Chapter 34
CHAPTER
THIRTY-FOUR
brUCE
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Craig Nottingham : I bet you’re all regretting your hype for McBride after tonight. The guy was a DISASTER.
Todd Ferguson : It wasn’t pretty. But everyone has an off game now and then. He’ll pick back up next game!
Craig Nottingham : No one has an “off game” at the end of the $^@ I even tried taking a sleeping pill the night before the game to get some rest. But no. My mind wanders right back to my conversation with Farrah two mornings ago.
I can hardly even stand to be in my own home. Everything reminds me of her. When I walk through the living room, the couch makes me think of the morning we watched a movie…then when I go upstairs and head to my room, I pass the guestroom she slept in. Hell, I can’t even be in my kitchen anymore without staring at the oven and wishing she was there happily baking something.
How could she doubt my feelings for her? How could she doubt they’ll last? What I want to do is find Connor and ream him for making Farrah feel like no one could love her for more than her ability to have children. The idea is absurd.
A long life with Farrah Remington is all I need. We could be the cool aunt and uncle who spoil our friends’ and relative’s kids, we could travel whenever we wanted—outside of hockey season—we could have pets…a cat might be nice. And, down the road, if we decided—mutually—we wanted kids, we could adopt. Adoption is a wonderful thing that I’m very grateful for. Even just helping out with Jackson has added so much joy to my life.
But Farrah is the only thing I need. That’s it. There will never be anyone more attractive and wonderful to me than her. Now how to make her see that, because I’m not giving up. Remy told me to fight to make her see she’s worthy of love, and I plan to do just that.
We don’t have another game until tomorrow night, which means tonight I’m a volunteer lackey for Melarrah Events. The event is a birthday party for our general manager’s six-year-old daughter. I spoke to the GM, Tom, about it before the game last night. He and his wife wanted to make sure she didn’t feel neglected in the midst of all the playoff madness, and I respect the hell out of them for that.
Jackson is coming with me for our big brother night this month. It probably wasn’t his first choice of activities, but it’s a birthday party…he can at least have some delicious cake.
I smile, feeling hopeful for the first time since leaving Farrah’s apartment a few days ago. She will see she can’t get rid of me no matter how hard she tries. She can give me her worst, and I can handle it.
No more wallowing for me—it’s time for action.
“So, you’re going to show Farrah you love her by setting up chairs and a bouncy house?” Jackson asks as we pull up to my general manager’s mansion outside of Alexandria. His voice sounds skeptical.
I withhold an eye roll as I tousle his hair and usher him toward the back gate where I know the girls are already getting started with the décor. Mel filled me in.
“Sometimes it’s the small things, my guy. Showing up every day, no matter what. Big or small. I’ll be there every time she turns around, waiting for her to see I’m the love of her life.”
He shrugs. “I hope so. I like Farrah. You guys make each other happy.”
I tousle his hair, and he pushes my hand away. “Aw, you little softy!”
“Get off of me,” he says, but there’s humor in his tone.
When we reach the wrought iron black gate, I unlatch it and swing it open, allowing Jackson to walk through before me.
He glances around, jaw agape. “Wow. This is the fanciest yard I’ve ever seen.”
I’m impressed as well; I’ve never been here before. Tom has an expansive backyard with lush, green grass and expert landscaping. At one end of the yard there’s a massive covered pool, and on the other end there’s an inground trampoline off to one side and a big, wooden playground beside it. Mel and Farrah are on the patio unloading boxes, West is with them making sure Mel doesn’t overdo it. Farrah is wearing a black sundress that hits just above her knees and has little straps over her tanned shoulders. Her hair is down and curled and I know what it smells like without even being close enough to inhale the scent. The sight of her sends a jolt through my chest. I’m happy to see her and yet still devastated by our last conversation.
West spots us first and waves. “Finally, some more muscle!” he yells.
I force a smile on my face and flex my arm. “Happy to be of service.”
“I was talking about Jackson!” he yells back.
Jackson grins.
Mel smiles at us, not noticing the shocked expression on Farrah’s face.
As we get closer, Farrah avoids eye contact altogether. For a second, I wonder if I shouldn’t have bombarded her. Maybe she genuinely doesn’t want to be with me and wants me to stay away.
I shake the thought. I’ve seen the way she looks at me, I’ve felt the way she kisses me. I saw the agony written all over her face when she told me we’d be better off without each other.
No, Remy was right. I need to show up; to show her I’ll stick in there through the hard times. I’ll be her rock when times are tough, and I’ll be her soft place to land when life is challenging.
This is the only way I know how to show her that.
“How can I help? Put us to work.”
Farrah briefly glances up at me, her sad blue eyes give me the urge to pull her into my arms, the desire to do just that almost overwhelming. But I stand firm where I’m at.
Mel points toward a giant pink bag in the middle of the yard. “You can set up the bouncy house.”
“Done.” I shoot one last glance at the dark-haired beauty I can’t get out of my head and walk toward the bouncy house. I wore my black athletic shorts, the ones that show off my quads, I hope she notices my legs when I’m expertly setting up the most important part of the party.
Thirty minutes later, I’m drenched in sweat. I feel like I’ve just repeated last night’s game. Setting up a bouncy house that looks like a princess castle is harder than I imagined. But it’s done.
My grey tee is plastered to my pecs, I glance down and try to pull my shirt away from my body, but it just adheres right back to my skin. When I look up again, I notice Farrah staring at my chest from across the room. Her eyes move up my body to find me staring at her and she instantly looks away, turning bright red.
A few days ago, before she tried to break up with me, I would’ve loved the blush. I would’ve teased her until she smiled and then I would’ve pulled her into my arms and kissed her breathless. But now, I hate that she feels ashamed and embarrassed to look at me like that. It’s like she believes we’ve actually broken up.
West strides over, his back is turned toward the girls. He raises his eyebrows and grimaces in a this isn’t going well for you, is it? kind of way.
He pats my shoulder. “Give it time.”
I shake my head. West could’ve been with Mel much sooner, but he convinced himself he was doing her a favor by staying away. He also had some kind of idiotic pact with her older brother about not dating her. Actually, that’s a lot like my predicament, but Farrah is the West here.
“Hey, what made you finally man up and seal the deal with Mel?”
He blows out a breath, causing the front of his dark blond hair to fly up in the air. “I think I just realized that if years had gone by and my feelings for her still hadn’t faded, they never would. I knew I wanted her and didn’t care what it cost to achieve that. Even my relationship with my best friend.”
I listen, silently mulling over his words. “Yeah, I’m gonna be honest, that doesn’t help me at all.”
West chuckles. “I think if you give it time and keep fighting…she’ll see in you what I saw in Mel. It’s already there, she’s just choosing not to acknowledge it to protect herself.”
“I can’t really fault her for protecting herself after all she’s been through.”
He shakes his head. “Nope. You just have to be patient. And be ready to jump when she comes around.”
“Oh, I plan to be ready.”
He smiles. “You’re nothing if not persistent. Maybe Colby would give you better advice.” West cups a hand over his mouth so the girls won’t hear, even though they’re all the way across the yard. “He built Noel a library to win her heart.”
I scoff. “Farrah would rather I build her a bakery.” The words have my mind drifting to how impressed she was with my oven…hmm.
“I see your wheels spinning, but you can’t actually build her a bakery, man.”
Jackson slides out of the bouncy house and strides over to us. “So, what next?”
To my surprise, Farrah starts making her way to where we’re standing, nervously touching her arm as she walks. She focuses on West, trying to ignore me, just like she used to.
“Hey, West, could you get the birthday cake from the car for me?”
“I’ll get it,” I say, forcing her to look over at me.
She gives me a resigned look and starts walking toward the gate. I follow quickly. As soon as we’re through the gate and out of sight, she whirls on me.
Farrah crosses her arms and settles an icy gaze on me. “Bruce, what are you doing here?”
I hold my arms out at my sides. “Helping. Obviously.”
She closes her eyes, and her mouth moves like she’s counting. “Don’t make this harder than it needs to be.” Her eyes meet mine, and for the first time today I see vulnerability there. “Please.”
“I’m not letting you go without a fight, Farrah.”
Something sparks in her eyes, something more than annoyance. It’s so brief I wonder if it happened at all. Before I can analyze it too much, she whirls again, this time away from me and toward her car. She unlocks it and opens the back end where a tall cake box is surrounded by items to keep it from sliding around.
Farrah taps her foot impatiently as she waits for me to get the cake out. That’s fine, I can deal with her sass as long as she doesn’t give me those sad eyes again.
When I lift the cake box, I’m surprised by how heavy it is. “This is just a cake for a tiny little girl… right?”
“Yes. But it’s filled with pudding between each layer.”
My eyebrows shoot up. “Your first one like this?”
She meets my gaze, giving me the faintest hint of a smile. “Yeah.”
“I’m so proud of you.”
She seems to bask in my praise for all of point-five seconds before she remembers she’s ‘better off without me.’
“Bruce,” she reprimands. “Stop.” She looks away again and stalks off, like she can’t get away from me fast enough.
With a sigh, I stride carefully back into the yard. Tom Parker is standing on the patio now. It’s very seldom I see the man in anything but a suit and tie. But today he’s wearing linen pants, leather sandals, and a knit polo. His hair is combed neatly and there’s a little girl beside him wearing a yellow dress. Her curly, dark hair is braided back into pigtails. She looks like her father but the cuter version.
“McBride,” Tom greets me with a smile. “Is that the cake?”
I nod.
He chuckles and glances at Farrah. “I can’t believe you trusted this guy with the cake,” he teases, shooting me a wink.
“Farrah can trust me with anything,” I answer quickly.
Farrah blushes, and Tom looks between the two of us curiously.
“Here,” he says, holding his arms out. “Let me take that inside.”
I carefully transfer it to him, and he disappears through the back doors and into the large house.
His daughter takes advantage of his absence and runs toward the bouncy house.
“Bruce,” West calls from a few yards away where a cart holding white wooden chairs is sitting. “Help me set up the chairs and tables.”
I glance over at Farrah to see her crossing the yard where Mel is assembling some kind of balloon arch with a floral backdrop. There’s a table setup in front of the arch and I wonder if that’s where they’ll put the cake.
She doesn’t even look back at me as she walks away.
The ache I felt after she ended things is suddenly feeling stronger and more permanent. Maybe this really is over.
Jackson comes to stand beside me. “You okay?”
“Not really,” I say with a sigh.