his dick.
I guess that is also irresponsible on my part.
I’m not an idiot, but right now I sure feel like one.
Before I get the courage to stand up and head out of the room the door slams open.
“Rose, guess—-” Abby starts to say and then abruptly stops when she sees what is sitting on the counter of my bathroom.
“Um, I’m sorry, do you have any boundaries?” I ask.
“Well, I didn’t think it would be a big deal since you know, we have peed in front of each other before. Hell, we’ve done that while one of us was showering. We don’t have boundaries. We are like soulmates. But apparently you’ve been keeping a very big secret from me. What the fuck is this?”
Abby is practically yelling by the end of that statement.
“Can you keep it down? I don’t need the other girls to come in here!”
“They aren’t here! That is what I was coming to tell you! The contractor called and they finished up your house. It is amazing what the hell your daddy’s money can fucking do. Now the girls headed out to get paint supplies and all that shit to start painting to your specifications. So your house,
your guest house and your barn is done. They will be starting on the business shit soon. But back to the matter at hand. What the fuck? How are you pregnant?!!?”
I sigh and look up at her.
“Well Abby when a man and a woman decide they want to—”
“Would you shut up! I meant how are you pregnant, have you not heard of protection? I thought you were on the pill? Rage has been a major asshole, how the fuck are you still letting that man in your bed? He is so fucking hot and cold. I don’t fucking understand.”
“Okay, so yes I am on the pill. That’s about it. I guess. Yes he has been hot and cold lately and I really am just hoping it is because of everything that has been going on with the club. I mean they had all the shit happen with Missy and Stray. Then the twins were kidnapped and missing for months.
Sophie being kidnapped and her babies being ripped out of her, I mean she’s still in a coma. I’m just hoping that once shit calms down maybe we can re-evaluate our relationship or whatever. I mean now we have a baby coming. That changes everything about our relationship.
I know that back in January he felt the same thing I did, there are even glimpses of it when we are together now. I honestly just think he is scared. But I believe that I mean something to him and it is going to be okay. He might not be thrilled about this development,
but I’m sure he will not be super upset either. It will just be a change.”
“I swear Rose, sometimes your blind fucking optimism is going to be the death of all of us. When are you going to tell him?”
“I think I’m going to head over to the clubhouse now and see if I can talk to him. He deserves to know and I refuse to be like Liza and not tell him right away. I love the girl and boy can she hold a fucking grudge. She should’ve told him before he found out about it. “
“Alright, well let’s go. Then we can schedule a doctor's appointment and make sure everything is good.”
I nod my head and head out the door towards hopefully a happy moment and not one that is going to cause major devastation in my wake.
I had this unnerving feeling like something bad was going to happen.
I really should have learned at some point that I need to pick better men.
My phone buzzes in my pocket and I look and it is another call from an unknown caller.
I ignore it and block the number, whoever is sending me messages and calling has really creeped me out.
Finn did look into everything and found out that there was some stuff in my apartment.
So he hooked me up with some better security so no one can get into my apartment.
He put cameras up, but really there is only so much he could do from Maine especially without me wanting to tell anyone.
He’s also been keeping an eye on everything when I send him the numbers that text me. Got to love my cousins.
Pulling up to the clubhouse you can see that there is a party happening or something. Abby and I get out of the car and we head inside.
“Where do you think he is? Does he still hang out around here when there is a party and you're not here?”
“As far as I know he still does do shit with the club even if I am not around. He’s told me a few times he drinks with the brothers.”
Before I can say anything else, Abby grabs me by the arm. I turn and look at her.
“What is it?”
“I think we should leave.”
“What? Why? I’m not leaving before I find him, I have to tell him what is going on?”
“Alright, well, let's at least walk quietly over there.”
I follow where she points and what I see has my heart feeling like it is being put through a meat grinder.
Rage is sitting on the couch with fucking Kitty on his lap.
The stupid bitch that has given me trouble since the first time I stepped foot into this clubhouse.
The bitch he told me he was no longer seeing or fucking around with.
I notice that Dragon is heading over so I take that as my cue to grab Abby’s hand and walk over towards the wall where I know we are bound to hear what is going on and what is being said.
“Rage, what the fuck are you doing brother?” We hear Dragon ask just as we get to a place we can eavesdrop.
“What does it look like I’m doing, brother? I’m letting off some steam. I am trying to enjoy my night. What’s your problem?”
“What’s my problem? Aren’t you supposed to be seeing Rose? I thought she was your woman, so what is this bitch doing on your lap?”
“Dragon, leave him alone. He had a long day and he wants a little bit of love. That stuck up bitch can’t give him the release he needs. It’s about time he came back to me. He’s been fucking around with that fat bitch and then a couple other girls around here.
Don’t know why it took him this long to come back to me.” Kitty says.
Her voice is so fucking whiney and nasty, but what she said has my heart beating in my chest.
I know she is referring to me as the fat bitch because like the gem she is, any girl that has curves is fat.
Sorry bitch not everyone wants to be a stick figure and some of us have tits and an ass.
But to know that she is saying he’s been fucking other women around the club is making me want to throw up.
I get a little closer to the wall and wait for his reply. I hear a shriek and a thump.
“What the actual fuck Rage!”
“Don’t talk about her like that, you need to go find someone else. I thought you were over being a petty bitch, but it turns out you're still a toxic whore.”
“What the fuck ever!” I hear Kitty yell before I no longer hear her obnoxious heels on the floor.
“No, for real Rage, I thought you were with Rose. You have been with her as long as I was with Liza. Actually even longer because I fucked up and have spent months without her.”
“Yeah, well I never told Rose we were exclusive. So what if I still fuck the club girls? What’s it to her? I never made her any promises. I never said we were anything that we weren’t. I’m not like you and the other brothers.
I don’t fucking want to settle down with some bitch who is going to think she can control every aspect of my life. Plus I don’t need any fucking kids. Never wanted them. Never will. Rose was a piece of ass. She was a great fuck, her pussy is probably some of the best I have ever had,
but I’m not going to let some bitch trap me ino being with just her. I’m still fucking young, I’ve got my oats to sow all over the fucking place. She’s probably off spreading her legs for half the fucking city. It didn’t take much for me to get into her bed.
I’m sure that isn’t something that takes a lot for other fuckers either.”
“Wow, Rage. Wow. You know, I regret making Liza even think for one second I was fucking someone else, but you actually have been fucking other people. What is going to happen if she finds out? What is going to happen if one day you find out she’s knocked the fuck up like I just found out about Liza?
”
“Honestly, if she showed up pregnant telling me it was my kid, I’d tell her I had no interest and I do not believe her. I don’t need some fucking patch chaser trying to trap my ass. I mean she’s a broke as fuck college student, I’m sure she’s probably looking for a nice easy ride through life.
She’d need to provide me with some solid paternity testing for me to even believe one word that was coming out of her mouth. I don’t need to have some bitch coming here claiming some other fuckers bastard is mine. Like I said, she was easy enough for me to convince to get into bed,
she’s probably off letting other fuckers do the same. Not saying Liza is doing that to you, but Rose should know where I fucking stand. We never professed our love for one another, fuck I don’t even love her. I love that pussy of hers, that’s for sure. She has a fucking golden one.
But if she came here telling me she was pregnant, her golden pussy wouldn’t be enough for me to give her money and my patch. So we’d wait for results, then I’d throw some money at her. That is probably all she would want anyway.”
“Wow—--”
I put my hand on my stomach as I hear everything he says and everything else starts to feel like I’m driving through a tunnel.
I don’t hear any more of their conversation because I feel like he just pulled my heart out of my chest and stomped on it.
I feel the need to go home and scrub myself raw.
Or better yet, I think I need my mama. I can’t deal with all this.
How could I have been so blind, I thought because he was with me all those times that he wouldn’t go looking for it from someone else.
I should’ve listened to my family. I never should’ve gotten wrapped up in a man like him.
I should’ve also really read between the lines when he wouldn’t open up to me about anything. He has so many secrets.
“What a piece of shit. I am going to kill him.” I hear Abby say next to me, but I am too lost in a fog to stop her from rounding the corner.
“You’re a real piece of shit, you know that?”
“What the fuck! Abby? What are you doing here?” I hear Rage ask. “Is Rose here?”
I don’t wait for her to answer, I run towards the exit of the club.
I’m pulling my phone out before I even get there and order a ride to pick me up.
I need to get the fuck out of here. I need to clear my head and I need to give myself some space.
Fuck telling him anything right now. I just learned about this news and I didn’t think he’d be happy about it, but what I just heard rocked everything I knew.
I have so many questions. I don’t know how I am ever going to look at someone again.
I don’t wait more than a couple minutes before the cab I ordered gets to the end of the road where I am waiting for them. I hop in the car and look at the driver.
“Can you take me to the airport please? I need to go to the airport.”
“Sure thing.”
I then close the divider and look out the window willing myself not to cry over this man. He isn’t worth a single fucking tear.
I. AM. DONE. with Caleb “Rage” fucking Matthews. He can eat a fucking dick.