TWENTY-TWO
THAT WAS A FUCK UP
Oliver
‘Are you planning on standing at the window all afternoon?’ asked Dom from the other side of the room, where he was looking through some invoices. ‘Or just until they all come back from looking at the wellness suite?’
‘Was just admiring the scenery,’ I replied as I continued to track Alex, Grainger and the three new employees. They had appeared around the edge of the loch just a few seconds ago. ‘Have you got a handle on everything?’
‘I won’t take offence from such an insulting question.’
I dug my hands into my pockets, aware of the sense of relief as Alex and Grainger parted company with the others.
She had been on edge at lunch, more so than I imagined she would be.
The threat of what had been going on was affecting her more than I realised.
It bothered me that I hadn’t picked up on that sooner.
‘Any more news on the name?’
‘Nothing. It’s like he vanished into thin air. Might just as well not exist anymore.’
Alex had moved out of sight now. I had hoped she’d look this way, but she hadn’t. ‘That’s not the answer I was hoping for.’
‘I’m still digging.’ Dom paused. ‘Why don’t you just go over and see her?’
It was a good question.
‘We’ve got that call in ten minutes with the contractors for the outbuildings conversion.’
While I was going to be living up here at the gatehouse with Noah, the disused outbuildings that had once been for livestock were being converted into self-contained apartments for Dom and Aaron. And Will, if he ever wanted it.
‘I can handle the call,’ said Dom.
‘I’ll be back in time for it,’ I said, not even bothering to grab my coat.
A minute later, I was on the porch of Alex’s lodge. I hesitated. Maybe I should have texted her to warn her. I got out my phone.
I know this is short notice, but I’m on your porch.
A few seconds later, the door opened. My heart did an unexpected little jump as I looked at her. Fuck, I had missed her.
She stepped back to let me in, closing the door behind me. Then I didn’t hold back. I moved towards her, wrapping my arms around her, kissing her.
‘I’ve been wanting to do that all week,’ I said. ‘That was torture sitting next to you at lunch and not being able to touch you.’
‘I’m glad you’re here,’ she said into my neck.
She held onto me. I could hear her slowing her breathing. That thing she did when her anxiety was ramped up. I rubbed her back gently. ‘I missed you,’ I said into her hair.
After a moment, she pulled back and looked at me, her face serious. ‘Are we going to be able to do this? Is this going to work? I mean, I don’t even know what this is.’
‘We’ll find a way,’ I said. ‘I want to find a way, if you do.’
She looked down, and I had that sudden gut feeling you get right before something monumental happens.
Something bad happens. ‘Lexi,’ I said gently.
‘Don’t be scared.’ I wasn’t certain who I was reassuring at that point.
I just knew I didn’t want to lose Alex so soon after finding her. ‘Come and sit down.’
I led her over to the sofa and sat down with her, dipping my head to meet her gaze.
‘I wish we’d had time to do all this before you came here. I wish we’d had time to get to know each other without the added pressure of work and me being your boss.’
‘I could find another job.’
‘No.’ I said the word before she’d finished speaking. ‘I don’t want you to do that. Is it what you really want?’
She shook her head. ‘Not really.’
‘Okay. Let’s not have that conversation again.’ I tipped her chin up, so she was looking at me. ‘I’m not big on secrets. The whole ethos of Laker Security and Risk Estate is being honest with each other. We need to be able to trust each other. You know what it’s like.’
She nodded. ‘What are you suggesting?’
I gave a shrug. ‘We don’t keep our relationship a secret. Start as we mean to go on. We don’t have to broadcast it. I’m not about to put it in a company newsletter. People will work it out for themselves.’
‘I think Grainger may have already.’
‘Not much gets past him.’
She lapsed back into silence, and I let her sit with it for a while. When she looked back up at me, I could see genuine sadness in her eyes. My heart suddenly felt heavy as it braced itself for pain.
‘I’m not ready to go public.’ She got to her feet. ‘I just need a bit more time.’
She was more scared than I thought. I had hoped she’d feel safe once Dom and the new arrivals were here. I stood with her and went over to her, putting my hands on her shoulders and kissing her just behind the ear.
‘We go at your pace.’ She turned, and I held her like I had that first night when she’d come to me. ‘I’ve got you.’
I went back over the gatehouse for the call, feeling no more settled about Alex than I had been earlier. Something had shifted in the week when I hadn’t been here, but I didn’t want to push her on it. I just had to do what I’d been doing and wait it out. Let her come to me.
‘You just missed Grainger,’ said Dom as I walked in. ‘Put in a request for cameras at the wellness suite.’
‘Really? I thought we had that covered.’
‘We have. I’ve just put it on the priority list. Be done next week sometime.’
‘Good.’
The call with the contractors went well. Everything was on schedule for the conversion of the outbuildings as soon as the weather broke. In the meantime, Dom and Aaron would stay at the gatehouse whenever they were here.
We spent the rest of the afternoon updating the various progress charts we had going.
The outbuildings. The main lodge renovation.
The stables. The shooting range. The outdoor activities.
The list was endless, but Aaron was on it when it came to data.
That was one thing he didn’t joke around with.
His analytical brain knew exactly what was happening, where, and who was involved.
My phone rang, and I snatched it up, hoping it was Alex. Dom raised his eyebrows but returned to the paperwork he was reviewing.
The screen told me it wasn’t Alex. It was Heather Potts Flowers.
‘Oliver Laker speaking.’
‘Ah, Mr Laker, Heather Potts here.’
‘Hello, Heather.’
We exchanged pleasantries. I had already agreed the flower arrangement contract with her earlier in the week. So, I hoped this was about the bouquet that Alex had received.
‘I spoke to my colleague in London about the flowers. Sorry it’s taken some time to get back to you, only she has been on holiday, and her staff wouldn’t release any details to me.’
‘Understandable.’ I wanted to tell her to get to the point but waited patiently for her to speak.
‘I’m afraid it’s not good news,’ she paused dramatically before continuing. ‘It was a cash transaction, so there is no record of the name. A member of staff took the order and can only remember it was a man. That’s all.’
‘No details of what he looked like?’
‘No. Sorry. And no CCTV because they only keep it for 24 hours before it’s recorded over.’
‘Okay, thank you for asking. I appreciate it.’ After ending the call as politely as possible, I dropped my phone on the desk and slumped back in my chair.
Dom put his paperwork down and looked at me. ‘Flowers for Alex?’
‘Yeah. They were delivered last week. No name. Just a card saying Happy Burns Night. See you soon. It unsettled her.’
‘I’ll take a wild guess that you think it’s related to this Henderson name.’
‘Not really a wild guess.’
‘I’ll ramp it up.’ Dom picked up his phone and made a call. I listened as he spoke to whoever he had contacts with in the Met.
‘Thanks,’ I said after he had finished.
We spent the next couple of hours going through plans and paperwork for the estate. It was satisfying to see all our hard work coming to fruition.
‘We should go and get something to eat soon,’ said Dom, looking at his watch. Buddy’s ears pricked up. ‘Yes, I know, mate. You want feeding too.’
We went over to the canteen barn. Everyone was already there, sitting at the table with their meals.
They shuffled up for us. I ignored the space Matty and Grainger made and instead inserted myself in a non-existent gap between Alex and Fletcher.
I wasn’t sure who radiated the most irritation.
It was a dick move, but it was too late to switch places now.
The conversation was already in flow, talking about previous postings and exchanging funny anecdotes, the dark humour of active military service very much alive. The atmosphere was good, and I was pleased with how the team was shaping up.
Smithy was in the middle of telling a story about his old sergeant and how he had given Smithy and another soldier a beasting one night because they had been two minutes late back.
‘He had us doing push-ups in the biggest, filthiest fucking puddle on the parade ground,’ Smithy said. ‘The worst thing was that he never said how many. It was completely fucking with our heads. We didn’t have an end goal.’
‘Harsh,’ agreed Matty.
‘Yeah. It was all right for him, he was in the fucking hut, watching us from the warm and dry. He just kept coming to the door and shouting at us. Then some fucking WREN turned up, and we didn’t see or hear from him for twenty minutes. I swear he was banging her.’
‘You should have reported him,’ said Matty.
‘I think she used to grass everyone up to him,’ said Smithy. ‘Pillow talk and all that.’
‘It never ends well. You know, relationships between two people in the same regiment. Or even the services,’ said Matty. He looked over at Alex. ‘What do you think, Doc? As a woman, I mean, do you see it as a good or a bad thing? Women are more emotional, aren’t they?’
I watched Alex carefully out of the corner of my eye as she fielded the question.
‘That’s a sweeping statement.’ She put her fork down. ‘I’ve come across men who get emotional.’
‘It’s when the women can’t handle the breakup, it all goes wrong,’ said Smithy.
‘Again, that’s a sweeping statement,’ replied Alex. ‘It happens to men too.’
‘Is that personal experience?’ asked Fletch, leaning forwards to look around me.
Alex looked at him. ‘I’m talking generally. Men can’t always handle their emotions. It’s not exclusive to women, and it’s not all women. It’s just some people.’