Chapter 10
Elizabeth felt much better physically the next morning, and she was determined not to call too much attention to the window by always appearing at it.
She sat on the bed, studying the angle of the sun through the window, and she attempted to memorise the sunlight’s angle that corresponded to the entrance of the silent woman with her first tray of the day.
The bread was clearly freshly baked and possibly the most delicious thing Elizabeth had ever smelt.
The broth and tea were just as usual, and there was a fresh glass of water.
The woman transferred the contents of the chamber pot into a bucket and then approached the closed door holding the bucket in one hand and yesterday’s empty glass in the other.
She tapped the door three times and was swiftly let out.
Just to make sure that no mistake had been made, Elizabeth quietly approached the door and tried it.
No mistake had been made.
She was confident that it would be quite a while before the woman came back, but she swiftly poured some tea onto all the most decayed portions of the wooden frame.
From what she could see, the soup had not been as effective as the tea at eating away at the wood, and the broth had been much messier, as well.
She decided that the broth would be more useful as a means to her maintaining strength.
Speeding through her meal, she still managed to savour the delicious bread, and then got the metal buckle from under her pillow.
After putting in half an hour of scraping, Elizabeth refilled the rotting portions with the rest of the tea.
Then she decided to strengthen her body by walking—or, rather, pacing.
Elizabeth strode around and around the room, still watching the way the sun lit the room.
When the woman came back to take the tray, she noted that the sunlight made a bright pool on the floor directly below the window.
She was certain that the second of three trays would arrive sooner than later, so she decided to walk some more.
The pattern of watch/walk, soak/scrape, eat/sleep repeated, and a part of Elizabeth felt she was making real progress, but a part of her worried that it would take months to break out at this rate.
Luckily, she still had so many delicious memories to help her while walking and scraping….
Darcy’s second proposal could not have been more different from his first, although he had smiled at her as began by repeating a phrase from the first go-round: “Miss Elizabeth Bennet, you must allow me to tell you how ardently I admire and love you.”
Then he thanked her for setting him on the right path, including these stirring words: “No other has ever tried to help me see how far from the path of respect and acceptance I had strayed. Only you, Elizabeth.”
He mentioned his misery when they were apart: “When I first left Hertfordshire, still swung up on the things I had been taught that I must do, I found it impossible to stop thinking of you.
But after my abhorrent proposal and your sincere and deserved censure of my words and behaviours, I found it almost impossible to eat, to sleep.
Sometimes I wondered if I still knew how to breathe.
“I realised then that I was nothing without you, but believe me, I would rather die without issue than to urge you to say yes to me out of pity, or gratitude, or worry—or anything other than love. Hold to your goal, which is to say yes only if you feel a deep and abiding love.”
When she was able to affirm that she did, in fact, love him most ardently, Darcy’s face had transformed. He had smiled at her in the past, especially during the past week…but this smile was completely unguarded, a total release of his usual restraint.
A radiant smile….
A joyful smile….
Elizabeth lost all perception of time for a while in contemplation of that unexpected but singularly attractive smile.
But a tiny sound in the hall snapped her attention back to the present. She reminded herself that, even when entertaining herself with her fondest memories, she must keep track of where she was, what she heard, what was likely to happen….