CHAPTER 46
BELLA
The wind whips against my face, my hair flying loosely behind me as Chance gallops beside Noah as he rides Grayson’s horse, Casper.
As soon as Noah led me to the barn and tacked up two horses, I knew where he was taking me. And I’ve never been more thankful.
For the first time in weeks, there’s a genuine smile on my face as we race toward the thick tree line where I know Noah’s favourite place is hidden beyond.
In the ten minutes since I climbed up onto Chance’s back, I’ve not thought about the problems and grief that have been weighing me down. My mind is blissfully empty as I put every ounce of my trust into the horse between my legs and let him carry me away from the real world for a little while.
Noah’s smile is wide beneath his cowboy hat as he and Casper fly past me and I pull back slightly on Chance’s reins, giving him the signal to slow down. I want to drag this feeling out for as long as possible.
We slow into a trot as the trees get closer and Noah casts a quick glance over his shoulder, slowing when he notices us fall back. He brings Casper to a complete stop and spins so that they’re facing me as we close the space between us.
“You okay?” He asks, slightly breathless from the ride. His cheeks are flushed red, his hazel eyes shining with a happiness I haven’t seen in him in a while.
“Yeah.” I nod. “Just want to soak this up.”
His expression softens. “We can keep riding for a bit?”
I shake my head. “No. It’s fine. The horses could use a break.”
Noah chuckles. “They’re work horses, Bells. They’re used to it.”
I roll my eyes. “Yeah, yeah. We’ll take the long way home.”
Noah nods, a smirk on his face but doesn’t say anything more as he turns around and continues into the forest.
My eyes take a moment to adjust to the drastic change in light as we trot into the shaded area, along the path that leads to the water.
Just like last time, the horses drink from the stream and Noah and I take a seat on the grassy bank, nature playing like a soundtrack around us. It’s so peaceful out here. It almost feels as though I’m miles away from home in an enchanted forest.
Beneath the thick cover of the towering evergreens, I’m free. There’s no lies, ex boyfriends, dead parents and funerals to plan.
There’s just me and Noah.
Two people who have known each other their entire lives.
“Remember when we came out here a few months ago and you asked me if I’d ever drop the facade?” Noah’s deep voice penetrates the silence.
I think back to the day he’s referring to. It feels like it’s been longer than just a few months. So much has happened in such a short amount of time.
“Yeah,” I respond, resting my head on my knees as I turn to look at him.
“Do you remember my response?” He asks, his gaze intense as he looks down at me.
“That if you found what our brothers have found with the right woman, then yes?” I reply, confused at where he’s going with this.
He nods, still not taking his eyes off me. “Do you want to know the real reason why I’ve yet to settle down, get married and have kids with someone?”
I open my mouth to say yes, but he keeps talking regardless. “It’s because none of them were you.”
My insides warm, heart picking up the pace a little in my chest.
“I have never pictured my life, my future, with anyone but you. From that day at the lake when you showed me your little notebook full of recipes and told me your dreams, I knew it would be you. When I made that promise to your brother not five minutes later, I knew it would be you. And when I had to sit back and watch from the sidelines while you fell in love with Justin, I gave up on that future entirely.”
Noah reaches out, taking one of my hands in his and running his thumb along the top in a touch so soft it causes goosebumps to break out all over my body.
“If it’s not you, then I don’t want it, Bells. You are it for me.”
Then, he pulls my hand to his chest and places my open palm over his heart, letting me feel the way it beats an unsteady rhythm beneath my touch. “I love you, Bella. Always you.”
“Noah,” I croak, my voice cracking with thick emotion.
He shakes his head, stopping me from speaking. “I don’t expect you to say it back. And I don’t expect you to just forgive me. But I want you to know, that I’m yours. Even if it takes five, ten, hell fifty years for you to take me back, I’ll still be yours.”
“And what if I don’t take you back?” I can’t help but ask. I’m so going to take him back.
His eyes flash with something that resembles fear, but he blinks it away quickly.
“Then I’ll die a lonely old man with no kids or grandkids and when people ask me about my life, I’ll tell them how I lost the greatest love of my life because I was a liar who hid behind excuses for too many years instead of taking accountability. ”
“The greatest love of your life, huh?” I ask, tone teasing slightly.
His face remains dead serious. “Yeah, Bells. The greatest.”
I shake my head at him. “You can’t say things like that, Noah.”
One brow raises. “Why not?”
“Because when you say things like that, it makes it really damn hard to hate you.”
Now it’s his turn to shake his head. “You don’t hate me, Bells.
” To my surprise, he smirks, leaning in and bringing his face closer to mine than it’s been in weeks.
He’s so close that I can feel his breath against my lips when he speaks again.
“In fact, I think you love me. You’re just not ready to admit it yet and that’s okay. Like I said, I’ll wait.”
I blink up at him, slightly breathless at the proximity. “You sound very sure of yourself.”
“I am.” He closes the small space between us, placing a barely there kiss on my lips. My eyes fall closed, mouth parting on a breath as his soft lips touch mine, but he doesn’t deepen it. He simply pulls away, opens his eyes and smiles as though he’d just proven his point.
And I sit there, dumbfounded and annoyed, because I fell for it, hook, line and sinker.
But the most annoying part of all, is that I want him to do it again.